


In A Flash

by LittleSweetCheeks



Category: Madam Secretary
Genre: AU, F/M, Family, Friendship, Main Character Death (Off screen), Platonic Relationship, non-ship, past ship, really dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:00:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 45
Words: 60,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25975591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleSweetCheeks/pseuds/LittleSweetCheeks
Summary: A mission in Pakistan changes the course of many lives in an instant.
Relationships: Elizabeth McCord/Henry McCord
Comments: 55
Kudos: 45





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> No shipping, I swear. But it's going to be a long one.

Nadine nearly slipped to a halt on the slick floor of the breakroom. Blake turned from the tea he was making to see her, as well as a woman he vaguely recognized as a float receptionist, rush in. “You’re needed at the White House immediately.” Nadine demanded. “The Secretary’s security is going to drive you over; they’re waiting for you.”

He put down the mug, confused, the Secretary was tucked away in her office. “What?”

“Russell is waiting for you.” She rushed forward, taking the mug. “I’ll take this in, go!” She nearly pushed him into motion. “Hurry!”

Still just as confused, Blake rushed for the elevator and then nervously shifted until the doors opened in the garage. Sure enough, two of the agents were already waiting in an idling SUV. “What’s going on?” He questioned as he climbed in.

“All we know is we were instructed to get you to the White House as fast as possible.” The driver answered.

Generally, he was never rushed urgently anywhere unless it was at his boss’s side, so this urgency now was entirely out of his depth and comfort level. Once the SUV stopped, he rushed through the halls until he came to Russell’s office. “You wanted me?” He panted from the exertion.

The look on Russell’s face made his heart nearly stop. “Good, you’re here, come on, we need to get to the Oval Office immediately.” He grabbed a stack of files and waved for Blake to follow him.

Blake swallowed, nerves only getting worse. He was never the guy who went _into_ the Oval Office, sure, he’d spent plenty of time parked in the hall outside, but that was his job, to sit in the hall and wait. He carefully followed Russell in and hesitated, only for the older man to wave at the couches.

“Sit! Sit! We don’t have much time! We have to get you back to the Truman as fast as possible, so this is going to be quick and dirty and I’m sorry.” Russell sagged into the couch opposite. He didn’t stand when Dalton appeared, so Blake stayed in his seat as well. “Let’s get to it.”

Dalton took a seat beside his Chief of Staff. “Blake, thank you for getting here so fast.” He drew a breath. “Henry’s been working for the CIA for a while now and earlier this week was sent into Pakistan on a mission. Elizabeth was read in on most of the details, but there was a side mission on the ground he was there to handle as well. Unfortunately, that mission went bust and Henry’s, well, out intel finally confirmed it, he’s dead.”

Blake simply sat and stared. “Wha- what? When?”

“He left Tuesday-” Russell started, only for Blake to cut him off.

“I know that.” It was close to a snap. “When was the mission, when did it go wrong?”

“Tuesday night.” Russell sighed.

“So, you’ve known for…three days?” He was incredulous.

“We weren’t certain of anything before. Our intel only came in in the last hour.” Dalton shook his head.

“Wh- why are you telling me this?” He looked between them. “I don’t understand.”

Russell’s face fell even further than it had been. “Because we’re about to send you back to the office, where you will calmly and with minimal emotion collect your boss and quietly escort her here with the claim that she is needed for a meeting with the President that you do not know the details of. She won’t expect you to know. You are then going to escort her back into this room where you will stand at her side while we tell her that Henry’s dead.”

“We need you to have your reaction behind you so you can help with whatever she needs.” Dalton looked at him with sadness in his eyes. “I have quietly sent agents to collect the kids, they’ll be upstairs with Lydia. I’ve known the McCords for thirty years, I feel I can safely say that this is going to destroy her. I know…” He frowned, staring down at his folded hands a minute. “She’ll need someone to lean on and she’ll be too mad at me for a long time yet.”

The point of him being read in like this was suddenly becoming clear. “You think she’ll lean on me.”

“She’s going to need a friend who is close enough to be trusted around the family but also understands this job and she and Henry’s devotion to it.” Russell leaned forward. “I don’t now what kind of life you manage to have outside of work, and I know we’re asking a lot of you, but… If you could do this?” His brows were raised, his face pleading. “I really think that after Henry, no one on earth knows her better than you.” He tapped his fingers absently on the table between them. “We’ll follow your lead for as long as it takes, you ever need anything, backup, money, anything, we’ll make it happen.”

“As long as it takes.” He considered that. Just how long would it take to come back from losing Henry.

Russell checked his watch. “We need to get you back. Unfortunately, we need to know you can handle it right now, there really isn’t time to think it over.” He stood as did Dalton beside him.

Blake stood as well. “I can handle it.”


	2. Chapter 2

The drive back felt simultaneously far too fast and too slow. He had to figure out how to fake casually telling her she was needed at the White House and then not give anything away as he rode back with her. He stepped off the elevator to find Nadine hovering anxiously.

“What was that about?”

He motioned with one hand for her to lower her voice. “Not here. I only have a second.” He led her to her office, closing the blinds as she shut the door. “I have to collect the Secretary and take her back over there. She can’t know, but she won’t be back in the office today…or any time soon. We need to cancel her entire schedule very quietly for the next week immediately and then work from there for a month. Deputy Cushing will need to be called in later today so he can take over anything that absolutely can’t be dealt with. Any scheduling beyond a month needs to be subject to availability, but with stress on the fact she likely won’t be available.” He chewed his lip and glanced toward the hall.

“For how long?” He could see the sheer confusion on her face.

“I don’t know. Three months? Six? I really don’t know.”

“Blake. What’s going on? Is this related to being called to the White House?”

“I can’t answer that yet. You’ll hear officially in an hour or so.” He swallowed. “Could you please go through her office after we leave and anything you think she might want or need for a prolonged time away, could you gather it up and have someone take it down to security?”

“You’re serious about this.” He watched as she tried to piece together the scraps of information. “I’ll get to work on it as soon as you leave.”

“Thank you.” He stared to step out, but hesitated. “It might be easier, on you, if when the call comes in that the others are with you.”

“Sure.”

==

Blake ignored the confused look Elizabeth gave him as he followed her into the Oval Office and simply stood at the end of the couch instead of waiting outside like he’d done every other time. He could see her confusion grow as both Russell and Dalton entered from the other side, neither seeming to question his presence either as both took the positions they had earlier.

With a hard swallow, he stayed still and watched her carefully as the pair provided much more detail as they explained what had happened to Henry and what they’d learned so far. He waited to the side as the shock of the news brought a tremor to her hands and a tightness to her voice, she was beginning to struggle to catch her breath. It wasn’t until Dalton softly said his name that Blake moved to her side, placing a hand on her back, and offering her a tissue. “Take a breath.” He whispered gently. “You have to remember to breathe.” He tried to coach.

“Henry’ll never breathe again.” She gasped. “Why should I.” She looked up just in time for him to see the first tears fall from her eyes. “He’s gone?” She asked him.

“I’m so sorry.” Ignoring any sense of normal professional boundaries, he wrapped her in a tight, grounding hug, pulling her close; a moment later the first sobs started. Risking a glance, he looked toward the other two men, both looked absolutely shattered over what was happening. “Could you…” He trailed off, using his eyes to indicate the door. They gave him a small nod and left, leaving just he and Elizabeth on their own. He simply held on until she wore herself down and pulled back somewhat.

“I need to find the kids.” She gasped.

“I believe they are upstairs with Lydia by now. When you’re ready, we can go up to them.”

“How do I-” Her voice caught. “How do I tell them he’s gone?”

He started to answer, but his phone buzzed, he pulled it out.

“Work?”

_Just hung up with Russell._ Nadine had typed. _Call any of us if you need anything, no matter how trivial you think it may be._

“No, not really.” He tucked it away. “Russell informed Nadine and the others. She was just touching base.” He took her hands in his. “Don’t worry about work, don’t even worry just yet about the kids, right now just focus on you. What do you need right now to get you through the next minute or two?”

“Henry…” She answered instantly before fresh tears sprang to her eyes. Her voice dropped to a whisper. “What I wouldn’t give for one more of his hugs.”

He debated a second, he knew what hugs she meant, he’d witnessed hundreds, if not thousands, of them. Standing, he pulled her to her feet. “I know it’s not the same, but…” He tugged her forward until she leaned into him and held tight until the latest tears lessened. When she finally pulled back again, he steadied her with hands on her arms. “Ready?” He searched her face.

“I think so. There’s so much-”

“Shh.” He cut in. “We are only thinking one or two minutes ahead right now. In those one or two minutes, do you want to start walking upstairs?”

“Yeah.” He started to lead her to the door only to have her stop and look up at him. “You don’t have to come.”

He shook his head. “I’m not going anywhere for a very long time.” It looked like she was going to say something else, but finally decided to turn instead and find her kids.


	3. Chapter 3

They had ended up spending hours in the residence with Lydia Dalton as the kids attempted to process the news that their father was gone. Stevie and Alison had been distraught, but Jason had lashed out angrily over the secrecy and lies he knew were surrounding Henry’s death. It was late in the evening when Lydia had pulled Elizabeth aside and offered to keep the kids there for the night, which Elizabeth had adamantly refused. That was when the First Lady had beckoned Blake over before speaking frankly to Bess.

“It’s hard to let it all out when you have others depending on you, Elizabeth. You need a little time to grieve before you feel like you must bury your feelings for the sake of the kids. Let them stay for tonight. I know you’re going to want to call your family and his and…” She sighed. “That’ll be hard enough. If the kids go home tonight, you won’t let yourself feel.”

“I don’t know what’ll happen if I’m alone.” Elizabeth admitted.

“You won’t be.” Lydia reassured, glancing to Blake to be sure. He nodded slightly in return. “Talk to the kids, see if they agree.”

“Yeah.”

Blake stood by Lydia as they watched her walk over to where the kids were. “Conrad told me about the conversation earlier.” Lydia softly started. “I know it’s a big ask, so thank you.” She started to say more, but Elizabeth was already walking back over.

“They aren’t in any rush to go back.”

“They’ll be fine here, Elizabeth.” She assured, giving her a hug again. “We’ll all get through this together.”

==

The ride to Georgetown was made in silence. Blake realized that he’d need fresh clothes and sent a text to Jay, who had a spare key, and asked him to bring a bag over and just drop it with security out front. Leading Elizabeth into the silent house, he watched and waited to see what she’d need.

Slowly, Elizabeth kicked off her shoes and dropped her jacket on a chair before carefully moving through to the kitchen. At the doorway, she hesitated. “I don’t know what to do.” She half turned back to face his direction. “Normally.” She sucked in a quick breath. “Normally I come home, and he greets me and we… We have a glass of wine and eat, but… He’s never going to cook for me again.” She leaned her back against the frame. “I can’t believe he’s really gone. How am I supposed to get through all this?”

“Right now, you don’t.” He spoke softly as he quietly walked toward her. “One minute at a time, remember? Do you want a drink of something?”

She shook her head. “I need to make calls?”

“Of course. How about we go sit in the den and you can start with Will?” With another nod, he followed her into the back and took a seat beside her as she dialed the number. He listened closely as she spoke to her brother, he’d only ever had passing meetings with him over the years, but even through the phone he could hear the worry in Will’s tone. After the call ended, he stayed in his spot as she began to call Henry’s siblings, they were all too shocked, it seemed, to comment much. Once the calls were taken care of, he left her on her own while he looked in the fridge for something to eat.

It was only just settling in for him as well, this was it, he would never have chats with his friend. He’d never listen to him tease his wife for wanting cereal at ten at night. Pulling out the milk, Blake went for a bowl and the cereal, pouring it all together before heading back to the couch. “Here you go.” He sat and pressed the bowl into her hands. “If you want something else, I’ll get whatever you want.”

“This is okay, I’m not really hungry.” She stirred the spoon around but didn’t take a bite. “I didn’t even know what to say, to any of them. They all want to know about funeral arrangements and visits and… I just don’t know.”

“We’ll figure it out tomorrow.” He watched her continue to move the spoon. “None of that is important tonight.”


	4. Chapter 4

Three terribly slow, painful, days slipped by. Blake did his best to look after everyone and manage as the funeral approached; he’d been the one to drive a suit to the funeral home and he’d stayed close at hand as the arrangements hand been finalized. He’d taken over booking hotels and keeping track of who was coming in and when, taking over the office as his own space; scheduling and management was something he could do without a problem, the activity was almost like a balm. He’d just gotten off the phone with one of Henry’s sisters, _the nice one_ he mentally added, when Elizabeth started hovering at the edge of the doorway. “Hey.” He offered her a small smile, unsure yet which mood brought her down from her room where she’d been staying much of the time.

She was in faded jeans and a too-big sweatshirt, hands pulled most of the way into the cuffs. “People are starting to come in?”

“Yes. That was He-his sister, they’re about forty-five minutes away, I sent them to the hotel first. I was about to call there and make sure that a small platter of food will be in the room for them, it’s a bit early for dinner but too late for lunch.” He let his eyes move to the laptop he’d been working on. “A few old colleagues of his are already in town, people have asked if they can stop by, but I’ve been turning them away. An upside to your security is they can’t just turn up unannounced.” He looked back to her and really studied her. “How are you right now?”

He watched her shrug and felt himself frown. There were moments when it was all too reminiscent of the time after Iran when she’d been wholly unpredictable. Standing, he crossed to her, opening his arms slightly in invitation. She shifted forward and let him hug her, then sighed. “I don’t want people to come. I don’t want to do this funeral.” He felt her start to shake. “I want Henry back, it’s not fair!” He braced himself as she pushed back just enough to bring both fists hard against his chest. “Why did he do this to me?”

Blake took a step back to brace himself and did the only thing he could do, wait out her emotions. When she started to wear herself out, he pulled her close again. “We’ll get through this.”

==

The following morning, Blake busied himself in the kitchen making coffee and organizing the basic breakfast items. Three days had been long enough to already have figured out the organization of the cabinets. The phone on the counter rang, without hesitating, he answered. “Yes?”

Security informed him that Will. Sophie, and Annie had arrived, and he told them to send them in.

“Hello.” He called out as he pulled out mugs, wiping his hands before greeting them. “I’m Blake, we spoke on the phone.”

“Right.” Will looked him over. “Liz has mentioned you before.” He turned to Sophie and Annie and introduced them. “Just a little surprised I guess that she’s working still, especially today.”

“Oh, no.” He shook his head. “Not working. I’m- My job isn’t limited to just the office even under normal circumstances and now…” He wasn’t sure where he was going with that, so he switched subjects entirely. “I have coffee made and some bagels, muffins, and the like.”

“Are my cousins upstairs?” Annie asked.

“Uh, yes. They’re all finishing getting ready.” Blake confirmed, watching her go. It was a question from Will that made him turn back around.

“How is she doing?” He was studying Blake. “I’m not sure she ever properly processed our parents dying, she can’t ignore this.”

“It’s been rough, but I think getting through today will be the hardest part for a while.” The phone rang again, and he turned to answer, Henry’s family had turned up. After welcoming Henry’s siblings, Blake went up the back stairs to see what progress was being made, shooing the kids down to say hello before letting himself into the master bedroom. “Ma’am?” He called out softly, not spotting her on the window seat right away. When he realized she was dressed but just sitting and staring out the window, he pushed the door most of the way shut and crossed the room. “People are arriving downstairs.”

“I don’t want to do this, Blake. It hurts. It really feels like my heart is breaking.” She gasped, finally turning to him with tears in her eyes. “Henry’s gone.”

He didn’t know what to say to comfort her, so he stepped closer. “I’ll be right here.” Gently, he began to help her down, looking around for anything else she’d need. “Let’s get downstairs.” He led the way, watching as the family drew her in as best they could while he made a plate of food.

“I’m not hungry.” She nudged the plate away.

“You have to eat.” When he could see her start to resist, he added on. “It’s not a choice. Not today.” He leaned closer so he wouldn’t be overheard. “You’re going to need your strength.”

She frowned. “What if I can’t keep it down?”

“You can’t play what-ifs, one minute at a time, remember?” He waited for her nod before handing her the plate again. When he straightened back up, he realized more than a few people had been watching them.

==

“Forgive me, but you look like shit.” Nadine’s candid comment both startled and nearly amused Blake.

“Gee, thanks.” He was hovering in the foyer as mourners were entering the church. “I was hoping I was pulling off ‘moderately held together’ at least.”

Hers was the most assessing eye he’d encountered so far that day. “Where’s the Secretary?” He could see the true worry in her eyes.

“In the chapel, she asked for a little time to herself.”

Nadine nodded. “Talk a minute?” She watched him nod and then lead the way to another small room. “How are you doing, Blake? I’ve barely heard a word from you.”

He considered the question, how was _he_ doing? “Honestly? I have no clue.” He shook his head. “I’ve been nonstop since I got pulled in by Russell.” His eyes cut to the door. “I’ve been driving her to the therapist, but honestly, I think it’s even too soon for that. She’s been having nightmares and sl-”

“Blake” She cut off, placing a hand on his arm. “I asked about you.” She forced him to meet her gaze.

“I’ve been trying to keep everything running smoothly, I made all the arrangements for this. I’ve been sitting with her after nightmares and trying to get her to eat.” He drew a breath, surprised when it sounded so ragged. “I’ve been trying not to remember that Henry was more than just her husband.”

“He was your friend.” She finished for him. “Have you cried at all? Anything?” He shook his head and she opened her arms. “Come here. You need a minute to fall apart too.”

Blake allowed himself to cry for a few minutes before pulling away. “Thank you, Nadine.”

“I’ll call tomorrow?” She tipped her head to study him. “I’ll make a point to check in every few days.” She waited for some acknowledgement. “We miss having you around the office.”

==

How anyone in mourning was supposed to survive receiving lines and small talk, Blake would never understand. The process of having the funeral, though, seemed like it might have helped. It was a point of closure. He realized as the afternoon wore on that Elizabeth seemed to perhaps even out the very slightest bit. At the very least, she was engaging in some of that small talk, though he’d roped his coworkers into making sure no one attempted to talk anything close to shop.

The kids had asked to go to the hotel to spend the evening with their cousins, Blake arranged another room and followed Elizabeth into the motorcade when the time came, doing yet another assessment once it was quiet. “Is there anything in particular you would like to do this evening, Ma’am?” She didn’t answer the entire ride home, she only stared out the window. When the SUV came to a stop, he helped her out and followed into the house.

“Blake?” She looked up at him.

“Yes, Ma’am?”

“Thank you for today.” She started toward the stairs. “Do you think it’s too soon to move most of Henry’s things? Maybe at least box stuff up? It hurts to see his stuff, especially his clothes.”

“When you’re ready will be the right time.”

“Maybe tomorrow?”

“We can do it tomorrow then.”

“Also, Blake?” She waited until he looked up at her again. “Would you do one other thing for me?”

“Anything.”

“Would you call me Elizabeth? At least sometimes? Henry was the only person who did and… it’s always a formal title at work or Bess or some other nickname. I just… I don’t want to lose me now too.”

“Whatever you wish.”


	5. Chapter 5

Blake shut the file on the desk and began collecting what needed to go in a bag to head to the office. It had been three weeks since Henry’s death, three weeks since Elizabeth had been anywhere near the Truman Building, and one week since he’d started going in for a few hours a day to start getting back up to speed. It had been odd but nice getting back in the office, Nadine seemed set on checking up on him regularly, and the schedule hadn’t piled up too much.

Slowly, certain things of Henry’s had been cleared out and put into storage based on how much pain they caused Elizabeth or, as she’d put it, simple practicality. He and Jason had boxed up most of Henry’s clothes, save for some shirts that Elizabeth or the kids wanted, but then his watch and rings were still on the dresser. The joint office was another space where some of Henry was gone- work files had been collected and gone back to the correct organization, the desk cleaned out, but then Henry’s books, not just the ones he’d written, but also the ones he’d loved to read, were still on the shelves. Reluctantly, the now vacant desk had become Blake’s temporary workspace.

Leaving his bag on top of the desk, Blake headed for the kitchen to start filling travel mugs with coffee, checking the clock just as Alison and Jason reappeared with bookbags over their shoulders. “Got everything?”

Jason held up a form. “Know where Mom is? I forgot I have to have this permission slip signed for the class trip coming up, it’s due today.”

“Uh.” Blake looked around. “Not sure, give it here.” He accepted the page and read it over, the information coming to him. “Oh, this trip.” He found a pen and scribbled Elizabeth’s signature across the bottom like he’d done many times before. “Here you go.” He handed it back. “Anything else?” When both kids shook their heads, he smiled. “Have a good day then. We’re doing a full day today, so if you need anything this afternoon, just call me, chances are I’ll be able to get away easier than your Mom.” He was surprised when Alison gave him a quick hug before following her brother out the door.

The house was silent a few minutes before he heard Elizabeth coming down the stairs. “The kids leave already?”

“Just now. I think they’re ready to get back to something normal.” Up to now, both teens had been doing schoolwork from home. “How about you?”

“How about me, what?” She finished making her coffee in the mug Blake had started.

“Ready to get back to normal?” He watched her look around for a minute. “Your bags are on your desk and for once you don’t have to find any files you hauled upstairs.”

She chuckled. “All that starts again tonight, no doubt. And… I think I am. Ready, that it. My new normal.”

“Let’s go then.” He headed for the door, grabbing his jacket and then their bags, holding the door open for her to walk out into the morning sunshine. “Day one of the new normal.”

==

“Well, you look a lot better than you did a few weeks ago.” Nadine caught up to Blake in the break room. “How are you doing?”

Unlike weeks ago, this time the smile came easier. “Better. The kids started officially back to school today, they seemed excited this morning, but I’ll still check in I think this afternoon just to see how it went. Stevie went back to work and school last week, so we haven’t seen too much of her. Nightmares and everything seem to be easing up; and there didn’t seem to be any apprehension on the drive in.” He selected a pastry for himself and took a bite. “I’m hoping we can keep the schedule crisis-free this week and then start wading back into the hard stuff slowly.” He stopped talking when he noticed the amused look she was giving him. “What?”

“I am going to ask this and please don’t read into it- Have you gone back to your place for anything other than picking up more of your things in the past few weeks?”

“No?” He met her gaze and then looked away. “Is it weird? We all kind of fell into this rhythm and it’s kind of hard to just walk away from that.”

She hummed, tipping her head back and forth as she thought. “Not totally.”

He suddenly didn’t look convinced. “Let’s get through this week and then I’ll go back to my place.”

She patted his arm. “One day at a time.”

“Okay. It’s a step up from the one minute at a time I was having to live by before.” Collecting his mug and snack, he followed Nadine through the halls to the conference room for another meeting. The day was mostly a series of meetings just to get Elizabeth back up to speed, broken by a trip to the White House to meet up with Russell and POTUS. She was still over there when Blake checked his watch and realized that Ali and Jason should be done with school. Sitting at his desk, he dialed Ali’s number and waited for the line to connect. “Hey, Alison, it’s me. How was school today?”

“Fine. I mean, a lot of kids asked me about my dad and the teachers kept reassuring me that it was okay if I wasn’t up for doing my work, but it was good.”

“So better than you worried it would go?”

“How do you do that?” She huffed. “It’s creepy. But yes, better. Jason was glad he didn’t have to do anything at all.” There was teasing in her tone.

“Hey!” Jason shouted in the background. “I didn’t take advantage of it though!”

Blake laughed. “Well, right now the day should end at the right time, so be thinking about dinner. If you’re willing to help me out, I thought I would try my hand at stir fry?”

“Sure!” Ali agreed. Blake only had limited cooking skills, but he’d found they’d been improving over past weeks now that there were others to feed regularly. “See you tonight.”

“Behave you two. I’ll let your mom know I called when she gets back.” He disconnected the call and then nearly jumped out of his chair when he looked up to find Nadine standing by his desk. “How do you just appear like that?”

The smirk she gave him was full of amusement at his reaction. “Was that the McCord kids?”

“Yes.”

The smirk stayed but shifted to something he didn’t quite understand. “Should I just bring you a form to update your permanent address of record?”

That startled him. “What?”

Her chuckle was low. “You heard me.” She shook her head, teasing. “You are in for good, Blake.”

He was just rolling his eyes at her when Elizabeth rushed in from her meeting. “Blake! Shoot! I totally forgot. Did Jason say anything about a signature he needed? I just remembered he said something over the weekend and I totally spaced about it this morning!” As she rambled, he tried several times to interrupt her. “I can’t believe I forgot! Poor baby was going to have a hard day anyway and now this.”

“Ma’am!” He finally got her attention. “Take a breath.” He drew a breath until she copied and held it. “I signed it this morning before he left and both he and Alison had okay days at school. People asked questions, but they said it was fine.”

“You talked to them?” Her voice was thin from holding her breath.

“Exhale.” He reminded, brows raising in amusement when she gust out the air. “I just called and checked in with Alison.”

“Oh. Thank you. I’ve missed them today.”

“Well, Ma’am.” Nadine stepped back into the conversation. “You should be able to leave at a reasonable time today, probably all week.”

“How’d you swing that?”

She gave her boss a coy grin. “Oh, we haven’t told anyone you’re back yet.” She leaned closer. “Turns out none of your foreign counterparts want to deal with Cushing any more than we do.”

Elizabeth’s eyes went wide, and mouth dropped open at Nadine’s words. “Nadine!”

She only chuckled. “A little deception for world peace never hurt anyone.”

With a shake of her head, Elizabeth headed for her office, leaving Blake and Nadine alone again at his desk.

“You signed Jason’s school form?” She couldn’t help latching onto it.

“Technically I forged her signature onto Jason’s school form. Which I’ve been doing for a really long time.”

“Just wait.” She didn’t add anything else as she walked away.

==

Blake couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed so hard. They’d made it home on time and he and Alison had made stir fry and it even ‘came out edible’, according to Jason. There had been a moment of near disaster when Jason had goaded him into trying to toss the vegetables like in the fancy restaurants and he’d nearly set it all flying everywhere. It had been fun though, relaxing, and it had been nice to hear everyone laugh.

When they were on the couch later watching TV, for some reason Nadine’s comment from that morning crossed his mind and he looked around at all of them. He, they, had come home to Alison and Jason both finishing up homework, the latter had math questions he wanted his mom’s help with but Alison was working on her fashion column and when he’d asked, she’d eagerly shared what she’d been doing.

Soon enough, Elizabeth was shooing them off to bed and he found himself loading the dishwasher and starting it as she pulled the wine back out of the fridge and topped up their glasses.

She let out a heavy sigh. “So, how did I do?” She sipped her wine.

He cocked a brow but didn’t answer, instead leaning against the sink as she leaned over the other side of the island.

“Henry was never in too much of the work part of my life, so I don’t really miss him there, but… I think I’m going to miss our park lunches and then this.” She waved at the room. “Dinner, kids, winding down. Having him to come home to made the job easier.” She went quiet for a while before sipping her drink again. “And now Ali leaves for college in another year. Too soon. Stevie lives with her boyfriend, soon I’ll just have Jason here. And I… He was my best friend. That sounds cheesy.”

“And yet it was true.” When her head shot up in surprise, he smiled. “Anyone with eyes only needed a minute to see the two of you only ever saw one another. He loved you. Depending on your beliefs, he still loves you. Henry believed to some degree in life beyond death, I believe if anyone could keep loving someone else for all eternity, it would be Henry.”

Tears welled in her eyes. “Wow. That’s… Talk about cheesy!” She laughed despite the tears. “But thank you.”

“Not to rain on your delightful parade you have going here.” He grinned, making her chuckle again. “But everyone seems to be getting back on even footing, so I was thinking over the weekend about moving my stuff back to my place.”


	6. Chapter 6

Two weeks after that first day back, Blake had been sitting in the hall outside the Oval Office when Russell rushed out, spotting him as he hurried through. “You! Just the man, in my office, now!”

Confusion winning out over irritation, Blake complied. “What?”

“What’d you do?” Russel demanded as soon as the door was shut.

“I- don’t know what you’re talking about?”

“She came back fine, still miffed at POTUS and I, but fine enough and a darn sight better than she was at the beginning. I was thrilled! Sure, she wasn’t totally one hundred percent, but she was getting her bite back. Now? Now it’s like she’s backsliding to something from years ago!”

“I didn’t do anything! I haven’t even been around outside of work to do anything! So, it wasn’t me.”

“Wait… I thought you were staying at the house?”

“I was, I did. Pretty much from the day you told her through the first week back, then I went back to my place.”

Russell’s face contorted in a mix of confusion and processing this news, comparing it to the timeline of his complaints. “I see.” He sank into his chair.

Blake’s patience was running short. “You see what?”

He sighed. “I can be having the most awful day and a call to my wife, even when I have to skate around the truth, just getting it out, saying whatever I’m up against just blows, it helps me get my head back on straight. Helps me keep going. The McCords were infuriatingly closer. We even ended up making special exceptions to Bess being read in because them not being allowed to talk was ripping more than just their marriage apart, it made them impossible to work with.” Russell tossed a hand in the air. “No Henry, no talking…more impossible… And this time we can’t just read him in and fix it.”

“I- I’ll think of something.”

“You do that.” He watched Blake start to leave. “Fast please, because I’m not sure we can have another meeting like what I just walked out of.”

In the SUV, Blake took stock of Elizabeth, really looked at her, and realized Russell wasn’t exaggerating. She looked upset and he knew she’d avoid releasing that on the staff or the kids, which meant that, much to his irritation, Russell was right. He decided now was as good a time as any. “Matt, let’s swing past the park?” He addressed the agent up front.

“Sure.” He rerouted away from their path.

He ignored her questioning look until the vehicle stopped and they climbed out. Checking to see just how far away the detail was planning to walk, he made a split decision to guide her along with one arm wrapped around her back. “Okay, talk to me, Elizabeth.”

She looked up at him in a bit of surprise but didn’t say anything until they’d found a bench and sat, his arm now around her shoulders. “I must be really acting like a crazy person if you’re breaking out the park and the coddling and the name.” She tried to joke. “I miss Henry.” Her face twisted as she tried to stave off tears. “I miss having him there to listen about my bad day. I mean, I miss my husband, but so much of the time I miss my friend. This job is hard with no one to talk to.”

“Well, I have an entirely crazy idea…” He glanced down at her, unsure what her reaction would be. “What if I moved back in? As in, forever? Like, give up my place, full on, all of it?”

“You don’t have to, what about your life?”

“I don’t have a life. Well, not really, but I don’t miss it because I’m not out looking for one.”

“But then you would be working around the clock.”

“I would be working and then spending free time with a friend.” He corrected. “I’m really offering here.”

“I- I don’t know what to say.”

“Well, if you say no, then we do our best to find you a new way to survive this job. If you say yes, Elizabeth, then you know you can tell me anything and I have the clearance to know what you know. Which means we can talk, you can tell me about the bad things, but also you won’t need to tell me because I’ll already know why maybe you don’t want to talk. I’m aware I’m not Henry, but I like to think I’m a friend.”

“I’ll think about it?”

“Just let me know.” He let the conversation end, but still kept his arm around her.

==

Blake didn’t bring it up again, but late Friday night, his phone rang, and he had a feeling he was about to get his answer. “Hi.” He greeted as the line connected.

He heard her sniffle and then a sob escaped. “It’s so silent.” She whispered. “Would you, would you come over?”

He didn’t even hesitate, staying on the phone as he rushed to load a bag and then on speaker as he drove across town. All the while, he kept her talking about anything, about their day, about the kids, anything to fill the silence. When he finally walked through the door, he found her on the couch. “Hey.” He ended the call, sitting beside her and pulling her close. “I’m right here.”

It seemed she was content to simply curl into him for a while and so they sat together for nearly an hour before she started to speak. “After my parents died, Will and I were sent off to boarding schools, so I never really spent much time with him after the funeral. I stayed on campus sometimes over breaks. One winter I was the only one there and I got snowed in, I was alone with this silence for days… It felt like my whole life was silence then. And the silence was so… heavy.” She paused long enough that he wondered if she was going to say more. “I went off to UVA and the silence seemed to follow me until… Until I met Henry. Henry was so alive and exciting and… loud. Free, relaxed. Even when we sat together and didn’t talk, it didn’t feel the same as the silence. It was just the quiet that felt… different. Peace. It was comforting and warm instead of heavy. The last couple months, the silence has been creeping back in. And then I miss him even more.”

“I know.”

“It feels like it’s swallowing me.” She twisted so they were almost facing one another. “Would you really move in if I asked?” A frown played at her lips.

“I would. For you, for Henry. He wouldn’t want you to feel swallowed by the silence either.”

“I’m asking.”

“I’ll start packing my things this weekend.”


	7. Chapter 7

It had been three months since Blake had turned up in Nadine’s office and informed her that she had, in fact, been right and he was moving into the McCord house permanently. He pulled the last waffle out of the iron as Elizabeth came in the back door from a morning run. “You really doing this running thing or were you just torturing Mike B?”

“I can run!” She insisted as she sagged onto the stairs. “You run. Every stupid day at like crazy o’clock in the morning.”

“I run because I enjoy it.” He gestured to her with the tongs. “You clearly do not.” He dropped it as Ali and Jason bid their goodbyes and left. “Elizabeth.” He glanced toward the front to make sure the kids had indeed left before turning to the oven and pulling out a plate. “Saved them from Jason.” He grinned, placing the plate of waffles on the counter.

“Oh!” Her eyes lit up. “See, this is why I need to run. So I can eat like this all the time.”

He shook his head and checked his watch. “I need to get going. I promised Jay I’d help run the early meeting today. Anything else you need from me?”

“I have waffles, I’m good.” She waved. “See you at the office.”

Blake double checked he had everything. “Enjoy your peace and quiet.” He grinned as he headed out the door.

==

The full staff meeting later had gone about as each one did, Matt was squirreled away in his office and no world powers were violating anyone else’s borders. Elizabeth rushed out of the meeting for an unscheduled meeting somewhere else and the entire senior staff turned to him, after a beat, Blake had to ask. “What?”

Nadine scoffed. “A spontaneous meeting and _you_ don’t know about it? Shouldn’t that worry you?”

“I- I was still processing that Jay’s comment went over so well.” He pointed. “I was six steps into damage control on that.”

“I knew it was a risk.” Jay agreed. “But she’s been doing well lately.”

“So?” Nadine rounded the table to Blake. “Any ideas?’

“She’s been torturing Mike B about something; I don’t know the details. I swear I have no more insight now than I did before.”

==

Blake brushed into Nadine’s office later, handing her a binder she’d been in search of. “Found it, the inducement ideas are tabbed already to save you some time.”

“Thank you.” She flipped it open, glancing over her frames. “Can I share a possible problem with you? It’s more of a heads-up really and I don’t actually have any hard proof except Mike’s talk.”

“What’s going on?”

“He seems to think the White House is going to clean house for some reason at State. I haven’t dug into it yet, but the names he gave are legit enough.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I- Does she know?”

“Oh, Mike mentioned it. She brushed it off, but I figured if she seems off later, then you have something to work from.”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

==

“Blake!” Elizabeth’s voice carried up the stairs.

“Yeah. Hold on.” Blake pulled his robe around himself and made his way down to the den where only one lamp was on. Elizabeth was curled on the couch, a drink in her hand.

“Will you come sit with me?”

“Sure.”

“I might… I might be losing my job that I love. I never told anyone that I think I love this job. I used to hate it, I wanted to quit, but I love it so much now.” He simply listened as she rambled. “And now, the asset Henry and I were fighting about before he died? Might not be dead. There’s a chance. And he’ll never know.” He watched a tear track down her cheek. “It will take a few more secret meetings to find out for sure.”

“Then we’ll make your schedule allow for some OTR time.” He mentally began reviewing the next day’s plans. “Is there anything else you need me to do?”

“Could you just stay down here a while? Everything’s such a mess.”

He looked her over before shifting so his back was in the corner of the couch, angling himself so one foot was on the floor and the other leg stretched out behind her. “Come here.” He tugged her sleeve, taking her glass when she relinquished it and balancing it on his leg. Once she was settled, they just stayed there for a while, his free hand on her shoulder.

“Henry didn’t ask first.”

He worked to try and figure out what the seemingly random statement meant.

“Jay, this morning.” She eventually clarified. “The first guy, he was joking…mostly. And it was more an intent to propose later if no one else beat him to it.” Her voice broke on the last word. “I gave so much of my heart to him…and then he died.” Blake assumed she meant Henry and was about to comment until she carried on. “Both men I loved died because of evil in this world.” Her next breath was ragged. “Henry was so good. He knew how in love I’d been before, but with Henry it was so…” She drew in a deep breath. “He even encouraged me to go to the funeral halfway around the world.”

And like that, the pieces fell into place. He must’ve reacted somehow because he heard her soft chuckle.

“Yeah. Imagine me living there.” She trailed off again. Blake lifted the glass and took a swallow, considering how much heartache Elizabeth must’ve faced in her life. It made sense to him why she felt so compelled to save this one person.


	8. Chapter 8

“So.” Nadine tracked Blake to where he was laying out binders in the Secretary’s otherwise empty office. She’d just spent another day with the Secretary at an event on behalf of the President’s reelection campaign. “Jessica is not doing well. She’s not used to handling someone so…” She trailed off, unsure of the right descriptor.

He glanced up without lifting his face entirely. “Stubborn? Opinionated? Unpredictable? Easily derailed?” He opened his mouth to keep going but she put her hand up to stop him with a sigh. He was the only one who knew why POTUS was having Elizabeth do all this, the idea of her getting the VP spot was exciting.

She took a seat across from him. “Could you just talk to her?”

“Jessica?”

“The Secretary. Blake, the President asked her to do these events and interviews to help him run a second term. If he doesn’t get that second term, we’re all out of jobs, that’s how this works. Please stop tormenting Jessica and help her a bit?”

He laughed. “I don’t torment her!”

Her glare was withering. “She can barely string three words together around you and stutters those. Somehow, you have made her scared of you.”

A Cheshire grin bloomed on his face. “It’s been nice having that power.”

“There’s an interview later, please, for all our sakes, have the Secretary ready to handle it?” She rose again. “I really don’t want to field the phone calls from Russell if she goes off script.”

“I will do my best.”

The tone in his voice made her frown at him. “You better do better than that.”

==

Blake’s less than willing attitude toward the whole idea of campaigning for the president was that it meant, sometimes, that he had to be the plus one to certain functions, such as glad-handing donors who would promise more money for just a minute of the Secretary’s attention. Ivy League had trained him well in the art of schmoozing, but he still hated it. When Russell found them in the crowd, he turned away just long enough to find them both glasses of champagne, by the time he came back to the spot, only Russell remained. “What’d you do with her?” He asked the Chief of Staff.

“Set her on Julius Burton. Or he on her, not sure yet.”

“Isn’t he the guy who has the no-bids on that base?” Blake recognized the name.

“Yeah.” Russell sipped his own drink, glancing at Blake and the two drinks he was holding. “I have a feeling you’re going to be needing both of those.”

==

Working on toast the next morning, Blake listened to the kids talk. He’d fallen into a routine of sorts, some mornings were like before, he was in the office by seven to manage the constant influx of issues; but then other mornings were like this, checking emails and working remotely from the table while the family ate and talked around him.

“My computer is possessed!” Jason exclaimed. “I’m trying to submit my homework and it keeps rebooting!”

Alison teased him some more before he decided to jump in. “I’ll take it in, I’ll get someone to look at it who can do more than just bang on the keyboard.”

“Yeah. Fine.” Jason huffed. “But don’t go through my stuff!”

Blake’s brows went up. “What do you have on here that you don’t want me to see?”

He seemed to think a second before responding. “Uh, nothing.” He grabbed his bag and stormed out.

Once they were alone, Elizabeth turned at the counter. “You really think it’s a good use of resources to have one of the guys look at Jason’s broken computer?”

He began to gather his things. “Oliver owes me a favor for…” He frowned. “A thing that happened. I think I can cash in on a little of that with a look at a laptop.”

“A little of that favor? Must be a pretty big thing.” She chuckled.

He felt himself flush. “Let’s not talk about the size of the thing.”

==

By evening, as the debate played on TV, Blake was already ready to dive headlong into the hack on Jason’s laptop. He was surprised when Elizabeth walked through the door. “I thought you were watching at the White House?”

“Jay’s there. Russell and I shouldn’t be in a room together at the moment.”

“Oh?” He reached for his phone and shot a text to Jay letting him know she’d gotten home and to ask what had happened. The president talking on the screen distracted him from checking whatever reply Jay sent back as he began to talk about climate change. “That’s… There’s no way that was part of his script.” He twisted to look up at her.

“No. It’s not. The party line is climate change isn’t real, that’s…”

“I guess POTUS still listens to you.”

“Russell is going to kill me.”


	9. Chapter 9

He played a few more bars and then frowned, stopping to erase some notes he’d penciled onto the page already before starting the line again, humming as he went. From his spot at the piano, Blake could see Elizabeth on the sofa pouring over work she’d brought home. She’d taken to working in the living room or office instead of up in her bedroom when he was practicing at the piano, especially if the kids were out or already in their rooms for the night. Blake didn’t stop playing when the phone rang, security announcing someone had arrived. He kept working as Elizabeth let Russell in and they bantered back and forth. Where he was sitting was hidden by the stairs until the pair made it to the couch, Russell was surprised to see Blake sitting at the piano.

“You play?”

“Yes.” Blake smiled mildly, wine and music was doing a lot to keep him from being ruffled. “Currently I’m writing a new piece though.” His fingers continued the tune absently. “The best part about the move was upgrading from my portable keyboard to this beauty.” He petted the slick top of the piano.

Elizabeth turned, grinning at Russell. “He’s named it Persephone.” She laughed.

Russell thought a second, his brows pulling together. “Bringer of destruction?”

Blake laughed that time, shrugging. “I guess it only makes sense to a musician.” He stopped playing. “I’ll go so you can talk.”

“No.” Russell motioned for him to stay. “You’re fine.” He poured himself a drink. “I need to talk about this whole independent run situation.” He caught Blake’s surprise. “He doesn’t know?”

“I might have failed to mention it.”

“She is encouraging Dalton to not give up, to run as an independent, which is insane, but unfortunately for me, he’s onto the idea. So now I must choose, the president or the party I’ve been a part of my whole life.” He tossed back his drink. “Neither of you get it, you’ve never been political a day in your lives. Public servants through and through.” He shook his head. “I’ve spent all night running the numbers. There is one tiny shot at getting him another term, but it’ll take a lot of sacrifice.” He looked between them. “We’ll be running on your popularity and your foreign policy agenda. That’ll get us in. Dalton is poplar enough, but you’re the showstopper. If you switch the VP, all the foreign policy stuff ends. So…” He sighed.

“You need me to stay at State.”

“Yes.”

“Conrad was pretty insistent that he’ll only run if I’m on the ticket.”

“That’s the other reason I’m here. I need you to be the one to convince him this is the only way to win.” He set the glass down. “Now, I need to get home to Carol. Have a good night, think about it. We’ll talk to Conrad in the morning.” He let himself out.

Silence washed in for a moment before Blake spoke. “No independent has ever won.”

Elizabeth turned to him. “Then I guess we’re making history.”


	10. Chapter 10

“You’re coming with me to the FBI meeting, right?” Elizabeth asked as she gathered her things. “I can’t believe someone’s stalking my kids!” She sucked in a breath but then focused on the next one being steadier.

“I will be there. I am scheduled to touch base with Nadine about the Algeria trip, but I already called her and said I’d need to change it to a phone meeting from the car. I already called the schools and put them on high alert for any issues, clearly their systems have been hacked as well and I wanted to hear directly that they were taking this seriously.” When he turned to face her, she was looking at him over the rim of her glasses.

“The FBI was going to be in touch with them.”

“But if I talk to them, then I know what to quote back later when they screw something up. Ready to go?”

“Uh, yeah.”

The meeting at the FBI took little more than an hour, during which he’d gotten through everything he’d needed to with Nadine. Once they were back in the SUV, he frowned. “I feel so naked without my phones.”

Elizabeth patted his knee. “It’s only for a few hours, they said, you’ll survive.”

“I don’t think you realize just how much my generation depends on our devices.” He tried but failed to keep up the pout as they headed to the Truman building. “I’m going to check in with Nadine.”

“Sure, see you in the conference room.” She waved him away as they stepped off the elevator.

==

Answering his desk phone, Blake was surprised to hear already from the FBI agent they’d met with that morning. “How may I help you, Agent?”

“We’ve been through all the devices but one. They’re all clean except for the laptop that started this whole thing, but this one marked Jason’s phone? We can’t get past the security code.”

“What? You’re the FBI, isn’t that your thing?”

“Can you just ask the Secretary to get the code for us, please?”

“I- I’ll talk to her. Will I be able to pick up the other devices later?”

“Yeah, swing by and we’ll have them ready.”

“Thanks.” Blake considered the options a minute, Jason was not going to react well to being asked for his password and they needed to be leaving for Algeria soon. Deciding there was little he could do now, he headed to the Hoover to collect the devices, hoping he would be back before Elizabeth got back from her last meeting.

==

Nadine half listened across the plane as she read over the paperwork in front of her. She normally only got small peeks into moments between Blake and their boss, most of them professional, this was really the first time since Henry’s death and Blake’s move that she was getting the opportunity to see them together relaxed.

Across the aisle, they were on opposite sides of the table working, their piles seemingly mixed as they plowed through paperwork. They bantered about a TV show and then Blake’s music until his tablet pinged.

“Ma’am.” Blake was flipping through pictures on the screen. “The FBI got into Jason’s phone. It’s… not good.”

“He’s been hacked?”

“Uh, no. I think the hacking is definitely not the worst thing at the moment.” He passed the tablet over.

“Oh my god.” She scrolled. “I swear at some point a drinking talk happened.” Elizabeth shook her head. “How far back do these go?”

Blake took the tablet back and looked. “They’re all since Henry died. Maybe… Maybe he just needs to have another talk? I mean, it’s understandable he lost his dad so suddenly and it’s still really new?” He flipped the tablet over so neither of them could see the screen. “I’m sorry.”

“Is it wrong that I’m a tiny bit glad for this stalker because I found this out? I mean, I never would’ve known otherwise.” Her voice dropped. “I’m always so busy, I never notice their issues.”

Nadine couldn’t help eavesdropping and watching as well. The tone shifted and Blake leaned on the table, stretching a hand across until it rested on Elizabeth’s arm.

“You love your kids and you would move heaven and earth for them. But they’re all old enough to be accountable for their own actions too.”

==

“She’s headed back to Algeria?” Jay asked as he and Nadine both approached Blake’s desk. “On her own?”

“Well, she’ll have her security with her.”

“Frankly, I wasn’t ready to go back.” Nadine admitted.

“She got wind of something when she was getting an update from DIA, I have no idea what it was, she was being cagey, so there’s a good chance it’s something I would freak out about.” He admitted, ignoring Jay’s response to answer the phone. Slamming it down again almost immediately, he grabbed his coat and started for the elevator. “Something happened at Jason’s school. I’ve got to go.”

The drive to the school took a lot longer than he would’ve liked, he managed to check in with Jason’s detail three times on the drive over. He had no idea how Jason, of all people, got SWAT’d at school. He’d been unable to reach Elizabeth and he worried it meant she was already in the air.

“Todd!” He called out to the agent he knew was one of Jason’s. “What’s going on?”

“Mister Moran.” Todd began leading the way through the building. “Jason’s fine. FBI thinks is was a prank, the school’s phones and cameras were hacked. It looks like a planned out attack. This way. Is the Secretary on her way?” He led around a corner.

“I couldn’t reach her; she was headed to the airport though.”

“Okay. We aren’t sure yet exactly how it all went down, but no one was hurt.” He opened a classroom door to reveal Jason on his own.

“Jason.” Blake rushed in, checking him over. “Are you okay?”

“No Mom?”

“She was headed for a flight; I think we just missed her.”

“Is this why you guys took our phones and gave us bodyguards?”

“I don’t know if it’s related. Maybe?”

“Fine. Can we just go home?” He huffed. “You’re starting to freak me out with that look.”

He tried to school his features. “Let’s go.” Blake waved to the door. “Pretty sure you’re still grounded though.”

==

Elizabeth let herself in the front door and spotted Blake almost immediately. “Hey.”

She watched his eyes scan the room before finally landing on her. “Hi.” He took another mouthful of the drink in his hand before shaking his head. “The kids are upstairs.”

Walking closer, she could see how upset and keyed up he was. “What’s going on, Blake?”

“The pictures, then the thing at Jason’s school, the hack on the house while we were gone…it seems like every week it’s another little escalation.”

“I know.” She’d never seen him like this before.

“What’s the point of me being here?” He tossed his free hand in the air. “I’m not protecting anyone. I’m sure Henry wouldn’t have let any of this happen.”

Starting to understand a little of the problem, she tugged the glass free. “You don’t know that Henry would have stopped any of this. He wouldn’t have magically found the stalker. And you’re not here to protect us. Not me, not the kids. That’s what we have diplomatic security for. You’re are here to just be my friend, confidant, companion. That’s it.” She huffed. “I know you try to protect me, and the kids, but this is a lot bigger than you. We both have to let go and let the FBI and security do their jobs. It’s hard, really hard, but we don’t have a choice.”

“I’m surprisingly not used to not having a choice in anything. I don’t like it.”

“I get that. I’ve said before, I’ve never met a situation where I didn’t have a choice, but… Technically we do have a choice here. We can allow the experts to do their work or we can impede them.”

“I don’t want to stop them from finding the stalker.”

“Of course, you don’t. Now, how many was this one?” She held up the glass before finishing it off.

“Only my second.”

“Well, now you can say you didn’t have two, just one and a half. Let’s see what leftovers are around and eat something, shall we?”

“Oh, I made parmesan pasta salad earlier.” He waited for her to turn back his way in slight surprise. “I figured after today, you’d be looking for cold pasta.”

“See, you’re doing just fine looking after me, Blake. I think Henry would be proud of you.”

“Yeah.” He didn’t sound convinced.


	11. Chapter 11

After a very panicked sounding wake up call from Blake, Nadine was rushing off the elevator in search of him and the Secretary. Stepping past the FBI agents and into the inner office, she found them both in the far corner of the room; Blake spotted her over Elizabeth’s shoulder as he hugged her tight to his chest. With his eyes, he directed her to turn and see the wall where the TV was closed away. Her heart was in her throat, it must’ve been terrifying to walk in to find that. Silently, she communicated to Blake to step out of the room, bringing the Secretary as well. Leading the way back to the outer office area, she waited for them to join her. “Why don’t you go home.” She started.

“No.” Elizabeth instantly answered. “We have everything with the French to do. We can’t let this fall apart because my personal life is.” She wiped her face before walking away.

Turning to Blake, Nadine sighed. “And?”

“And she’s not going anywhere without me next to her until this situation is resolved. I’m sorry. This is just getting worse and I know, it’s not my job, but without…” He trailed off, trusting Nadine understood before picking up on a new thread of thought. “I need to do this.”

“I know. How is she? She looked…” She waved back to where she’d found them.

“She’s actually considering it; she just wants the kids safe and for it all to end.”

Nadine debated before turning so she was closer to him, lowering her voice incase anyone new had turned up. “I remember, before… A hug goes a long way?”

“Sometimes.” He nodded. “Especially if something makes her miss him more than normal.”

She gave his arm a squeeze of affection. “Stay by her side, we’ll get this figured out.”

==

The White House halls were only sparsely filled with people tonight, everyone else was already at the dinner. Blake had been in touch with Russell repeatedly, once to be angry and shout at him over the scene he’d caused on the seventh floor, then to apologize for shouting, and then finally to plan out how to take Julius Burton down once and for all. The call he’d sat in on between Elizabeth, Russell, and POTUS had been interesting. He knew the latter had been the director of the CIA, but mixed with the tradecraft skills he knew Elizabeth possessed and Russell’s special kind of cunning and deception, Blake walked away thankful that all three generally kept their moral compasses on good and true.

“Ready?” He leaned in, one hand on Elizabeth’s back. “You know we can do this without you being involved.”

“I’ve got to do this.” She stopped in the hall, turning to face him, and drawing a deep breath. “How do I look, Blake?”

He looked her over in her black dress. “Wonderful.”

His answer brought a momentary smile to her lips. “Good, because I feel like I’m about to unravel.”

Glancing along the hall, he placed both hands on her upper arms. “You’ll be fine. I’m right here, Russell and POTUS will be out in a second. He can’t do anything to you.”

“You’re right.” She exhaled.

“I know I am.” He grinned. “Let’s go get this over with and then go to a party, huh?” When she nodded, he led her around the final corner and right up to Burton.

The conversation and arrest went about as well as Blake figured it would. Burton had tried every trick in the book to discredit Elizabeth, from simply calling her crazy to hinting that the loss of Henry had made her ill suited to continue in her role. Blake was surprised he couldn’t taste blood with the amount of tongue biting he’d had to do to stay silent at her side through the whole thing. Once Burton was hauled away, Blake moved his hand to Elizabeth’s back again. “You okay?”

She nodded. “I just need a second and then we can go?”

“Sure.” He glanced around and caught Russell pointing at his own office. Leading her in, he pulled the door closed. “It’s over, you can breathe again.” He watched her do just that before she looked up at him.

“You too. I know all this bothered you too.”

“Yes.” He sucked in and then let out a breath of his own. “I am extremely glad it’s over. Come here.” He opened his arms. “I need it and I’m sure you do too.” He waited for her to step up to him and then gave her a hug, which she returned. “Let’s go party.”

==

Nadine set her glass on a passing tray and wound through the crowd until she made her way to Blake’s side. “A dance?”

“Absolutely.” He offered his hand and then led her to the dance floor.

“So, it’s over.”

“It is.” He sighed. “I think I’ll finally sleep tonight.”

“First time in a long time.” She tipped her head back to look up at him. “You’re a good guy, Blake. A good man. I’m proud of you for what you do, who you are, every day.” She watched him start to blush. “It’s late enough, how about you head home and enjoy Burton being gone?”

Blake smiled. “You know, I think that sounds like a wonderful idea.”


	12. Chapter 12

Letting himself in through the back door after his morning run, Blake stared down at the table covered in old photos. “What is…all this?”

“Will’s coming. For that interview, you know? I told you.” Elizabeth straightened up. “I told you, right?”

He chuckled. “Yes. Repeatedly. So, pictures?”

“Last year when he was here, before, you know, he commented that I have no pictures of him or he and I.”

He picked up a few. “Wow, Stevie is your clone.”

“Yeah, she is.”

“Which one are you going to put up?”

“I’m not sure. What do you think?”

“Which one makes you feel the happiest things? Put out pictures that remind you of happy things.” He put the ones he was holding back on the table. “I’m going to go shower and change. What time will they be in?”

==

Finishing up the dishes later that night, Blake heard soft plinking. He set the towel aside and softly walked through from the kitchen and peered around the corner, spotting Annie standing tucked in the darkness at the piano. He watched her for a few minutes as she studied the keys as she pressed them. “Have you ever played?” He finally asked, careful to keep his voice soft so she didn’t startle too much.

Annie yanked her hands back from the piano guiltily and shook her head.

“It’s okay.” He crossed the room to turn on the light and then slid onto the bench. “Here, have a seat.”

“Can you play?” She looked up at him, eyes wide, keeping planted where she stood.

“I can.” He smiled, touching the keys before staring low and running a dramatic scale up.

“Wow!”

“You like music?” He watched her nod. “Let’s see…” He played a few random bars as he decided what she might like and shifted so his foot could use the pedals. “Tell me if you like this.” He began to play, watching her face the whole time. After a few minutes, he stopped. “Would you like to try?” She nodded again and he patted the bench. “Have a seat and put your right hand up here. Thumb on this key, this one before the two black keys is always C no matter where you are. Then put this finger here and here; you have small hands so maybe I’ll do the pinky notes okay?” He covered her hand with his, his left keeping pace as they carefully plinked through a simple melody. Neither noticed when they gained an audience until they came to the end of their slow song and heard applause.

“Mummy! Daddy! Did you see me?” Annie was beaming as she ran to her parents. “Uncle Blake was showing me how to play!”

“It sounded wonderful, Honey.” Will gave her a hug, catching the stunned surprise on Blake’s face at the name. “It’s just Blake, though, not Uncle Blake.”

“Oh.” Her face fell a bit. “I though since he was here with Aunt Elizabeth?”

Blake understood, it was confusing for adults sometimes, he wasn’t sure how to put it in a way appropriate for a six-year-old. “You are welcome to call me Uncle Blake if you want.” He glanced up to Will and Sophie to see if they would object. “Would you like to help me play another song?”

“Sure!” She hurried back to the bench.

He pushed it back as far as his arms would allow, not bothering with pedals. “Stand here, I’ll do either side.” He lined her hand up on the keys again and showed her four notes to play. “Just keep playing them in that order, okay? Just that speed. I’m going to play all the others up here and down here.” He got her started and then waited a few bars before adding his music around it, blending her notes into what he was playing. When he finished, Annie ran to her parents again and Blake pulled the bench back to its normal spot, starting on a song he knew the adults would recognize.

After a few songs, he finally took a break to enjoy the glass of wine Elizabeth had brough in during the last song. Sophie had taken Annie up to bed, leaving just the Adams siblings in the room. “I heard her plinking in here earlier.” Blake stated. “It’s always nice to see kids curious about music.”

“She’d been eyeing that piano since we got here, Sophie had told her not to touch it.” Will commented.

“Ah. Well, I’m always happy to play.”

“He plays most nights if we’re home.” Elizabeth added from her spot curled on the couch. “Blake’s kind of taken it over as his piano.” She waited until both men joined her before carrying on. “I’m sure if she wants to tomorrow, Uncle Blake will happily show her some more.” She grinned at him.

“You’re really okay with that?” Will asked him.

“I don’t mind.” He sipped his wine quietly until Elizabeth excused herself to take care of something.

“She looks so much better than last spring.” Will said once it was just the two of them. “I wasn’t sure how long it would take for her to bounce back.”

“There’s good and bad days. And the holidays are coming up.”

“Well, hopefully we’ll be moved local by then with this new job and we can do Christmas together.”

“I think they’d all love that.”


	13. Chapter 13

“Any ideas about how the holidays will go?” Nadine asked Blake as he took a seat in her office for schedule review.

“Henry’s family has already invited Elizabeth and the kids north for Thanksgiving. I’m already blocking out a long weekend on the books for her to be away. We’ll be putting Cushing on call; his kids are grown, and he didn’t bury his spouse this year.”

“True. And you? Are you invited as well?”

“I didn’t ask? But her brother and his family are coming to the house for Christmas, I’ve been more focused on that already. Henry always got a live tree and they did decorations and everything as a family, big meal, the works. I think I would’ve preferred to have Thanksgiving at the house and sent them away for Christmas.” He sighed. “So, if you have any ideas…?”

She grinned and silently chuckled. “I’m about the wrong person to ask about Christmas plans, don’t you think?”

“Yeah.” An easy smile filled his face. “About as wrong as me doing it.”

“You could just point that out. Or. A friend of mine, she married a Catholic boy, pretty sure a lot of people in both religions rolled in their graves that day, but they simply do both together.” She combed back a section of curls that’d fallen forward, catching his unconvinced look. “Look at it this way, Henry would probably have approved.”

==

“Russell’s going to be insufferable all day.” Elizabeth commented in the SUV, they’d already stopped and voted that morning as soon as the polls opened; she’d be bombarded by reporters on the way out and Blake had stuck close once one reporter tried to pick up on a comment made several years ago about Elizabeth and Henry’s first date being to go and vote. He’d sent a signal to Matt who rushed them along even faster through the crowds. Election day was always long and hard, he was taking great strides to avoid anything else adding to the emotion of the day.

“Want me to run point this morning?”

“No. I suppose this was all my doing, might as well let him rant at me for a bit.”

“To what end? There’s no point in freaking out until the numbers start coming in. Oh, what are your plans tonight? Will you be headed to join POTUS for the watch party? I plan on hiding out in bed until the results come in.”

“I’ll probably go home too. If it goes sideways, I want a buffer between when Russell gets the news and when he tracks me down.”

==

The celebration was dying down at the Brickmore, Nadine wound her way through the remaining partiers, following the music still playing as she shook her head. How Blake was still belting out songs and playing at this point, she had no clue. The wide grin on his face told her he’d been drinking anything anyone was buying him, which she knew had been a lot; a good looking man at a piano on a night like this, she was floored there weren’t more women trying to lure him away. She made it to the piano and just watched him play for a bit, smiling herself when he turned toward her, almost serenading her as he finished the song.

“Just how much have you had to drink tonight, Blake?”

His blurry grin didn’t fade. “We won Ohio!” He voice was louder than normal.

“Yes, I know.” She laughed. “We need to get you home before someone else takes you.”

He leaned closer, failing to whisper. “I’ve had so many people come on to me!” He laughed. “This has been the best night and it’s not over.” He looked to his side and winked at a woman standing there eyeing him.

“Okay, time to get you in a cab, Blake.” She stepped closer and made to tug him away from the piano. He caught her off guard and pulled her down to sit beside him.

“Sing with me? Just one song?” He started playing again with his free hand as the other one stayed wrapped around her, holding her close.

Reaching across, Nadine stopped him. “No, it really is time to go. Come on.” She managed to get free of his embrace and get him to his feet, guiding him to the door and into a cab with strict instructions on where to drop him off before turning back to her own plans for the evening.

==

Elizabeth climbed out of the SUV and was greeted by the agents standing outside her door; she’d ended up at the watch party after all. “Evening.” She paused, swearing she could hear music. “What is that?”

“Mister Moran arrived home by cab about a half hour ago.” One of the agents spoke up. “It seems he spent the evening…celebrating?”

“Ah.” She chuckled. “I’ll go see how much celebrating then.” She let herself in and found Blake at the piano, singing, and playing with the happiest look on his face. “Wow!”

He stopped and just beamed at her.

“I’m thinking I have never seen you drunk before!” She kicked off her shoes and crossed to him. “I’m glad you’re happy, please don’t fall asleep at the piano, I’m going to bed.”

“Night!” He called out as the music picked back up again.

Elizabeth collapsed into bed to the sounds of him playing.


	14. Chapter 14

“I’m glad you agreed to come along instead of rattling around in that house for two days on your own.” Elizabeth spoke from her side of the SUV. The kids were in the back bickering. “And for sorting out the hotel. I don’t know what I was thinking agreeing to stay with Maureen over the holidays of all things. How exactly did you find rooms this late?”

He shrugged. “Everyone has a price, Elizabeth, you just have to figure out what it is.” He let a mischievous smirk show. “So, last minute details before you go into an information black out- Nadine confirmed that Cushing is on call if there are problems, but she’s running point and will keep me up to date.”

“You have to not work too!” Stevie interrupted. “Blake, you can’t just work the whole time!”

“I wasn’t planning on it. But I have to at least keep up on emails or I come back to the electronic example of why the phrase ‘going postal’ exists.”

“Fine.” She huffed.

“As I was saying.” He teasingly frowned back at Stevie. “I did move two of Monday morning’s meetings to Wednesday and Thursday next week, so just in case there are any weekend catastrophes, we have a buffer.” He put out his hand to take Elizabeth’s phone as the motorcade stopped at the hotel. “Family time, no more work. You can do this.”

==

“So, you live with them now?” Maureen asked as she came up behind Blake in the kitchen after the meal was finished.

He was clearing dishes and loading the dishwasher and turned, offering a disarming smile. “Yes. Not that it’s anyone’s business.”

“Henry loved her more than I think life itself.”

His smile faded. “I know. And she loves him.” He caught her surprise at his tense choice. “Thank you for hosting.” He shifted the subject. “I’ll bring it up to Elizabeth and maybe we can host something. Maybe in the summer? DC has some pretty amazing fireworks for the fourth and we have access to the best view there is, plus no crowds.”

“That, that sounds like fun actually.”

He pulled out his phone and typed quickly before putting it way. When he caught her curiosity, he explained. “If I don’t make reminders, I will forget.”

“Ah.”

==

“Did you really offer to Maureen about visiting DC next summer?” Elizabeth stepped out of the hotel bathroom drying her hair. “She mentioned it to me before we left.”

Blake was already propped against the headboard of his own bed, in his pajamas and scrolling on his phone. “I did.” He answered, distracted. “She seemed to be trying to take a dig at me, so I changed the subject.” He glanced up at her and then back to the screen. “I figured July is far enough away that we won’t have any control over what might happen, so if you wish to bow out later, we have time to create a crisis. Or, you know, you host and it’s fine and maybe Maureen cuts you a little slack.”

She scoffed. “Why didn’t you say something? I doubt she hates me any less now than she ever did.”

“Is she coming to the breakfast in the morning?”

“No, she and Tom are going to his family.”

He nodded. “She was definitely trying to make suggestions about me this afternoon.” He spotted the look of irritation on her face when she turned around and he pointed. “And that’s why I didn’t say anything earlier.” He waited for her to put the towel away and crawl onto her bed. “Just think of her like another diplomat you have to deal with. Tensions increase and decrease, but in theory, you’re all wanting the same thing.”

“Like North Korea?” She smirked.

“Not North Korea. Perhaps more like Avdonin. He’s a good guy way down somewhere, right?”

“Somewhere.”

“So just look at Maureen as that. Deal with her on occasion, make peace as best you can, move on to the next problem.”

“How’s the office?”

He pulled his phone to his chest just in case, shooting her a look. “Nothing for you to know. Oh, Nadine did text me a personal message to you though. She says Happy Thanksgiving and she hopes you are enjoying your time with your family.”

“That sounds…ominous. She’s not working, is she? Because I meant it that I expected everyone to take time off.”

“I have verified they are all doing as they are told. Jay did a trial run with Abby of a joint holiday for Chloe, they are wanting to have just one Christmas, which is sweet, and the rest of us fully intend for him to get to pull it off, so we will be diverting all disasters away from Jay for that week so he doesn’t get sucked into anything. Matt and Daisy are with their respective families, no doubt hiding in empty rooms texting one another every chance they get. And Nadine has a friends-giving weekend planned with a variety of friends from her dance days including, unfortunately according to her, her ex-husband, but also, and she seemed to be looking forward to this more, another ex that remained unnamed but included a very telling blush.”

The entire time he spoke, Elizabeth simply stared at him, mouth open. “My staff tells me nothing.”

“No, we do not.”

“Nadine was married?”

“Yes, she was.”

“Huh.” She sank back against the pillows.

He placed his phone on the table between the beds. “Ready?” He reached for the light switch.

“Yep.”


	15. Chapter 15

“Blake!” Nadine called out to him from her office as he walked past. “I just got a call from Adele, Russell Jackson was just taken by ambulance to the hospital, he had a heart attack in his office. Stevie was with him. Did you know she was going up there?”

“She was looking for a recommendation to law school.” His mind began to race. “How is she?”

“The Secretary and President came in, Stevie started CPR, that’s all I know. Law school?”

“She applied to Harvard, went to him for a letter.”

Nadine scoffed. “Yale wasn’t good enough? I could’ve gotten her in without breaking a sweat.”

“She wants to get in on her own merits.”

“But with a letter from Russell.”

“I have opted to stay out of it. And what’s wrong with Harvard? I quite enjoyed it. I’ll call and see about updates on Russell’s condition and track down my various McCords and see how they are handling the excitement.”

“You do that.” She smirked as he rushed out again.

==

Blake opened the front door, greeting Will and his family with a grin. “Come in!”

Annie tackled him in a hug. “Uncle Blake! Will you play the piano with me again?!”

Sophie laughed, tugging her daughter back. “Honey, we’re not even in the door yet! I’m sorry, she’s been talking about it almost every day since we were here last.”

“It’s okay.”

Will parked their bags out of the way. “So, Liz here?” He looked around.

“No, unfortunately she had to go to the White House for a meeting, but she’ll be back as soon as it’s over.” He led them toward the kitchen. “She was upset when I told her the meeting had been scheduled though, she wanted to be here when you guys arrived.”

“Yeah, well, we’re familiar with how her life is.” Will brushed off.

Blake turned to Annie. “Alison is upstairs working on some new designs, why don’t you head up and see if she needs any help?” He smiled as she excitedly raced up the stairs. “There was something I wanted to talk to you two about.” He turned back to Will and Sophie. “Now that you live close by. My schedule is infinitely more predictable than Elizabeth’s, I was wondering how you would feel about me gifting Annie with piano lessons? It would probably have to be on the weekends. I was thinking of doing it as like an ongoing Christmas present.”

The couple exchanged a look before Sophie answered. “Are you sure? She can be a handful. And… we don’t have a piano at home, so I’m not sure how she would be able to practice.”

“I’d thought of that. If you were up for it, I thought I could get a small keyboard and that would be the gift she unwraps. And it would be kind of a gift to me as well, she’s so sweet and I think she has a real ear for music.”

Sophie exchanged another look with Will. “Sure. It sounds great.”

Before he could acknowledge her, his phone beeped. He pulled it out. “Elizabeth’s on her way back.”

“You track her?” Wil laughed.

“Kind of.” He shrugged before realizing he needed to elaborate. “If I’m not with her, then her security tells me anytime they’re on the move. Any reroute, delay, they send me a message.”

“That’s… either really creepy or something else.” He chuckled.

“I’m going to take our things up.” Sophie walked back toward the door.

==

Blake shut of his alarm and smiled at what he suspected was coming. Christmas was probably he one day a year where his normal four thirty wake-up time was going to pay off. Silently, he gathered a few things he’d need and crept downstairs, only turning on the lights he absolutely needed to get to work adding last minute gifts under the tree and then starting on breakfast. As the smell of cinnamon rolls and quiche started to fill the kitchen, he finished up his coffee, not surprised as he heard the stairs creek off the living room.

Creeping through, he grinned at the sight of Annie trying to check the tree from the steps. “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, Uncle Blake. That’s a lot of presents!”

“It is.” He whispered. “But we can’t touch them until everyone comes down. You want to help me finish making breakfast first?”

“Sure!” She followed him into the kitchen where he carried a chair over so she’d be tall enough to see what he was doing. Together, they finished getting the food made and then Blake pulled out some other ingredients.

“I have a special treat and if we make it now, we’ll be able to eat it this afternoon. It’s always best fresh.”

“What is it?”

“Fudge. Have you ever made fudge?” She shook her head. “Well, I make it special. You see, we needed to break up bits of candy canes for this fudge. Normally I do it myself, but I already had some friends help me.” He pulled out a bag of pulverized candy cane bits. “The most important step is to be very patient, if we go too fast or try to hurry it, then everything burns, and no one will want burnt fudge.”

When his phone beeped as they were finishing, Annie looked at him apprehensively. “Do you have to leave?”

“Oh, no. It’s just reminding me of the time. I wanted to make sure I didn’t wake anyone up too early, but now it’s an okay time of we make noise or something.” And idea crossed his mind. “What if we made a little noise and woke everyone up? I think you’ve been very patient this morning.” He helped her off the chair and led the way to the living room. “Have a seat.” He sat in the middle of the piano bench and helped her get settled as well. “How about some Christmas songs?”

==

After two days of festivities, the house was finally quiet. Elizabeth flipped off lights as she moved through the first floor, checking for any remaining wrapping paper or dishes before heading upstairs. Down the hall, she could see light from Blake’s partially open bedroom, so she moved to the doorway. He was propped up on his bed, an earbud in one ear as he poured over a magazine of some kind in his lap. “Hey, you.” When his eyes moved to her, she smiled. “I’m surprised you’re not totally wiped out by now.”

He made a small huff. “I’ll probably fall asleep in a bit. The accidental nap this afternoon helped.” Somehow, he’d dozed off slumped on the couch in the den and woke up to find Annie asleep against him. “I think everyone had a good time.”

“They did. I can’t believe how much Annie loves you, you’re so good with her.” Elizabeth moved from leaning against the door frame to sitting on the bed, deciding the conversation was going to carry on for more than a few sentences.

“She’s pretty awesome. Kids are great, I actually subsidized my college time by offering piano lessons when I was at Harvard. But the time I was at UVA, I was juggling a lot more and never got around to setting something up.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“Not too many people expect me to enjoy being around kids, I’m not sure why.”

“Who knows.” She sighed. “Will stopped me on their way out one last time and asked about the keyboard.”

“I did talk to them about it.”

“I know. He was under the impression it would be a small, fairly cheap thing not a full-size keyboard.”

“I- I didn’t think it would matter.”

“It doesn’t.” She stood again. “Get some sleep, Blake. You’ve earned it.”


	16. Chapter 16

“Do you know how many photo ops they’re wanting to schedule this week? I mean, how is anything supposed to get done with a schedule like this? I have no idea how I’m going to balance everything the White House wants you to attend with all our normal regular commitments, clearly they don’t think anyone needs sleep.” Blake drew a breath, giving Elizabeth an opportunity to cut in.

“Blake. We’ll fit in what we can and then make excuses for the rest.”

“Yeah, yeah, of course… I need to head in. It’s going to be a madhouse.”

“Blake!” She called out, failing to get him to stop before he darted out the door.

“Is Blake okay?” Alison carefully came in. “He seems a bit…”

“He’ll be fine. He’s just a little stressed right now is all.”

“This is totally like Twilight Zone, you’re cool, calm, and collected and Blake’s the one rushing around in a panic.”

“Yeah. And I have a feeling it’ll be Blake pulling all nighters this week. There’s a lot of protocol and stuff that goes into this week and they get testy, he likes to keep in touch with the protocol office. He’s also a little worried about the parade, Conrad asked me to walk it with him and it’s turning into a two-mile nightmare.” Alison gave her a confused look and Elizabeth chuckled. “Blake is worried about quite a few things, one of which is my safety walking the parade route.”

“Oh. Is there a reason to be worried?”

“I think it’s one of the most secure events there is. Conrad will have his fleet of agents and cars, I’ll have mine. There haven’t been any threats of any merit, so no more than any other day. It’ll be fine, I just think he’s getting overwhelmed with all of it.”

“Okay. Well, keep an eye on him, Mom.”

“I will, Noodle.”

==

“Nadine, I need your help.” Elizabeth stepped into her chief of staff’s office days later. “I have to go to the White House; can you please look after Blake? I think he’s already had too much coffee today, this whole inauguration week has been winding him up and… I think he needs a lot of supervision today.”

“Okay.”

“I sent him to sign for something at the Port of Baltimore, Matt’s dealing with the gifts. I advise not letting Blake back into the conference room until it’s been cleared?”

“I’ll look after him.” She assured. “Ma’am?”

“Yeah.”

“He was here before me again this morning…”

“I think he’s been staying here overnight. Like I said, it’s been winding him up. If you see any chance to send him off on even the tiniest task to get him away from the office, do it.” She sighed. “It’s an hour or more each way to the Port, I’m hoping that will give him some time to chill.”

“Ha. Because Blake behind the wheel in traffic when he’s already stressed out will just calm him right down.”

Her comment made Elizabeth hesitate. “Maybe I should have made him take some of my security. I mean, technically it’s business.”

“Pretty gray area there, Ma’am.”

“Yeah. Keep an eye on him.”

“Will do.”

==

Nadine did her best all day to keep track of Blake. When he called her about the protesters, she was almost headed for her own car to go to him until she realized how silly that would be. Once she’d gotten him calmed down and set on a course to clean up and pull himself together, she focused on keeping the seventh floor ticking along without him there.

The whole horse thing was ridiculous, who sent a live animal anymore as a gift? She could only shake her head as she tracked down Daisy to begin figuring out how the protesters even knew Blake was at the Port in the first place.

Once the horse situation was sorted, Nadine walked with Blake as he gathered his things to leave. “I’m sorry it’s been a rough week for you.”

He seemed surprised. “I- thanks. I keep reminding myself I just have to get through today and then life goes back to normal.” He pulled on his coat and turned to head down to meet the DS agents he was riding to the parade staring point with.

She eyed him. “You got a bit attached to the horse. Have you been to the farm at all?”

It seemed to take him a second to follow her question. “Oh, no. It’s been so busy…”

“Perhaps you should suggest it. The Secretary has horses, maybe you could transfer some of that attachment to one of them?” She patted his arm. “Talk to her, take a long weekend. It might do everyone some good to get away after what’s been going on.” She walked with him all the way to the SUV. “Think about it. I’ll see you after the parade.”

Climbing into the SUV, Blake considered Nadine’s suggestion as he rode the short distance to the meeting point.

“Matt says they’ve arrived now.” The driver stated. “We’ll be there in about two minutes.”

“Good.” He checked his phone one last time before tucking it away. When the vehicle stopped, he climbed out and headed for the one in front, opening the door. “Ready for this?”

Elizabeth studied him. “You know you don’t have to walk with me, right? I can walk with Conrad and Lydia.”

Blake shook his head. “By your side, always.”

She rolled her eyes at him but took his hand when he offered it and let him help her out.

“Hey.” He caught her arm gently, stopping her from heading straight for the limo he knew the Dalton’s were waiting in. “I’m sorry if my freaking out this week has made life harder for you.”

“You were fine, I’m glad you’re okay.”

He watched her head to the limo, greeting POTUS and FLOTUS when they got out. He hung back as he always did, letting them talk until it was time to start walking and Elizabeth called him over. “How many secret service are here?” He couldn’t help asking.

Elizabeth laughed. “All of them, between he and Theresa Hurst.” She looked around. “And I think all of Diplomatic Security are here too.” She followed Blake as he headed for the point where they would officially start the walk, surrounded by the agents. “Lots of smiling and waving today.”

“The coat was a good choice, Elizabeth, but are you sure it’s warm enough?”

“Once we’re moving, I’ll be fine.” She hooked one hand around his elbow. “And you’ll be right here, by my side.”


	17. Chapter 17

Blake looked around the entry as he helped Elizabeth out of her coat at the coat check. It’d been years since he’d been near UVA’s campus or around any of the staff and even then, he’d been a lowly student at the time. “Ready?” He asked as he received the claim tickets and turned back to her.

“To be celebrated for an award I _might_ get but don’t think I deserve? Sure, let’s do this.” She leaned into his side and let him guide her into the main room, his arm at her waist.

“You always deserve being celebrated.” He softly responded, making her laugh.

“You are so corny.” She shook her head, spotting one of the hostesses of the evening.

“Madam Secretary, it’s such an honor to have you here tonight.”

“It’s a pleasure and are you kidding, we both attended UVA, so this is a real treat.” She touched Blake’s arm. “I’m sorry, this is my assistant, Blake Moran; this is Nelly Conlon.”

Blake recognized the name. “I do believe it was your office I spoke to about tonight.” He offered his hand to her.

“Yes, I do believe so.” She turned her attention back to Elizabeth. “I heard about your husband last year, how heartbreaking to lose him so suddenly. How have you been doing?”

“Uh, yes, it was sudden and unexpected, but I’ve been doing better every day. And I have great support of my family and I work with great people who step in to help when I’ve needed it.”

“I see. It is good to have a good support network.”

Blake excused himself to find drinks, coming back just as Nelly moved on to another guest. “She seems nice.”

When Elizabeth brought her attention to him, he processed her fake, slightly freaked out smile. “Is there something online about my legs?”

“I- I… Daisy has been working extremely hard the last few days to manage all discussion of that article. Perhaps she is the one to talk to?” He avoided.

“First my wax face, then my blouse, and now my legs? You’d think I’d done a Playboy center.”

He had no idea how to respond to that and was thankful when Nelly returned, bringing someone with her she was insisting Elizabeth meet. The man seemed excessively dull, even to him with his finance background. The topic itself was interesting enough, and he was familiar with it, but the man was…not. He listened calming for a minute before wrapping his arm around Elizabeth to stop her from carrying on drinking anything more. She had a fairly high tolerance, but pacing was important. Once Nelly vanished with Boseman, he turned so they were face to face. “Breathe. A few hours and we’re through this. I will keep track of the time and as soon as it’s socially acceptable, I’ll create a crisis and we’ll go.”

“Deal.” She lifted the glass again.

“You’re plan to get through this is to get drunk, isn’t it?”

“Bingo.” She handed him her empty glass. “Sorry. You scheduled it.” She walked toward the bar.

“Yes, yes I did.” He spoke to himself. “I’m rethinking that now.”

==

The only upside, if there was one, to the UVA event was that the ride back to Georgetown was filled with Elizabeth giggling and trying to amuse everyone else in the car. Blake had accepted his fate and simply kept plying her with fresh alcohol until they’d been present long enough to not start an incident by being called away. He helped her into the house, accepting that the night was early enough and the issues on the table big enough that curbing her just yet wasn’t something he needed to tackle so he poured them both fresh drinks and let her rant about whatever came to her mind.

“Hey, maybe if I show just a little more leg, UVA will get another Nobel Prize.” She was leaned back in her chair. Blake wasn’t sure how to respond, it was no secret that Elizabeth hated having her looks be the center of attention. Ali and Jason coming in derailed whatever response he would have tried to give.

“Are you guys drunk?” Jason looked between them.

Blake waved at Elizabeth. “Only some of us.”

“You looked smokin’ hot in the magazine, Mom.” Ali said.

“Alison.” Blake tried, shaking his head.

“Oh my god! Even in my own house I’m appraised like a show pony!” Elizabeth groaned.

“All I said was you looked hot.” Ali defended.

Jason started to comment, but Blake cut him off with a glare.

“I’m going to bed.” Elizabeth stormed upstairs.

“What’s the big deal about the magazine?” Ali asked Blake. “I didn’t write it.”

“Just, it’s late, both of you need to be in bed.” He cleared up their glasses before heading up to find Elizabeth. “Hey.” He knocked on the partly open door. “Talk to me.” The bathroom door was shut, so he assumed she was in there.

“I’m a failure. I can’t do my job, I can’t talk to my kids without blowing up, I can’t…” Her voice broke. “I’m so tired.” The door opened and he watched her come out in pajamas. “Sometimes I wonder what Henry would tell me on nights like this. Would he have kept me from falling apart or… I don’t know…” She sat on the bed and looked up at him. “It’s been almost a year.”

“I know.”

“Should I take time off?”

“That’s up to you. No one will think anything if you do.”

“Yeah.”

“For what it’s worth, not everyone matters. Their opinions I mean. The people whose opinions do matter, they don’t think anything of that article. It doesn’t make you less. You’re still driven, smart, successful…. Awesome.” When she didn’t respond, he backed away from the doorway and went and changed, returning to find her in the same spot.

“You came back.” Her voice was soft.

“I will always come back.” He was startled when she burst into tears. “Hey.” He rushed to her side, unsure what he’d done but still holding her when she leaned into him. “It’s okay.” When her crying eased, he spoke again. “Talk to me, what’s wrong?”

“Henry said he would always come for me.” He could feel her shaking.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“I know.” She sniffled and wiped her face. “Would you… maybe it’s because of the last few days or tonight or, I don’t know, the alcohol, but would you… Would you stay in here?” Her gaze didn’t meet his and he realized she was nervous to ask.

“Yes, if that’s what you need.” He watched her process his answer, maybe a bit surprised he’d agreed, before standing and rounding the bed, pulling the covers back. Copying her on the other side, Blake got somewhat comfortable and let her curl into him, the room lapsed into silence until he thought she was asleep.

“How long after being widowed is enough time before dating?” She whispered.

“I-” He had no idea where that came from. “Where did that question come from?”

She shrugged against him. “At the party. Someone asked while you were getting drinks if I was back into dating now that I was single. Actually… They asked how long I’d waited before I had started dating after Henry died, implying I’d already finished waiting.”

He considered that for a few minutes. Being with her day in and day out, he knew there was a good chance it would be a long time, if ever, before she took that step. “You still wear your wedding rings. Honestly, from what little I know, most widows or widowers start dating, sometimes even before they’re truly ready, because they’re lonely and just want companionship. Some only ever want companionship and never look for romance again because they never stop loving their spouse.”

“Oh.” The silence filled the room again. “I get that… But is it fair?”

“Fair?”

“If they are just with someone for the companionship, is it fair to the other person if they want more?”

“I don’t have an answer to that. I guess it has to be a mutual arrangement, but lots of people do it. You can have platonic relationships, deep friendships that provide that comfort and connection without crossing into romantic. That’s common.”

He was dozing off when she whispered again. “Is that what we have?”

He hummed; not awake enough to process what she’d asked.


	18. Chapter 18

“The whole day is blocked off; it would have to be actual nuclear war for either of us to miss it.” Blake was talking to Alison as they readied for the day. “As soon as they say they’re doing tickets, let me know, we’ll find out who all wants to come and how many more seats we need.”

“Other people? I thought it would just be you and Mom, and Jason and Stevie.”

“Well, your Uncle Will asked already, so I think he wants to see you graduate. It’s a big deal. And a few people at work asked too.”

That seemed to surprise Alison. “Really?”

“Really. The senior staff want to be able to be there if we can get enough seats.”

“I’m sure they’ll have something out this week. Oh, the money for the cap and gown is due by the end of the week.”

Blake set his coffee down. “Well, we’re headed overseas, I think your Mom has an envelope on her desk with the money though.” He watched her vanish to find it, returning a few minutes later. “Got it?”

“Yeah, found it. Think she’d not freak out much if I asked for more to get something that said ‘senior’ on it?” She gave him a hopeful look.

“How much more?”

“Thirty dollars. Everyone was talking about getting these shirts and then everyone else signing them.”

“Tell you what.” He pulled out his wallet. “Here you go.”

“Really?” She bounced, giving him a hug. “Thanks Blake!” She crammed the bills into her bag. “So, the whole team is going to Singapore?”

“No.” Elizabeth answered as she came down the stairs.

“Wow, Mom! That dress is… aren’t you going to be cold today?”

“I’ll have my coat this morning, but it’s eighty-four in Singapore.” She grinned. “And contrary to some people’s opinions…” She shot a look at Blake. “Sometimes it’s just easier to dress for where I’m headed instead of changing on the plane.”

“It’s an entire day of flying.” He started to rehash the argument.

“I know. I hear you.” She turned her attention back to her daughter. “Only Blake and I are going, which I’m starting to regret already.” She grinned at him.

“But you’ll get some down time?” Alison asked. “You can’t just be going to sit in a stuffy government building the entire time.”

“I’m going for work, Noodle. Now, Stevie will be here, try not to drive her too crazy, would you?”

“I promise.” Ali agreed.

“I make no such promises!” Jason announced as he rushed through the kitchen. “Have a fun trip!”

The front door slammed, plunging the house into silence a beat. “Henry’s the one who wanted three.” She held a straight face for a moment before she smirked.

“Of course.”

==

Blake stretched his legs across the seats and settled in, paperwork on the table and his laptop on his lap. “Doesn’t Alison have a spring formal coming up?” He asked.

Elizabeth was across the aisle working. “Next month, I think. Then her senior prom… I can’t believe my baby girl is graduation high school. Henry would’ve been so proud of her.”

“She’s worked hard, especially this year. Is she going to need to go dress shopping for either dance?”

“Um, I think she’s making one of them? I should probably ask her before it gets too close. I haven’t heard her giggling about any boys lately so maybe she’s going with friends.”

“Okay.”

Elizabeth paused and then shut the binder she’d been reading. “Explain that. That ‘okay’ wasn’t a normal okay, it was an ‘I’m missing something’ okay.”

“Elizabeth, it’s nothing.” He glanced up to see she wasn’t buying it. “I think there’s the possibility of a boy. She and Jason were having a bit of an argument, I guess Jason knows who the boy is and doesn’t like him. I only know because I’ve spent years eavesdropping on you and have a lot of practice picking up on the little things.”

She laughed. “She likes him?”

“Seems to. Do not pester her about it, it will only cause a fight.”

“Fine.” She huffed. “You already told me not to pester Stevie, I’m running out of people here.”

“Oh, I talked to her last weekend. You were out with Jason and she stopped by. I think I’ve worked out the problem on the whole delayed engagement situation.”

“And?”

“And I think she’s having a hard time because Henry won’t be there to walk her down the aisle. Especially since it hasn’t even been a year yet. She thinks it’s wrong to be happy and get married when she feels she should still be sad over losing him.”

“There’s no rule on how long that takes. She can be happy again and move on with life, he wouldn’t want her to wallow in it forever.”

He arched a brow. “So, it’s okay to tell her that, but not you?”

“I’m…doing better… I’m dealing with it.” She drew a breath. “Aren’t I?”

“You’re getting there.”

“That’s something, right? Do you think it would help…Maybe I should try and move on with my personal life?”

“Is that what you want?”

“I don’t know.”

“It’s not the same… Losing your dad versus your spouse.” He pointed out gently. “You had to go through not having yours there when you got married, maybe you should remind her that you know how it feels walking down the aisle anyway.”

“I didn’t. Walk down the aisle, we went to the Justice of the Peace. I had no family really except Will, Henry was about to deploy. But you’re right, I did struggle with not having my parents around for that stage in my life.” She sighed. “I wasn’t sure I was ready years after they died… I was Jason’s age then. Now my kids have to do all that growing up without their father.”

“But they have you, and they’re strong because you _and Henry_ showed them how to be strong. They’ll be okay.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” After a few minutes, she turned her attention back to the binder.

Blake let his mind wander for a bit, thinking about if Henry hadn’t died, how would they all be doing, what would they be doing. How many little things might have been different if that one outcome had changed?

==

“This palace is…wow.” Blake spoke under his breath as he tried to take it all in.

When they got to a door, the assistant put her hand up. “Only the Secretary, please. The President has asked that this be a private negotiation.”

“That’s fine.” Elizabeth turned to him. “You can wait with security.”

“Ma’am. I don’t think-”

“It’s what he’s asked, it’s fine. You stay with them.” She caught his frown. “Yes, it’s…unusual, but it’s not unheard of.”

“Ma’am.” He tried again. He agreed with the kids’ assessments about how crazy President Andrada appeared to be.

“It’s a direct order, Blake.”

“I understand.” He backed up a step, watching her vanish into the next room and the door closing. Alone, he turned back to the agents. “We’re on a schedule, no matter what, we have to make Singapore on time.” Pulling out his phone, he walked further down the hall, exchanging messages with Nadine and Jay on a variety of things they had going on. He was caught up in reading about Jay’s lunch encounter with someone on the second floor when Matt shouting his name drew his attention. “What?” He turned, watching as Matt and the other agent were rushing toward him, Elizabeth between them. “What’s going on?”

“We have to go.” Was Matt’s only answer. He rushed forward to lead the way out, letting Blake take his place next to her. Nothing more was said until they were inside the SUV and Blake realized that the agents were standing outside their doors as if they were waiting.

“What happened?” He turned to her, confused. It was then that he caught sight of her hand. “You’re bleeding.” He moved it from her lap. “You’ll get it on your dress.”

“It’s not all mine.” Her voice waivered as she spoke. “Some of it is Andrada’s.” Her eyes met his for a second. “I punched him.”

He still was confused, he wondered if the agents could tell him more, but they still hadn’t come in yet.

“I think they’re giving me a second… To tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

“He… he groped me. He…” Her voice caught on whatever she was going to say next.

“Okay.” Blake steadied himself, focusing on the first thing. “Do we have everything?”

“Yes. Security picked up all my stuff.”

“Then let’s get out of here.” He knocked on the window, spurring them into climbing in and driving away from that place. “How is your hand? Do you need x-rays?”

“It’s not broken, I’m fine.” She brushed off. “As soon as we get to the hotel, I need a SVTC with POTUS. They need to hear what happ… What happened, from me.”

“I might agree with that, but I think you need to wrap your head around what happened to you first. It’s only like ten minutes till we’re there, but you aren’t going to want to fall apart on a call with him.”

“I know, Blake, but ten minutes isn’t going to do it either.” She snapped. “He played grab-ass, it’s not like he did anything worse, we have to save this Interchange deal, my little issues can’t get in the way of that.”

He gaped, she’d never used a tone so heated at him before and that, mixed with her words, had him backing off the topic. He didn’t try to address it again until they were in the air and headed back to DC, the Singapore trip postposed indefinitely. Assembling a small semblance of a meal, Blake nervously sat at the table across from her and studied her. Her coat was draped over her and she was looking out the window. “I’m sorry.” He started. “I’m sorry you had to experience that, I’m sorry I was insensitive and I’m…sorry everything has fallen apart.”

“It’s the way of the world, though. Agreements fall apart… feelings get hurt… People take what they want from whoever they wish to take it from.”

He wasn’t sure how to respond to that, so he simply pushed the food across the table. “Please have something to eat? You’ve barely eaten anything since we left, and I know you’re going to jump right back in once we get home.” He thought she’d argue, but after a moment, she straightened up.

“You have to eat too, Blake.”

“I will.”

After a few bites, she began pushing the food around. “It’s been a long time since someone’s put their hands on me without my permission. You know, except for when it was for my safety. One advantage, I suppose, of my security is there’s been a lot less of those ‘accidental’ brushes so they can touch my ass or my breast or something.” She glanced up and caught the look of horror on Blake’s face. “Those guys exist, Blake. Not everyone is good like you.”

“I- I know that, but you used the word ‘less’ which implies that it….”

“Still happens? Yeah. Mostly if they catch me on my own somewhere, but some are bolder than others. It’s… a fact of the world. Some are lucky enough to only suffer the small stuff, which is plenty scary and a major violation anyway, but…” She sighed, working on her food some more. “Some go through so much worse than a guy getting handsy.” Pushing the food away, she pulled her coat back up. “Some guys don’t take well to a girl who stands up to them.”

“Sounds like you speak from experience.” It slipped out before he could stop it. “I’m- I’m so sorry!”

“It’s okay.” She whispered and then sighed. “It wasn’t something I really kept a secret; Henry knew. Years went by and I moved on, but I guess today just isn’t one of those days where I can speak frankly about it without falling apart.”

“Then don’t. You don’t owe me anything, least of all an explanation.”

She thought about that. He was right, she didn’t owe him an explanation about anything, not even what happened in that room, but who else was she going to talk to? He wouldn’t push, but maybe she needed to push herself a bit, so this didn’t drag her down. “He wanted to call be Elizabeth but then denied me permission to call him by his first name. A classic tactic to create a power imbalance in the situation. Then he asked me to sit but stood over me, behind me… unsettling me. There were little things, the way he moved or sat, the way he stepped into my personal space.” She took a breath. “The way he said I was sexy.” His voice played over in his mind. “I was uncomfortable, and I fled the situation. I moved away to put some distance between us, and he came up behind me.” She looked at Blake. “I suspected what he was doing.”

“You shouldn’t have had to worry about a world leader assaulting you.” He reached across the table and took her hand. “You shouldn’t have to worry about anyone assaulting you. We have a long flight back, why don’t you rest and then, if you, want, later you can talk to me about anything that might cross your mind.”

==

Blake headed straight for the conference room when he got back to the seventh floor, the rest of the senior staff was already in there. “Any news on Andrada?”

All four of them turned to him. “Is she okay?” Nadine asked in return.

“She will be. She talked off and on during the flight back. She’s gone home to clean up and change, but she’ll be in soon. We can discuss anything else later.”

“Of course.”

“Well, Andrada’s already put out pictures of himself in a nose splint, two black eyes, the works. He hasn’t held back. His cover story is that he broke his nose at the gym by a sparring partner named Cobra.” Daisy started.

“If Russell calls her Cobra, I’ll be the one throwing the next punch.” Blake grumbled, raising everyone’s brows. “Sorry, he already took some shots with ‘Sugar Ray McCord’.”

“He even trotted out some guy to pretend to be his sparring partner, complete with fake black eye as well.” Daisy carried on, passing him her laptop.

“Unless he actually let Andrada kick him in the face.”

“When are we going to make a statement about what really happened?” Matt interrupted their back and forth.

“If by we, you mean the Secretary, why don’t you ask her?” Nadine spoke as she looked out into the outer office at their boss walking in.

“Ma’am.” Blake cut Matt off, shutting the laptop so she couldn’t see the screen. “We were just getting up to speed.”

“We need to figure out how to get the Singapore talks back on track. And we aren’t going to make any of this about me, it’s his word against mine, we know how that ends. Lives are at stake here and my momentary discomfort can’t jeopardize that.” She took her coffee and vanished into her office.

“I just thought…” Daisy started.

“You didn’t.” Blake cut her off this time. “It was a really long flight. If she wants to let it go, then let it go.” He exchanged a look with Nadine and knew she’d be hunting him down later for more details.

==

“Long flight?” Nadine asked when Blake finally found himself in her office later, door closed so they could talk freely. “Something tells me there’s more going on in all this than whatever happened in that room.”

“Yes and no.” He huffed, debating. “Can I tell you something, totally in confidence? I… just need to, I don’t know, say it out loud before I say it in the wrong place.”

“You can tell me anything, Blake.” She rounded her desk to sit directly across from him. “What’s up?”

“I understand what it feels like to get assaulted, harassed. As conceited as it sounds, I know people sometimes think I’m a good-looking guy, I pride myself in my appearance, but some of that attention isn’t always positive or…wanted. Welcome. And it’s nothing new, really. Being brushed against in a crowd but then I realize it was intentional so they could touch my ass or my…” He felt a blush start on his neck. “Other touching that looks harmless but is uncomfortable. Standing too close, then the more obvious things like making a pass at me or trying to come on to me. Sometimes they don’t always take no for an answer right away.” He trailed off, risking a look up at Nadine after a moment. “The conversation on the plane was one sided and private, but I wanted so bad to say I understood, maybe a little, but I didn’t want to make it about me or diminish the current issue with my past problems and I know it’s different for a guy.”

“How?” Her question made his head shoot up. “How is a guy getting felt up any different than a woman experiencing it? It’s still an invasion of your person and it’s still dehumanizing.” She shook her head. “Blake. I’m so sorry that you experience these things and feel like you have to suck it up because… you’re a guy? Because that makes you not have feelings?” She pursed her lips together and studied him. “Have you ever talked to someone and dealt with things that happen?”

“No.”

“I really think you should. No one should have to deal with that. You’re one of the good ones, I hate the idea of you suffering in silence because of some archaic idea that men can’t be assaulted or feel violated. And, maybe, you should tell the Secretary. It’s very isolating sometimes. It’s one thing to know you’re not the only person who’s been violated, but it’s another to feel isolated because no one talks about it.” She saw a hint of comprehension creep into his eyes. “A story for another day and another place, perhaps.” She waved off whatever comment he was about to make. “Washington has always been a man’s game, but times are changing. We do all have to lean on one another and stick together to make that change though.”

==

It was late by the time Blake heard the front door open and close. He’d come home while Elizabeth had been in meetings at the White House. Moving to the top of the front stairs, he watched and waited as she dumped her things and headed toward the kitchen. “Elizabeth.” He made himself known.

He could see how exhausted she was when she looked up at him. “Hey. Long day.”

Following her to the kitchen, he stopped her. “I know it’s been a long day. A long few days. And I’m sorry for how much this hurts you. I’m sorry if anything I said hurt you, it wasn’t my intention.”

“I know.” She leaned into him, ready for a hug. When his arms wrapped around her, she stayed there. “I’m sorry too, for being short with you. It wasn’t fair. I could stay like this all night.”

“Don’t fall asleep standing up.” He laughed, putting her back upright. “Did you eat any dinner?”

“No. How about cereal?”

“Okay.” He started the process. “So, how were the meetings?”

“We’re getting a new defense deal; Andrada will be in DC tomorrow. And Singapore is back on next month.” She saw him freeze at the statement. “Relax, he isn’t getting any alone time with me this time. We’ll be at the White House and he’ll be on camera much of the time. I’m not sure he’d be stupid enough to try for a second hit to his nose so soon anyway.”

“The man is a menace.”

“Well, we know I’m part of a long line of women he assaulted, I’m not anyone special in that regard.”

“Do you think… Maybe we could talk sometime when there’s no work looming over us? Maybe we could have a weekend at the farm?” He tried to keep the anxiety over asking off his face but had a feeling he failed.

“Sure, Blake. If you can fit it in, it probably wouldn’t hurt to have a weekend away. Is there anything you want to talk about that can’t wait?”

“Uh, no.” He shook his head. He didn’t want to get into it tonight.


	19. Chapter 19

They’d made a four-day workweek a few weeks later and headed off to the farm on a Friday morning. Despite prodding and begging from Elizabeth, the kids all insisted they had to stay in the city for one reason or another and, in the end, she given in with a pout.

Blake had his bag packed with everything he would need to keep in touch with the office remotely, but was hoping to find a bit of peace, which Nadine had assured him he would find out in the country.

They pulled in just after lunch and Blake went right to unpacking the food and other things they’d brought, he’d never really had a look at the place when he’d been out before, so it was all a bit new. Elizabeth gave him a quick tour, introduced him to the horses, and promised a few rides before they had to go back. He found himself later simply sitting out back in a chair, staring across the field, not a single sound of a car or anything else he was accustomed to.

“It’s peaceful out here.” Elizabeth spoke, pulling a chair beside his. “I planned to move back after my time at State’s over.”

“Planned?”

“I don’t know. I’ll be all alone, you know? Kids will be gone, no Henry. It seems weird having this big place to myself. I’m not sure I want to stay in Georgetown either though. Both feel like home, but they’re too big for one person.” She laughed. “That’s assuming my kids all move out I guess.”

“What do you want?”

“I love my horses. I love being out, away from the crazy. I think I love it more now than I did before. DC is hard for someone who is used to this.” She turned to him. “What do you think?”

“I think you should follow your heart. I think you’ll know when the time is right where you should move to. I think the kids, and Henry, will understand whatever you choose.”

==

“Sonny is gentle, Blake, you’ll be fine.” Elizabeth was holding the horse still by its, his, halter. “Left foot in the stirrup and then up and over.”

He shot her another doubtful look and then glanced to where her detail were leaned against the SUV, giant grins on their face. “I don’t know.” They’d talked and hung out the evening before, but she swore the next morning she was getting him on a horse.

“I promise. We won’t go too far, you’ll be fine.”

Blake exhaled at stared at the saddle a second more before grabbing hold and doing what she said, hoisting himself up and over. The horse moved a bit, redistributing the weight, and then he was seated. “Oh.”

“It takes a bit of getting used to, but he’ll take good care of you.” She adjusted the reins and put them in his hand at just the right point. “Relax.”

“That won’t be happening.” He watched her walk away, leaving him on his own on Sonny for just long enough he considered starting to panic, but then she appeared again leading another horse, turning loose and letting it walk free for a few strides before she caught the saddle and mounted as it moved. The sight of Elizabeth sitting on her horse made him forget about his own distress over being in the same position.

A slight nudge of her heel and she was off, Sonny willingly following in line. “He won’t do anything crazy on you, he’s a bit old now.” She spoke as they passed through a gate and up a small path. “Give him a nudge with your heel and steer him up here.”

“Umm.”

“I swear it’s like driving a car.” She laughed. “Want a little more speed, use a little more foot.”

Drawing from the three minutes of riding instruction she’d given him before bringing Sonny out, Blake pressed his heels into Sonny’s belly, his breath stopped as the beast picked up the plod to walk beside Elizabeth’s horse. For a while, he simply took in the view as the horses walked, they clearly knew the path as they needed little from the people they were carrying. When he wondered if they would be turning back soon, Elizabeth turned her horse toward a gate and dismounted, opening the gate and clicking to get Sonny to walk through before leading her own in and latching the gate again.

“This is the back pasture of our property. I like to come back here to exercise them because it’s a decent size. If you don’t want Sonny to run, just pull back when I go, he won’t argue much. You can either walk that way along the fence and I’ll catch up to you in a bit or you can wait here. At the end is the gate into the front pasture.” She mounted again and clicked, pushing her horse to speed up.

Blake found she’d been right, Sonny didn’t need too terribly much convincing to stay put as he watched Elizabeth push her own horse into a run along the long side of the pasture, slowing to make the corner and then off again. He found himself mesmerized by the sight and didn’t move to head toward the gate until she was walking her horse toward him a half hour later. “Wow, that was…” He trailed off.

“I used to take them out all the time. I miss riding so often.” Her smile was more brilliant than he’d seen in a long while. “Henry used to ride, but he only learned after we got married.”

“When did you learn?” He heard himself asking.

“I grew up with horses, so… young.” She turned her horse and led the way back.

After they returned and got the horses cleaned up and settled, Blake showered before returning downstairs to find Elizabeth, already changed, waiting in the living room with two mugs of tea on the table.

“I appreciate coming out here, but I know you didn’t want to come to just give me a break from everything. So, talk, what’s been on your mind?”


	20. Chapter 20

Alison coming downstairs to model her dress cut off their conversation about the budget. Blake had to admit, he was impressed with her skills. “It looks great.”

“Thanks!” She twirled. “I’m going full Edie Sedgwick for the Spring Fling. Do you think it’s too short?”

Blake sent Elizabeth a look, begging her to jump in.

“It’s a bit short, Noodle. Did you get asked then?”

“No, I asked someone actually. Thad Newton.” She grinned at her mom, excited.

“Thad Newton?” Blake recognized the name. “Isn’t he Senator Newton’s son on the Foreign Relations Committee?”

“Oh, god, do you think his mom made him say yes?” Ali groaned.

“No!” Elizabeth answered quickly as Jason jumped in to start teasing his sister. Once they both vanished upstairs, she sat at the table, turning to Blake. “You didn’t have any siblings to fight with, did you?”

“No.” He dropped the towel he’d been using and sat as well. “Alison is exceptionally talented in design, but that dress… I’m really glad you were home for that question.”

“Why’s that?”

“It feels weird telling her it’s too short. I don’t know…” He laughed a bit. “I guess there are still some things where I’m not quite sure where the line is between me being an outsider and me being part of the family I guess.”

She thought about that a minute. “You’re part of the family, Blake.”

“We’re coming up on a year.” He pointed out. “I think you should take some time, just you and the kids. I’ll…crash with someone.”

“I think taking a few days sounds like a good idea, but you don’t have to go away. This is your home to now.”

“But you don’t need me here for that.”

“Maybe not, but I want you here.”

“Okay.” He relented. “So, with everything going on, are you going to be able to be home for this dance? I’m assuming Thad is picking her up.”

==

Blake was working on paperwork as his desk when Jason and Alison came down dressed for the dance. Curious, he watched them come in.

“Blake, please tell Jason that wearing sneakers to a formal event isn’t as cool as he thinks it is!”

“It’s fine!” Jason argued.

“Do you not see how Blake dresses every day?” Ali shot back, turning to her brother. “Like something out of a magazine and you’re acting like it’s cool to wear gym clothes with a suit. How can you not grasp what sophisticated formalwear looks like?” She followed him as he started to walk away. “You see it every single day, can’t you learn something?”

“At least my clothes cover my body!” Jason finally turned back to her. “What is up with that dress?”

“What’s wrong with my dress?” She turned back to the office and Blake. “What’s wrong with this?”

Blake froze, trying to process the entire argument the pair had just had, and the question Ali just asked. “Uhh… It’s a bit…Are you sure it’s going to be warm enough?”

“It’ll be fine.” She responded as Jason answered the phone that was certainly security calling in.

“Thad’s here.” He shared. “Now we can all go.” He headed for the door.

“Um. You can go, Jason.” Blake stood, buttoning his jacket. This, he told himself, he could do. A teenage boy wasn’t some despot with a god complex. Ali let Thad in.

“Thad, this is Blake. He’s, uh, a friend of my mom’s. Blake, this is Thad Newton.” She grinned.

“Good to meet you, Thad. How did you get here tonight?”

“Uh, I drove, it’s my Range Rover out front.”

“Mind if I see your driver’s license?”

“Uh, sure.” Thad pulled it out.

“Blake!” Alison hissed as he took a picture of it.

“Thanks.” He handed it back. “I’ll remind you all, no drinking and the agreed-on curfew, not a minute later.” They all groaned their understanding as they left.

Just before the door shut, Blake heard Thad ask. “Who is he, exactly?”

Once he was alone, Blake dialed his phone and waited for it to connect. “Hey.”

“Blake.” Elizabeth sounded relieved to hear from him. “Kids leave?”

“Yeah, just now. Thad’s as tall as I am, seemed nice.”

“That’s good.”

“As a guy, he gave off a vibe I don’t trust.”

She laughed. “Blake! They’re kids.”

“I used to be one of those.”

“No, I’m pretty sure you were born like you are now.” She laughed a bit more.

“How are things your end?” He changed the subject. “I can be helpful now that my job’s to sit here and wait for curfew.”

“It’s falling apart around me, Blake. I’m not sure how much you can help with, but maybe Jay has something. I’ll let everyone know you’re free to remotely help if they need it. The way things are going, I’m sure you’ll be bombarded.”

“Bring it on. Did you eat dinner?”

“It’s been busy.”

“So, no. I am texting Nadine to tell her to make sure you eat.”

“Really?”

“I know what you’re like, don’t argue with me.”

“Okay.” She sighed. “Blake? You’re really okay being there doing the teenager thing tonight?”

“I am. And I think Alison might have paid me a compliment earlier while yelling at Jason. I’ll tell you about it when you get home and you can decide.”

“Sounds like a plan. And, Blake? Don’t sneak Cupcake Wars, you must wait for me to get there. I hate when you watch ahead of me.”

“Yes, Ma’am.” He laughed.

==

Hours later, Blake answered his phone to find Nadine on the other end. “Blake, I’ve put the Secretary in the motorcade and sent her home. The truck had the girls in it.” He’d been looped in in stages as the investigation progressed. “They all suffocated. All of them are dead… Including Lara Cramer.” He heard her draw a breath. “It’s… I don’t even know how to put it into words.”

“Okay.” His heart sank, they’d all been invested in this rescue. “I’ll handle it. Thanks for the heads up.” He ended the call and closed what he was working on, killing some time clearing the downstairs of debris of the day and then heading up to change into sweats. From his room, he heard Elizabeth come in and drop her things before dragging up the stairs and heading straight for her room. Grabbing his phone and flipping the switch, he quietly made his way down the hall, she was just standing and staring. “I heard.” He whispered, approaching from behind. “Nadine called after she sent you home.”

“We couldn’t save them.”

“I know.”

“We were so close.”

“Come on.” He nudged her to get her moving again. “Don’t worry about anything right now.” She shed her shoes and earrings. “Get changed and then come to bed.” He knew the kids would be back soon and he thought he should make sure the dance went okay, even if Elizabeth wasn’t it the frame of mind to deal with them. While she vanished into the bathroom, he tossed the extra pillows onto a chair and pulled the covers back, rearranging what was left before getting settled. He was surprised when she didn’t go all the way around, but instead sat on the edge beside him, falling against him. Unsure what else he could do, he held her close.

==

Blake heard the kids come home and checked that Elizabeth was still asleep before easing out of bed and heading down to check on them. He got to the top of the stairs just as he heard them arguing about Alison ditching her date. He didn’t know what else to do except listen as Ali admitted Thad had tried to do something to her and then Jason’s angry demand to know details. The argument blew up and he worried they’d wake Elizabeth, but almost as soon as it started, Ali was finishing it, possibly in the worst way as it hit everyone’s nerves.

“Dad was wrong, Jason!” She shouted. “He’s not a girl! You should’ve said something! Guys like Thad get away with it because guys like you don’t say anything!” She started to storm away until she saw Blake on the stairs. “Damn.”

He let the language go. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, nothing happened. He tried to get me into a room with him, but I ditched him.”

“Tried how hard?”

“I’m okay, Blake. I promise. I didn’t even let him kiss me. It just sucks that I can’t ask a guy out and wear a dress I like without it apparently being an invitation to do things to me. It’s not fair.”

“I know it’s not.” He looked over at Jason. “Could you head up? I’m going to talk to Alison a minute.”

“Yeah, sure. Mom home?”

“She’d already asleep, please keep the noise down?”

“Sure.”

Blake waited until Jason was up the stairs before sighing and facing Ali. “What happened?” He listened carefully as she recounted the entire evening. “I am sorry this happened to you, Ali.” He offered her a hug.

“Why can’t more guys be good guys like you?” She asked into his arm. “Why do guys like Thad do it?’

“I don’t know. Head up to bed, your mom had a long, hard day, so she might not be up for much rehashing of your night tomorrow morning. Cut her some slack if she’s a little off, okay?”

“Yeah, okay.” He waited for her to go up before he headed back to where Elizabeth was sleeping.


	21. Chapter 21

“It’s in my office.” Nadine softly shared as she caught Blake in the hall. “Whenever you want to, come have a look and make sure it’s in order.”

“Uh, give me a few minutes? I’m about to send her to meet with Russell and then I’ll be in.”

“Sounds good.” She headed back to her desk. The box was tucked on the couch, so when Blake made his way back to her fifteen minutes later, she watched as he carefully opened it. “You’ve been working hard on this.” She observed.

“I called everyone I could think of- his family, friends, POTUS even. I found as much as I could. Do you think it’s too much?” He worried.

“No. I think it’s a beautiful gift.”

The professionally bound book was filled with photos he’d procured from anyone he could think of, he wanted pictures that perhaps hadn’t been seem before. The anniversary of Henry’s passing was approaching quickly, and Blake had thought collecting photos that marked the history of their twenty-five years of marriage would be something she would like.

“She’ll cry but it’s wonderful. When are you giving it to her?”

“Tonight, or tomorrow morning. She said I didn’t have to leave, but I want to give them time to be a family, so I’m crashing with Matt a couple nights. I’ll probably regret that choice, but he was the first person I thought to ask, and he said yes.”

“And you’ll be in as usual?”

“Yes. Elizabeth will be off three days planned, but I will be in as usual to do whatever needs done.” He put the book back in the box. “Life is moving on. Alison hears from colleges next week, Stevie too, then Ali graduates. Stevie is still postponing a wedding, but it’s all… moving forward.”

“And how is Blake’s life going?” When she got a confused look back, she laughed. “For all intents and purposes, you’re in a relationship, no matter how unconventional. That’s a big life change for anyone.”

“Yeah.” He agreed. “Eighteen months ago, if you’d said I’d essentially have three kids, a niece who acts like I hung the moon, and a partner of undefined connection, I would have thought you’d lost your mind. And now I’ve made meals, bought groceries, sat up for curfews and had talks I never imagined having while breaking up fights and… I don’t know… doing laundry? I have found myself anticipating Alison’s college acceptance, giving piano lessons, and rooting for Stevie at Harvard, though that could be a bit more self-motivated.”

“And?”

“And now I worry that everyone is healing and moving on, which is good, but I gave up a year… Not that I regret a minute of it, but the thought of it being time to walk away terrifies me.” He sighed and sank back against the couch. “Does it make me crazy?”

“No. What makes you think you’ll have to walk away? Has someone said something?”

“Well, no. But the whole deal originally was… I don’t even remember anymore. There was never a giant discussion about how long it would last or when it would end.”

“Maybe there needs to be.” She smiled at him gentle, she could see how distraught the topic was making him. “And perhaps sooner rather than later.”

“But…”

“I’m telling you, Blake. Trust me. You can’t live in limbo like this, decide what you do or don’t want and then have a discussion.”


	22. Chapter 22

He was just finishing up with a call to Andrews Base when Blake saw Daisy cautiously heading toward his desk. “Something wrong?”

“Uh, is the Secretary still here?” It was late, she was honestly surprised Blake was still there.

“She’s up on the roof.”

“What?”

He laughed lightly. “It’s one of her secret hideaways. Matt and the other agents hate it. She could be a while, is there something I can help with?”

“I, uh, not right now? I kind of need to talk to her before someone else does. But if you’re going to be around, I’ll come back?”

“I’m here till she leaves tonight.” He looked her over. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Fine.” He watched her nervously head for the stairwell that accessed the roof. When she came back down half an hour later, he all but rushed to her at the sight of dried tears in her eyes.

“What’s going on?” He insisted.

“I-” Daisy looked around. “In here.” She pulled him into the conference room and pushed the door shut. “I think you’re the last to know, on the team anyway… I’m pregnant.”

His face lit up and then realized she didn’t look happy. “You’re not happy about this?”

“The father was Joseph Garcia.”

“Oh, Daisy.” He didn’t hesitate to hug her. “I’m so sorry. You’re not alone though, you still have all of us.”

Daisy let out a laugh. “The Secretary just said almost that exact same thing.”

“Well, see then, we’re all thinking it.” He pulled away. “Do you want to talk about anything tonight?”

“Um, I was going to meet up with Nadine. But I’ll let you know, okay?”

“Okay.” He agreed, watching her leave. Grabbing his coat, he headed for the stairs, quietly stepping out with a nod to Matt. Elizabeth was at the wall, staring out over the city like she did, the cold breeze hit him as he stepped away from the building. “Elizabeth.”

He could see her grin as he stepped beside her. “After a day of ‘Ma’am’s and ‘Madam Secretary’s, isn’t it weird to switch to my first name?”

“No.” When she eyed him, he amended. “Not anymore. It helps with compartmentalizing. Daisy told me.”

“Yeah. It’s exciting and… I can remember each time I found out I was pregnant. Even happily married I was still so scared at first, scared to tell Henry, for whatever reason. The early months, before it was obvious to other people that I was pregnant, they were brutal. With Ali and Jason, I was so sick, and I was still working.” She sighed. “Daisy’s strong. She’ll handle it, I have no doubt. I was just reminiscing I guess about what mine were like. It’s weird, I’m sure at the time I was so miserable, but all I can remember now? The joy and love.” She turned to face Blake. “Do you think that’s all in your plans one day, Blake?”

“I don’t know. Kids are great but… I just don’t know. Maybe I end up in a relationship where kids aren’t in the cards. Who knows?” He knew she was studying him now. “Nadine had been pushing me to talk, but I doubt she meant on the roof in the cold.”

“Okay, so give me the highlights.”

“I… It’s been a few weeks. But I may have mentioned in a larger conversation that I didn’t know what the plan was with us. This us. It’s still so fresh in my mind, Nadine rushing me off to the White House, Russell telling me that Henry had died and what they needed from me and then…the world falling apart.”

“They told you first?”

“Yeah. They made me pick, commit or not, to staying by your side until you healed from losing him.” He gave his head a slight shake. “I didn’t even hesitate. And I didn’t hesitate to offer to move back in once I realized you weren’t there yet. Nadine’s talked to me a lot, made me talk to her…”

“About?’ She finally asked.

“Me, mostly. She’ll ask me about me and not let me bury myself in answering about you or the kids.” He smiled. “I can’t remember if it was her though, someone said that you would need someone who understood you still love Henry and how much you both loved this work. When I… When I started putting that book together, I’d gone to Nadine to see if I could have it shipped to her place so you wouldn’t accidentally discover it and… She…” He huffed, turning back to look out over the city. “It sounds crazy. Do you want me to keep living with you? I guess I need a plan or a…discussion at least, on what you expect out of all this.” He nervously waited for her to answer and was momentarily terrified as she turned and walked away, only to realize she was asking her detail for some privacy.

When she returned, she faced out over the city as well. “I’ve talked about you with my therapist. After Henry, I think you’re my closest friend, Blake.” She took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. “I am so far from ready to try and date anyone, it still feels like I’m cheating on him. But our friendship? Maybe it’s easier because you were friends with Henry too, he knew you. And maybe whoever said it was right, you aren’t, I don’t know, bothered, by Henry’s ghost still being around.”

They both went quite for a while. “Okay.” She turned to face him eventually, a decision clearly made. “I want you to stay. I want you to be a part of our family, my…friend, companion, whatever name we agree to call it. I trust you. But I know that wanting that means you have to give up on things you might not want to give up on like a real physical relationship, marriage, kids, a life like other people your age.”

Her admission stunned him. He’d expected the conversation to be awkward and perhaps end in her being angry or upset, but never this. “Oh. Well… I do have a life kind of like guys my age, maybe not out every night, but I wasn’t going out all the time before anyway. If anything, the last year has improved things. As for those other things, I guess I won’t know until someone comes along that makes me want them?” He didn’t know if it was the feeling of being so alone up on the roof, the night air, the long day, or something else, but he heard himself continuing. “I am thrilled to be part of you family, to be your friend or whatever else you want it to be, for as long as we’re happy with it.”


	23. Chapter 23

“Hey, Nadine?” Elizabeth stopped her in the hall, they were in Rome at the G20 conference. “You talk to Blake a lot. Has he said anything to you about this trip?”

“Ma’am?”

She huffed. “Before we left, he was anxious, but I was busy with the Middle East situation and… he’s not been forthcoming on his own, so I was really hoping he’s at least talked to you? I, you don’t have to tell me if he said something, I just wanted to be sure he’s not trapped himself in his own head.”

Nadine considered a moment. “He did come to me before we left.”

“Anything I need to worry about?”

“I think he mostly needed to talk it out and, as you said, get out of his head.” She chuckled, remembering the state of him in her office and the way he’d left. “I don’t think there is anything to worry about. He did introduce Matt and I to an old colleague when we arrived, it was very formal and official but… perhaps you could ask him about that later?”

Elizabeth seemed confused a minute. “Yeah, I can do that. Thanks Nadine.” She started to walk away.

“Oh, Ma’am?”

“Yes?”

“I sent him to fetch some things for Daisy. Given the state they both have been in, I felt it was a good momentary use of Blake’s time.”

“Got it.”

==

“Blake!” Elizabeth called through from the bedroom of the suite. “Are you really sure this dress is fine?”

Tucking his phone away, he crossed the main room to lean against the doorframe. “The dress is wonderful. You aren’t still bothered by the drone attack, are you?”

“No.” She mumbled, twisting to try and pull up the zipper.

He watched her struggle a minute before rolling his eyes. “How hard it is to say please help me with this?”

“Blake, please help me into this thing so I can go have dinner with boring world leaders that I generally don’t get along with while you get to relax and have fun.” She grumbled. When the zipper was done, she turned to face him. “How has your end been going this week?”

“Well, Daisy has spent most of the week holed up in her room sick and Matt’s been doing double duty, so the press releases aren’t affected. Also, I learned that many of the aides and assistants to other world leaders know Nadine and some quite literally tremble when they see her coming.”

That made her laugh. “Well, she’s been in Washington a long time and we all know she’s a force when she’s focused. So, big plans tonight?”

“Just sitting in the bar waiting for someone to need me.”

“Meeting up with any old coworkers?” She asked casually.

“Uh, no. How did you know…”

“I saw B&W on the schedule, you worked there. I know you avoid talking about it ever.”

“There are a few people I knew who are here, but… I don’t think I’ll be meeting up with them, it was a long time ago and our lives are so different now.”

“Okay. We’ll talk after this dinner.” She leaned in to stage whisper before leaving the room. “Find some juicy gossip for when I get back.”

“Will do.”

==

Blake’s stomach sank when Trevor turned up at the bar beside him. When he sat down, Blake held back a sigh.

“So, any word on the next drone strike?”

“I think you’re safe for now.” He flagged down the bartender and ordered Trevor’s drink.

“See, you can be nice.”

“I figured you haven’t changed, why would your drink?”

“You haven’t changed either. Still in the closet I see.”

“Wow.” All the reasons they’d split were rushing back to him now. “No how ya been, how’s the family?”

“Fine. How’s the family? Talking to them again? And why so reluctant to introduce me to your coworkers?”

“No, not in a long time.”

“You’re not doing that ‘Blake is an island’ thing again are you? Because, I gotta tell ya man, it’s not healthy.”

“I’m…not. It’s complicated.” He sipped his drink. “And my reluctance has less to do with our relationship and more to do with you, honestly.”

“Ouch. So, this complicated thing? Do they know about Blake’s special friends?”

“Do you tell every potential lay your entire history?” He shot back before walking back his irritation. “Sorry. And it’s not… Like I said, it’s complicated. And it’s private.”

“Hide it from your coworkers, private?”

Actually…technically no. They’re pretty aware.”

“Not a man then, so still closeted.”

“I like to keep my personal life out of my work life, as much as I can anyway. And I’m not closeted, I’m bi.”

“You’re still on that thing?”

“It’s not a thing, it’s who I am.” He finished his drink. “And I don’t discuss it because it leads to the same stupid conversations about what the right thing to call it is and I hate it.”

“Okay.” Trevor reached across and put his hand over Blake’s. “I guess, I just want you to be happy. And you can’t really be happy without being truly honest with another person.”

Blake stared at the hand on his until Trevor pulled back. “Yeah.”

“It was good to see you, man. Really.”

“You too.” He didn’t move as Trevor walked away, too caught up in his words about being truly honest with other people. He didn’t notice time slipping by until security was clearing the building because of a bomb. The agents that rushed him out of the bar he didn’t recognize and none of them were speaking English into their radios. “American, Secretary McCord.” He hoped one of them would understand. One seemed to because he was being grabbed by his arm and pulled sideways across the mass of bodies until he realized he was being thrust toward a face he knew. “Nadine! Where is everyone?”

“Matt was with Daisy; Jay was on his way to the Secretary. All we can do is pray they all get out.” They were jostled in the crowd and she was shoved against him with an ‘oof’. She grabbed hold of Blake around his waist, keeping grip on his jacket as he put an arm around her, no need to get separated in the evacuation.

Blake didn’t even realize that the agents rushing them out had switched until someone called them by name. “Mister Moran, Miss Tolliver, this way to the motorcade.” They were taken directly to the first vehicle.

“Any word on the others?” Blake asked as he climbed in behind Nadine.

“Matt has the Secretary, Tim and Carl have Mister Mahoney and Miss Grant.” He started to slam the door shut.

“Wait! What about Jay?”

“He was with the Secretary but stayed behind.” The door closed.

Blake turned back to Nadine. “And here I thought my biggest worry tonight was going to be having run into Trevor in the bar.”

“Did he say something?” She watched out the window. “There’s Matt and Daisy.” She pointed as they were taken to another vehicle.

“We need to go.” The driver announced. “We can’t afford to have all of you at risk of the bomb goes off.” Despite their protests, the two vehicles pulled away. Two miles down the road, he spoke again. “Secretary and Mister Whitman are clear.”

“Oh good.” They both sagged back in their seats.

“Sorry for hanging onto you back there, panicking masses like that sometimes freak me out a little bit.” She admitted to him. “Not all of us have the benefit of being big enough to be seen.” She attempted to make light of the situation.

“Believe me, I did not mind.” He admitted.

“So, Trevor turned up during your downtime?” She shifted the conversation.

“Yeah.”

“There was a lot you weren’t saying when we ran into him the other day. I doubt Matt caught it, but… Maybe I just know you differently.”

He chewed his lip. “Maybe we can talk about it when we didn’t all just almost get killed by a contagious bomb?”

“Sure.”

By the time they got to the meeting spot, the other two SUVs were joining them. They all piled out, rushing to regroup and be sure everyone was okay. On the plane later, Nadine waited until the others were all asleep before taking the empty seat next to Elizabeth. “About what we discussed earlier today…” She waited to be sure Elizabeth knew what she was referring to. “I believe something happened since then. He’s been anxious and cagey, and on him that’s never a good combination.”

“No, it’s not.” She twisted so she could see where Blake was sound asleep in his own seat. “Pushing won’t get me anywhere either.”

“No.” She agreed. “But scotch and a piano might.”

==

The ride home from the base was quiet. Elizabeth couldn’t remember the last time she saw Blake looking so distracted, but instead of pushing, she simply sat quietly, stepping in when they pulled up in front of the house and he kept fumbling with the handle of his bags, a far cry from his usually capable self. “Blake.” She softly caught his attention. “I’ve got it. Go.”

He didn’t meet her eyes as he nodded and went in, shedding his coat and things as he made his way through.

Remembering Nadine’s comment, Elizabeth called out to him. “How about a drink? It was a crazy week and I think we’ve both earned it. Not wine though.” A few minutes later he appeared with two glasses, surprised when she was by the piano. “Sit, Blake.”

He complied, getting the feeling she knew there was something he needed to get of his chest and that she was giving him the chance to gather himself first. Delaying as he debated how to start, he randomly began to play along the keys, not any tune in particular. Eventually, he spoke, not looking up at her. “I’m bisexual… I know, you’re probably wondering why I’m telling you this now. I ran into an old boyfriend, he’s kind of a pain in the ass, but he sometimes makes good points. One of those points was about what I consider my right to privacy, which I believe in, but I realize now that my right to privacy is different than being private.” He glanced up at her. “It has more to do with me trusting people with my private business, which has always been hard because people have questions or opinions and I’ve experienced a lot of phobia issues from all sorts of people. Not that I think you are, I just… I’ve just gotten used to sharing nothing and I realize now that keeping my life private like that meant I never shared _me_ with anyone and if I never share me with anyone, how can I ever have an honest experience with anyone? I’m sorry, I just… I really like you and I respect you and we’re really close and I think that means you like me too.” He sighed. “And if I can’t be honest about this, then how is any of that even real?” He chanced another look up at her before ducking his head. “That’s all.” A blush at saying so much was creeping up his neck.

“Blake.” She whispered. When he looked her way again, she wrapped him in a hug, tousling his hair when she was done. “I do like you. And respect the hell out of you. And I’m glad we are so close, because then I can say this to you without it being weird.” She sat beside him. “You are important to me. I am frequently thankful that you like me enough to be here like this. I trust you… With my secrets, with my thoughts, with my life. And it’s an honor that you are willing to trust me back.” They sat in silence again, both waiting on the other to say or do something.

Eventually, Blake turned and wrapped her in another hug. When he finally pulled back, he risked meeting her gaze, finding nothing but acceptance there. “Thank you.”


	24. Chapter 24

“We are going to be late!” Blake rushed through the kitchen. “It’s four hours to the hotel and if we don’t leave Foggy Bottom on time, we won’t have time to get our bearings before we have to head to the welcome thing.”

Elizabeth turned, watching him collect their things and move them to the door. “I don’t think a few minutes is going to hurt anything.”

He gave an exasperated look.

“Fine! I’m coming! But your going to have to feed me somewhere.” She grinned.

“I swear, isn’t it enough I ended up packing your case because you were working all night dealing with China? Now I have to feed you too?”

She patted him and she walked past for the front door. “You love me, Blake.” She laughed. “And see, I am walking out the door by the time you wanted.”

“I already hate this trip.”

==

After meeting up with everyone else and loading up, they rode to New York. Blake found himself wedged in the back seat between Jay and Matt as they ran a mobile morning meeting. “I’ve made sure to block out your time to take Alison to college. She is meeting us with her things and then hopefully we get the afternoon to do all the normal drop-off activities. Also, a reminder you are having lunch with you brother at the Four Seasons.” He worked on paperwork in his lap as he spoke.

“Yeah. Totally remembered that one.”

“Of course you did.” He tried to hide a grin.

“And Ali was really fine with us not driving her? I mean, it was horrible having to take myself to college, I never wanted my kids to go through that.”

“I’m fairly sure meeting you there is nowhere near the same thing, but yes, she is fine. I talked to her yesterday and she pointed out that she’d need her car anyway, so she would be driving even if we took her. She’s disturbingly rational sometimes.”

“Yeah, no idea where she gets that one.”

“I’m thinking it’s a McCord trait.” He bantered back, earning a faux glare from Elizabeth. “In any case, she’s only going an hour away, so you’ll have plenty of opportunities to go visit… And perhaps their student body won’t protest your presence.”

“Are we stopping to eat?”

“Food will be in the suite when we get there, so if you don’t get distracted on the way up, you will have time to grab something before we turn around and head to the UN.”

“That was a bit pointed.”

“Well, I did nearly leave without you this morning.” He looked up from the paperwork he’d been sorting to suddenly realize both Jay and Matt were staring at him. “What?”

“Nothing.” Matt shook his head. “It’s just… you two are never so obvious about your friendship.”

Nadine chuckled. “You both are in rare form today. Is this indicative of how this trip will go?”

“I guess that depends on if he feeds me or not.” Elizabeth decided to not fight the light mood.

“I managed to feed Ali and Jase omelets this morning, so me not cooking was not the issue.” He couldn’t help the lopsided smirk.

==

Will stood beside the entrance to the park and watched as his sister climbed out of one of her SUVs, followed by her security agents. “Hey, Sis.”

“Hi.” She smiled.

“I know the Four Seasons was a reach, but couldn’t you have picked something other than a food cart?”

“I’ve been busy.”

“I know.” He looked around. “No Blake?”

“What?”

“Blake. He didn’t come? He’s usually your shadow, never more than a few feet away.”

“In work settings, but this is lunch with you, not work.”

He laughed. “You still have to feed him!”

“He’s working. After the minister from Timor Leste died, it’s been a little crazy.”

“I heard about that. How are you doing?”

“Okay.” She ordered their food and waited until they were away from the crowd to say anything else. “Honestly, it was getting a bit tense between Blake and I after that happened, so stopping for lunch with you was good timing.”

“Wow, tensions between the two of you…”

“What?”

“I’ve seen _you_ fight; you fight dirty. And I’ve seen him a time or two when he had to take a call while we were visiting and he shut himself in the other room, he’d get that look in his eye.”

“It wouldn’t be that bad.” She brushed off.

“I’m not saying you both wouldn’t get over it, but I bet you have more ammo on each other to land some seriously hurtful comments than you and I do.” He sat on a bench and waited for her to join him. “Anyway. After our sad little meal, what are your plans?”

“China has left me with a lot of free time, but we’re driving over to see Ali off to school.”

“We?”

“Blake and I. The rest of my staff are staying in New York to manage anything that comes up. Some of them have meetings of their own they’ll attend. Our UNGA trips tend to pull us in all directions.”

==

The UNGA trip was shaping up to be a disaster, Blake was glad that there had already been things like lunch with Will and time away to see Ali to balance out the time spend putting out the fires of international relations. He kept reminding himself it was only a few more days, but there was one more hurdle to clear, the news circuit and Marty the Interrupter.

As Elizabeth headed out of the dressing room for the Marty interview, Nadine stopped Blake. “I was really hoping she would take the suggestion to bow out.”

“Yeah, me too.”

“How is Alison?”

“Delighted to be at college. I pulled the plug early after Daisy’s text messages because it was getting weird with the staring and the last thing we need is all those rumors and then for her to unravel over something as simple as her daughter going off to school and the media making it a thing.”

“True.” She waved toward the viewing area. “Shall we go watch and see if this turns into one?”

“Let’s go.” As they watched the interview, Blake cringed every time Marty interrupted Elizabeth. He’d not been joking when he’d called the man the highest rated interrupter on cable, the habit was grating. He was only horrified for a moment when Marty brought up the murder accusation, but the horror quickly vanished as she out-Marty’d Marty as she launched into her response.

“Well, that happened.” Nadine stated when it was all said and done, something they all found themselves saying any time Elizabeth went off script anywhere that wasn’t in private.

He grinned. “It most certainly did.”

==

“Blake, this is crazy.” Will turned to face him once his sister vanished from the room. “What’s going to be done to keep her safe?”

“Um. I’m not sure?” Blake glanced at the others. “That this is a drug cartel doing this, changes things.”

“Yeah.” Jay agreed. “It’d almost be better if it were the Russians, at least they’re not so stupid as to off the Secretary of State, not one as well liked as her.”

“And now she’s in their sights.” Will repeated what Jay’d says before. “So how is she protected? Guys, this is my sister we’re talking about!” He stood. “She seemed to think her detail can’t protect her from this.” He watched them all exchange looks. “Blake…”

“I’m sorry.” He shook his head. “I don’t have an answer right now. I…”

“Could you find one before it’s my sister’s test results I’m holding in my hand?” He started to storm out.

Blake chased after him, catching him at the door. “Now that I know it’s a threat, I will do everything in my power to stop anything from happening.”

“Those kids can’t lose their mother too.”

“I know. Believe me, Will, I know. I promise you… I’ve told her before; she can trust me with her life, and I mean that.”

“I hope so.” Will reached for the door. “Because if ever there was a moment where you had to prove how much she means to you, man, this is it.”

Blake reentered the suite once Will left to find everyone waiting on him. “He said I have to keep her alive. No pressure, right?”

==

“So.” Jay started as he joined Blake at the dining-turned-conference table in the suite. “This had been fifteen levels of crazy, so I had an idea.” He produced boxes of playing cards. “We have pretzels and other snacks and this table that fits all of us. I think we need a night in before we leave tomorrow, and we need to play. What do you say? I’m not sure any of us can handle unwinding out on the town with that threat of death that was hanging over the Secretary, and Daisy’s not usually up for being out late right now.”

“Yeah, game night sounds good actually.”

“Good.” Jay grinned. “I’ll get everything set up.”

Blake turned down the hall, finding himself at Elizabeth’s room. “How are you holding up?”

“You mean after having it spelled out that I could die the next time I ate or drank anything? I’m good. I might skip fighting with you when you want to feed me for a while though, the idea of risking getting my own food is a bit scary.”

“Well, Jay’s setting up cards and possibly snack poker in the main room. We’re going to unwind with appropriate amounts of alcohol, snacks, and some fun that will likely involve lots of cheating on all sides. Your presence is required.”

She laughed. “It’s really sad how much cheating you all do.”

“Us?! I have you know that I’m well aware of your card counting.”

“You can’t prove it.”

He just shrugged. “Will you be out in a few minutes? Daisy will be off to bed early and we want her to get to play a few rounds first.”

“Sure. Just give me a minute to check in with the kids.”

“Of course.”


	25. Chapter 25

The front door opened and closed, he heard the sound of bags being placed on the ground and shoes softly thumping across the floors. Blake was working at the kitchen table, his laptop and files spread out.

“Oh. I thought you’d be at work.” Stevie was surprised to see him home in the middle of the morning. “I- I didn’t expect anyone to be here.”

“I’m not always needed all day at the office and after being so busy during the shutdown, I’ve been doing some remote workdays. Unless a war breaks out somewhere, sometimes I can be just as efficient from home.” He looked her over. “Shouldn’t you be at the White House?”

“Russell gave me the day.” She shrugged. Blake recognized the action; she was so like her mother sometimes.

“And what possessed him to do that?” Russell wasn’t exactly the generous sort, even to those he liked. Though Blake had to admit, the Chief of Staff did have a clear soft spot for the McCords.

Tears were in her eyes in an instant. “I spent all night and this morning packing… Jareth and I split up.” The tears broke free and slipped down. “We didn’t want the same things and I… I chose work over him.”

Blake stood and crossed the kitchen, pulling her into a hug. “I’m so sorry. Working our kind of job can be hard on people, I’ve seen a lot of relationships fall apart because of the demands. I’m just sorry you had to experience that already at your age.”

She pulled away shaking her head. “No. Russell said I didn’t have to come in, I was on the way to the airport to go to England when he called and he said he’d see me in a week, but I skipped the trip. I chose work over going to England… And it wasn’t because I had to, Russell was fine with me being gone.”

“I see. Are you okay?” He headed to the fridge to find a snack of some sort for her.

“I’m not even sure.” She huffed. “And he didn’t break it off with me… I ended it. I realized the voice in my head was saying not to go to England and I never listen to it… it seemed maybe I should.” When he handed her a bowl with yogurt and fruit in it, she thanked him. “I’m not even sure where I’m going to stay. My first thought was to just move back in here, but…I haven’t told my mom yet.”

“It’ll be almost a full house. And your mom’s going to want to be there for you, she isn’t going to mind you moving home.”

“You seem confident in that.”

He smiled to himself. “I’m the one that hears her talking about having an empty nest. I don’t know if she was like that before your dad died, but she definitely worries about it now. You three are her life.” He returned to his work. “If you need help with anything, just say the word, okay?”

“Yeah, okay. Thanks.” She stayed standing in the kitchen as she ate, once the snack was gone, she edged over to a chair and sat across from Blake. “Can I ask you something?”

“You can ask.”

“You and Mom.” The clicking of the keyboard stopped and she looked up, realizing he was warily staring at her. “Not- That’s not what I was going to ask. Relax. It’s just… Mom and Dad always talked about how they were best friends, like, before anything else. They’d say that their marriage was so solid because they were best friends first and then husband and wife second. You and Mom are close friends, but she still says he’s her best friend. We had a conversation during the shutdown, and I asked about Dad. I guess it was part of me debating the whole Jareth thing without even realizing it.”

“Anyone who can find what your parents had is incredibly lucky. It’s rare.”

“Do you think they were right? That you have to be best friends first?”

Blake sighed, considering it a minute. “In my own experience, because I can’t speak for them, any relationship hits times where the romance side wanes. A disagreement over something, being busy, simple natural attrition. And in those times, if they are your best friend, you will stick it out better, I think. But that’s just me.”

He stared at the screen a moment before closing it and resting his arms on the table. “As far as your mom and I, keep in mind I can only speak from my perspective. She still loves your Dad; I think she may do forever. And since I’m not looking for a romantic relationship with her, I don’t care. I’m not competing with him.”

“I get that. I don’t think Jareth and I were particularly good friends.” She looked around at the table. “Sorry, you’re working. I’m- I’m going to go deal with my stuff and leave you alone. What time’s my mom supposed to be home tonight?”

“Late. She has a phone meeting at eight fort-five and won’t be home till that’s over. I scheduled fifteen minutes, but given who she has to speak to, it could go later.”

“Oh. Okay.”


	26. Chapter 26

“Stop!” Elizabeth halted Blake where he was frantically torturing what looked like they once were eggs. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you the last couple days, but you have to stop.” She took him by the shoulders and turned him away from the stove. “What is eating at you? I’m not sure I can allow you to work if you’re like this… Talk to me.”

“My, uh, my parents are going to be in town? I Haven’t talked to them in…ages. They never approved of anything I do, my jobs, my relationships…”

“How can they not like your job? You are literally helping save the world! How’s that a bad thing?” She laughed.

“Well, public service doesn’t exactly pay well. They act like I shot a fire hose of cash over a cliff when I left finance. To them, it doesn’t really matter what you do, so long as you get rich doing it.” He looked back and the disaster of eggs in the pan. “These eggs look about how I feel.”

“I know.”

“And.” He carried on. “They always have opinions about my relationships, or my lack of relationships.”

“All of them? Or, say, only half?” She gave him a lopsided smile when he looked up in surprise. “When was the last time you saw them?”

“Years. I try to avoid it and this job provides surprisingly good cover.” He made sure the stove was off and poked at the eggs with the spatula. “They’re going to ask me about relationships and then when I tell them I live with my boss; they’ll jump to assuming we’re sleeping together. They’ll feel entitled to an explanation I don’t want to give about a subject I don’t really want to talk about with them.”

“Well, maybe they need to see where you work. Then they can brag to their friends about it, you should bring them in.”

“That sounds…horrifying.”

She laughed. “Then bring them over for dinner. We’ll even see if Ali has time to come home for the night. It’ll be nice.”

“Nice? Did you not hear me?”

“Hey, we scrub up reasonably well. And really, how bad can it go?”

He watched her start to walk away, thoughts turning over in his mind. “How bad? You do remember I’ve sat through regular family dinners for nearly two years.”

==

The hotel his parents were staying at was downtown. Blake rushed in, dodging the mid-day foot traffic. A concierge recognized and greeting him as he approached where his parents were waiting. “Mom, Dad, how was the flight?”

“You know, I think those first-class seats are starting to get smaller.” His dad complained. “It seems like every year, there’s a little less leg room.” He frowned at his son. “What do you think? Or does a public service salary only allow for coach?”

Blake ground his teeth to keep back the first retort that came to mind. “Actually, most of my travel is on a private plane.”

“Ah, yes, taxpayers pay for your travel.” The barb made Blake grind his teeth harder. If the were going to be like this the entire time they were in DC, he was going to need a dental visit when they left.

“I have part of the afternoon off; I was thinking I could finally show you where I work.” He led them out to the sidewalk and turned.

“Where are we going?” He mother asked.

“Walking to my office. It’s a lot faster than trying to get a cab, with traffic and such. It’s only a few minutes away.”

“Walking?” She sounded horrified by the prospect.

“Mom, this is DC, literally everyone walks everywhere. Well, except the few people who must be kept in bullet proof cases, but even then… Sometimes they do too. They just piss a lot of people off when they do.”

“Fine, we’re in DC, we’ll do it your way.” They both continued to pick at the city as they followed him.

Once they neared the building, Blake pulled out his phone. “Hold on, let me call up and say we’re here.” He stepped away to speak a moment to Elizabeth before leading them through security and up to Seven.

His parents gushed about the look of everything. The sight of a receptionist just for the seventh floor, the security, the way the rooms looked, it was always about appearance with them. He was thankful when Elizabeth emerged to rescue him from their opinions.

“Mom, Dad, this is Elizabeth. I mean, Secretary McCord.” He tried to cover the error, relaxing slightly when Elizabeth grinned at him. “These are my parents, Fred and Edie.”

“It’s so good to meet you both.” Elizabeth shook their hands, sparing a look at Blake before turning her attention fully to them, attempting to use a little of the diplomacy they bragged about in the State Department to hopefully give him a momentary break. When the couple were distracted by Matt and Kat showing up, she tugged Blake aside. “Did you invite them to dinner?”

“I will mention it. They’re trying to buy me a condo. It already feels like a trap.”

“Where?”

“Shaw.”

“Oh, wow. That’s…fancy.”

“Says the person living in a Georgetown mansion.” He smirked. “They asked me to come along to the open house. I’ll go, see it, attempt to keep the peace for one time in our lives.”

“And invite them to dinner.” She added.

“Fine.” He turned back to where his mom was now watching them. “Are you guys ready to go? Everyone is always so busy here; we really should be out of their way.” He led them out.


	27. Chapter 27

“How was the condo?” Elizabeth whispered when Blake turned up that evening with his parents in tow.

“It was a bribe to quit State.” He whispered back. “Please tell me that glass is for me.” He pointed to the one in her hand.

She chuckled but handed it over, brows raising at how fast he polished off half of it. “Well. Tonight, you have a buffer. Ali is home, so all three are joining us and, you know, if anyone can distract a conversation, it’s the three of them.”

“Yeah.” He sighed, leaning against the counter beside her and then leaning to the side so they were just against one another slightly. “I swear my afternoon is giving me hives.”

“Dinner will be about ten minutes, why don’t you head upstairs and relax a bit? They’ll be fine without you hovering for five minutes.”

“You didn’t cook, did you?”

She nudged him. “No! Stevie did. And we’re all thankful she takes after Henry.”

“Yes, we are.” He finished the wine and stood. “I’ll go check on them.”

“Blake?” She waited for him to look back. “It’s okay.”

==

The meal finished and the kids had gone upstairs, Elizabeth was cleaning up in the kitchen to give Blake some time on his own with his parents. After stressing to Jason just how important it was to Blake that the meal happen without any of the usual arguments and issues, she was floored when he didn’t start anything, and then marginally bothered that he was never willing to cool it for her guests. Any time his parents had tried to talk about something that set Blake on edge, Stevie or herself had deflected their attention onto something else, which was probably for the best as he’d been determined to keep the wine going every time they tried to push.

From the kitchen she could just hear them in the front room. “I’m guessing this is your office?” Ted asked.

“Well, it’s Elizabeth and I’s office. That one’s hers, please don’t touch that Mom, it’s confidential.” Elizabeth imagined that last comment corresponded to him moving a file.

“She into Theology?”

“No, her husband was a Theologian. He was a professor and an author.”

“Did you know him?”

“I was friends with him, yes. Will you just… Here, Mom sit and please stop touching this stuff.”

“Fine, Dear.”

“Thank you.”

“How long have you two been together?” Ted asked.

Elizabeth heard Blake sigh dramatically. “We aren’t _together_ , Dad, why do you always do this?”

“Do what? Want our son to have a good life, be happy, maybe one day have a family?”

“I am happy. I do have a good life and a good job.” Blake insisted.

“As a kept man, sure, shacking up with your boss and living in the shadow of her dead husband.” The tone was hard, Elizabeth suspected Blake was reaching the end of his tolerance.

“I’m not a ‘kept man’ as you call it, my finances are none of your business. And I’m not ‘shacking up’ with anyone or living in anyone’s shadow. All you care about is appearances! God… what would it really take for you to approve of anything about me? Huh? Actually _be_ the President of the United States? Or would that still be a problem because that’s public service? I told you before, I am literally the right hand of one of the busiest and most powerful women in the world, which is way better than anything I would be doing in the private sector! I literally live in a house surrounded by security! Even when we’re on the farm, there’s security! Even POTUS thinks I’m important enough to be somebody!”

“Farm?” Edie asked at the same time her husband asked, ‘POTUS?’

When Blake started again, his voice was a normal tone. “In Virginia, there are horses. And yes, POTUS.”

“You talk to the President?” Ted sounded surprised.

“Did you miss the part about being the Secretary of State’s right hand? Yes, I talk to the President. I also talk to all sorts of other world leaders.”

“You mean, their assistants and staff.” Edie guessed.

“Not always.” He made a frustrated noise. “Just ask.”

Elizabeth wasn’t sure what he was asking, or to which parent, until she heard his mom speak. “Is this the kind of life you want for yourself?”

“Before everything changed, I probably would have said no. But then Henry died, and Elizabeth needed me, and I didn’t even have to consider it. I can’t imagine walking away from all this, and not because of the fancy house or whatever else you think. I knew her before all of that anyway. She’s my best friend and that’s more important than anything else.” He sighed. “Maybe one day I’ll find someone and settle down and do the picket fence and two point five kids, but for right now? This is where I want to be. And no amount of judgement or comments from you will change my mind on that.”

“But-” Ted started.

“Not even a condo, Dad. Why would I move into there and rattle around alone when I could have this? This house is so alive, it’s not always pretty, but it’s also not a museum.”

“Fine.” Ted said. “We get it. You’re happy.”

“Thank you. Now, I do have to be up early tomorrow because I do have to work a job that I love, and I would love to keep it.”

“Okay, we’ll go.” Elizabeth listened to the sounds of them gathering their things and heading for the door. She heard the door open before Edie spoke one last time. “You’re really not sleeping with your boss? I mean, she’s a lovely woman, even if she’s older. I understand some guys are into that kind of thing. A cougar or something they call it now. It’s not traditional, but-”

“Mom, leave.” Blake cut her off sharply. “Please go, you’re making my life weirder than it already is.”

Elizabeth held in a laugh as the door clicked shut, followed by a groan and a thump of something hard banging on the door. Silently, she crept through the pantry and into the living room, watching as Blake banged his head on the door.

Eventually, he turned and saw her. “Please tell me you didn’t hear any of that?” He begged.

“Which part? That they still wouldn’t be happy if you were leader of the free world? Or the part where your mom called me a cougar when she asked if you were sleeping with me?” She grinned wide. “Come on, have a nightcap or two and then I’ll call your boss and tell them you’ll be late tomorrow because you’ll be nursing a hangover.”

“Sounds good.” He shuffled toward the drinks. “Hopefully, she doesn’t mind.”

“I think she’ll get over it, you did call her the most powerful woman in the world, after all.”


	28. Chapter 28

“How many of these dinners are there?” Elizabeth groaned as they stumbled into the house. “I swear this is the third event this week!” She tried to pull her coat off, fumbling when her scarf caught around her neck. “Ow!”

Blake abandoned shedding his own coat to rescue her. “Because it was the third one this week.”

“My feet hurt; I hate shoes.” She hobbled toward the couch, grabbing his arm so she didn’t fall.

“I know. Sit.” Once she was seated, he peeled off his own things. “The Foreign Minister was determined to drink me under the table.”

“I know!” She laughed. “I could hear you laughing. I don’t know how you have fun at any of these things.”

Well, it’s easy when I’m not there in an official capacity. He was an interesting guy, knew he way around a Broadway tune.”

“You are such a nerd.” She finally got her shoes off. “Oh, that feels so much better.”

He sat at the other end of the sofa. “Give me your feet. You know, you could wear flats, or at least lower heels.”

“But then all my dresses would need altered.” His thumb pressed into the arch of her foot and she moaned. “Oh my god don’t stop.”

He chuckled. “You used to like getting dressed up.”

“That was before Conrad decided I needed to attend every event in DC. He wants me to run for president after his term.” She moaned again. “I don’t want to be president. It’s not fun.”

“Well, I can have fun anywhere if I’m in the mood for it.”

“I become president and you’ll never get to sit another one of these damned things out again.” She warned.

“Wait, why me? I’m innocent here!”

“Because it’ll be your fault for not stopping me from doing something stupid.”

“Fine.” He carried on the massage on the other foot. “I will turn up and suffer through the destruction of my liver if it means you in the position you deserve.”

“You sound like Russell.”

He dropped her foot. “And now I’m out. I can’t handle kind of negativity.” He made to stand up, stopping as she grabbed him, laughing.

“Wait! Stop. I’m sorry. Please save my feet?”

He acted put out. “Fine. Good news is next week there are only…two of these dinners.”

“Two?! Come on, Blake! Can’t you do better than that?”

He tried to school his features. “I’m sure I can find one or two more for us to attend.” He was ready with one arm up when she whacked him with a pillow.

==

“That’s it, I’m quitting and moving back to the farm!” It was a week later and, just as Blake had promised, they were getting ready for the second formal dinner of the week. Elizabeth entered his room, one hand holding her dress to her chest while the other held the skirt so she wouldn’t trip on it. “Zip me, please?”

“You are not quitting over one state dinner.” Blake was nearly ready, his bowtie was untied and hanging around his neck.

“This isn’t about one dinner; this is about like thirty dinners.”

“You’re going to be just a delight tonight, aren’t you?”

She turned to face him. “I was considering having a glass of wine before we leave, get the party started early.”

He started to argue but reconsidered. “White in case you spill.”

Elizabeth grinned as she walked out. “I’ll keep that in mind for later.”

==

“If I promise to behave, can we stop and get real food on the way home?” Elizabeth whispered behind her wine glass. “I’m over rich people food.”

“If you can smile and pretend the people around you are interesting for another hour, I will make Matt go through a drive-thru and you can have whatever greasy, carby thing you want. My treat.”

“You sure know how to treat a girl.” She giggled. “Now find me an interesting person to talk to and we have a deal.”

“I’ll do my best.” The best he ended up being able to do was a special guest couple who were involved in missionary work in Africa. When he approached them, they seemed easy going and not hung up on trapping of title, so he directed Elizabeth their way and let them monopolize much of her evening. On the way home later, he had Matt stop for food and then watched with a grin as she ate. “This is vaguely familiar to my prom experience.”

Elizabeth laughed. “Yeah? How’s that?”

“Tux, more alcohol than I should’ve had, in the back of a chauffeured car with a girl I wasn’t about to have sex with, eating fast food in our fancy clothes.” As soon as he realized all of what he’d just said, he clamped a hand over his mouth and flamed red. “I can’t believe I just said that.” She only laughed harder.

When she calmed a bit, she offered him a fry. “So, no sex on prom night?”

“I didn’t say that.” He pulled the bag closer so he could help himself to more fries. “I wasn’t about to have sex with the girl who was with me in the car… There were two couples who rented it together… The girls had early curfews.”

“Ah.”

He felt his blush darken. “Yeah. Memorable prom.”

“You could have ordered your own food, you know.” She watched him eat.

“You never finish. And anyway, while you were talking, I texted Russell’s people and said we had a scheduling conflict next week and no dinners.”

“Really?!” Her face lit up.

“Really. You’re right, we’ve been doing these like crazy. It’s too much. I’m going to end up either an alcoholic or with a heart condition.”


	29. Chapter 29

“Can you imagine how many meetings and discussions it took to get this thing made?”

Blake followed Elizabeth between the pillars of the Lincoln Memorial. “Apparently there was an argument to make this into a log cabin.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah.” He craned his neck, taking it in. After last year’s decision to leave the family to be together alone for the anniversary of Henry’s death, this year Elizabeth had insisted that he be with them. They’d decided to visit a few tourist sites that they rarely got to take time to enjoy and just have fun together.

Behind where they were trying to appreciate the magnitude of the memorial, the kids were already complaining about being there at all.

“I don’t remember ever being like that at their age.” He turned toward her.

“You probably were.” She laughed. “Or maybe not. Hey, guys, come on. We asked Blake to join us and we’re doing all the things Dad would’ve liked, so please? A little engagement in our day?”

He watched them complain. “Did you guys ever ‘do DC’ as a family?’

“No.” Jason answered quickly. “Dad always wanted to, and we went to a few museums and the Zoo here and there, but we never did all the memorials.”

“At the risk of hijacking your mom’s plans for today, what do you think we should do to celebrate your dad?”

“Eat!” Jason seemed to be the only one engaging.

“Dad would’ve just tried to teach us everything.” Alison finally added.

“Okay. Food.” He turned to Elizabeth.

“I know just the place. Food, family fun, and we can see the cherry blossoms on the way.”

“Lead on.” He glanced at the trio trailing behind. “Would it be mean to take their phones away?”

“They’ll stage an uprising.”

“Right.”

The pizza place was not the kind of place they usually patroned, but the look on Elizabeth’s face said it all, she was delighted as she made a beeline for coins to start playing games in the arcade. “Guys.” He stopped the kids. “Please just, for your mom? She wants to do this to remember your dad, to enjoy something you would’ve enjoyed together. Can you give her that?”

“Yeah, fine.” They agreed. And hour later, they were all deep in competition, trying to beat Elizabeth’s skeeball score. He wasn’t surprised she was so competitive, and they all found themselves laughing.

“Ma’am!” The security agents appeared a short time later, pulling Elizabeth aside. “We have to get you off the premises right now.”

“Wait, what?” She turned back. “Blake!” She couldn’t see the kids though.

“It’s code Night Watch, Ma’am.”

Blake made it to her side just in time to see a look of shock and mild horror cross her face. “What? What’s wrong?”

“You have to come with us, Ma’am.” The agents hauled her outside, Blake following behind.

He hovered at her side as she spoke to Russell, only hearing her side of the short conversation. When she hung up, she turned to face him. “Blake.”

“We have a helicopter waiting, Ma’am.” The agent interrupted. “We have to get going.”

“No.” She pulled away. “I’m all my kids have; I’m going to stay with them. Try Deputy Cushing.”

“Helicopter for what?”

“Go!” She waved the agents away. “I’m staying.” They finally nodded and turned away, leaving them on the sidewalk. He was shocked when she reached out and took his hand. “Have you ever heard of code Night Watch, Blake?” He could hear the tears in her voice.

“No.”

She swallowed hard, her voice dropping to a whisper. “It’s the code for nuclear war. The helicopter was to take me, only me, to Mount Weather.”

“Shouldn’t there be advisories and things?”

“It’s done.”

Unsure what to say, he pulled her into a hug.

“I couldn’t leave them, even to save myself.”

“Let’s go back in and be with them then.” He turned toward the door. When she kept a tight hold of him, he did the only thing that seemed to make sense and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. She didn’t separate when they found the kids playing air hockey and he found he didn’t mind. The idea that they could all be dying today, on the anniversary of Henry’s death, was overwhelming beyond words. He’d spent years as a guy in the know, helping in the fight to prevent global destruction, but this, this lack of control over anything, the inability to change course, was utterly terrifying.

“Blake?” She softly said his name after they’d watched the kids play several games. He glanced down, waiting for her to share whatever she was thinking. “I’m glad you’re here with me. From our first day in DC, to the end, right?” She spared a glance up at him. “You’ve become my best friend, thank you for that.”

“I’m happy to be there for you, Elizabeth. To the end, you and I.” He pulled her into a hug, giving in and pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “You’re my best friend too.”

Neither of them could find the motivation to go back to playing any of the games and instead just watched the kids as they ran from place to place around the arcade. It was as if time slowed down, waiting for the world to come to an end. ‘ _It’s done’_ in her voice kept repeating in Blake’s mind. It was so final, so life altering.

“Ma’am.” The agents appeared again; they didn’t understand why until he went on. “We’re off code Night Watch. All clear.”

Blake wasn’t even sure if he’d fully processed the words before Elizabeth nearly collapsed, gasping for air. Holding her close, he tried to talk to her, keep her calm, hearing as Stevie and then the other two shout and come running at the sight of their mom in distress. “It’s okay, it’s okay.” He wasn’t sure who he was talking to, himself, Elizabeth, or the kids. “She just forgot to eat.” He explained away, hoping they would believe it. “Jason, can you go get something? Some pizza maybe?”

“Yeah, sure.” He hurried away.

“Eat, Mom.” Stevie ordered, heading back to the game they’d been playing. “And really, Blake, you should be taking better care of her than that.”

When they kids were back to their game, she turned to him and he pulled her close, not caring how it might look this time. Their relief came out in a mix of laughter and tears as she held tight to his jacket. “I thought this was it.” She eventually whispered.

“Me too.”

“I meant it, what I said earlier today.” She ducked her face. “Over the last couple years, you’ve become my best friend, the person I can turn to. I’m sorry I didn’t voice that before the end of the world.”

“I meant it too. But now the world’s not ending today, so how about we eat, go home, and then figure out how to stop it from happening tomorrow.”

“Okay. I have to go to the White House though. Maybe you can take them home and I’ll be there as soon as I can?”

He let her pull away. “I’ll take care of it. Hey.” He stopped her. “Will you be okay?”

“Yeah. I promise, good to go.”

==

It was as if the whole world had changed but hadn’t at the same time. Dinner was on the table by the time Elizabeth got back, the kids were back to arguing and complaining about their own lives and he could see how much the noise was bothering her, but he didn’t want to press. Until they could talk, he didn’t know what new information she might’ve learned at the White House.

“I can’t normalize.” She admitted once they were on their own. “I don’t know how to get my life back. It’s all I can think about.”

“Me too.” He admitted. “I got text messages from everyone before you got home, they all went out for drinks. Rumors are running crazy about what happened today.”

“I bet.” She checked her phone when it beeped. “Conrad’s here.”

“That can’t be good.” He stayed in his seat as she went to the door.

“Evening, Bess.” Blake heard POTUS say from the entry. He finally stood and moved to the doorway. “Blake.” Conrad acknowledged him.

“He’s mostly read in.” Elizabeth stated. “He was with me today and…” She waved her hand a bit. “’Live with it’ is I all have for you today.”

“I understand.” Conrad took a seat.

==

The following evening, after Elizabeth jetted off to meet Avdonin and then her hash-out with SecDef, they whole family settled down to watch TV together, Blake was surprised when Elizabeth sat closer than she normally did, the bowl of popcorn on her lap. He was still having a hard time normalizing and suspected maybe she was as well. It was something they weren’t going to get past for a long time.

He wasn’t even sure what they were watching on TV, something about animals, the sound was drowned out by the kids fighting. It was as close to normal as he thought it might get, Elizabeth unusually quiet beside him until she blew up at Stevie. Blake was momentarily shocked, it was the most emotion he’d see out of her in two days, but now the kids were silent and staring. Her voice cracked and he realized he recognized what this was, the start of a spiral. Jumping to his feet, he pulled her up, making excuses as they headed for the stairs. Halfway up, he could hear her fighting to breathe, by the time she was in her room, he could see she was shaking.

“You’ve gotta hand it to me, that’s the first real snap since this started.”

“I know.” He followed her as she fled to the bathroom. “What’s going on?”

“You mean besides watching our lives go up in a nuclear flash?” She asked, louder than he would’ve liked. He pushed the door shut.

“Yeah, besides that. Is there something else?”

“I can’t believe after everything we went through; Gordon and Ellen still won’t budge on the hair trigger issue. Even with Russia’s cooperation. How were they not this traumatized by what happened?” She paced, pressing a hand to her chest. “Am I overreacting?”

“No. I don’t believe so.”

“What happens next time? Huh? Because there’ll be a next time! It’s happened before.” Her voice rose.

He reached out, trying to calm her down a bit. “Hey. Take a breath. Let’s think it out.” He rubbed her arms. “Right now, The Priesthood is holding all the cards, so… How can we make change happen? How do we make any change happen?”

“Uh, popular demand.”

“So, how do we get popular demand?”

She stilled as she thought, focusing her energy into working it out instead of pacing and panicking. “Education. Giving the people the information directly instead of through the filter of the people controlling the narrative.”

“Okay.” He agreed.

“But we can’t get popular demand because the other near misses, all of them, are classified. So, The Priesthood controls the narrative.” She smiled. “Ellen and Gordon are going to really hate me after this.”

“That’s never stopped you before.”

She shook her head, heading for the door. “No, and it won’t stop me now.”

==

The landmark deal struck with Russia about removing the hair trigger was celebrated, as usual, by a dinner. This time, Blake wasn’t met with any resistance in getting ready or leaving from Elizabeth. When they arrived, the staff joined them and stayed close, everyone pleased with the win. Russell wandered over to say his hellos and introduce someone to Elizabeth, then she turned and introduced Blake. “This is my friend, Blake Moran.” He was surprised but covered well. When he glanced back at his friends, their surprise was obvious, it was a change from always being introduced as her assistant.

When it was late enough that they could leave, Elizabeth had Matt and Toby head for the Lincoln Memorial instead of back to Georgetown. Confused about why, he followed her to the steps and sat beside her, waiting.

“I know you’re dying to ask why we’re here again.”

“I did wonder.” He admitted.

“I guess it felt appropriate.” She sighed, staring out toward the Washington Monument. “This whole past month has reminded me of the importance of civic duty, you know?”

“I do.”

“We did this huge thing, Blake. You and I, the team, two countries that usually are on opposite sides of things. And we all have a responsibility to make sure it doesn’t come undone.” She sighed and then went quite for several minutes. “Blake…”

He turned to look at her, waiting.

“When the time comes? I want to run for president.”

“I know.”

“You do?”

He nodded. “Honestly? I’ve been just waiting for you to be ready. I knew you’d get there, in time. I just had to keep everyone from pushing. But we’re all behind you, I hope you know that. The first woman president.” He smiled. “Not to mention single, widow, the lot. But you can do it. You will do it; I have faith in you.” He reached out and took her hand. “And as always, I’ll be right beside you.”

“Would you…” He could see she was suddenly fighting tears. “This weekend, I want to tell Henry I’m going to run. Would you go with me?”

“Of course.”


	30. Chapter 30

“They used to own a place down at the end there, they sold it off to friends, but they still go in season and stay. It would be my biggest nightmare if they were there now. This island is entirely too small to run into them on vacation.” Blake reclined on a lounger under an umbrella. Elizabeth was in the lounger beside him as they stared out at the water from the back lawn of the Dalton’s Martha’s Vineyard home. “I’m sorry. I warned you I’d be better left back in the city. This place tends to give me flashbacks of when I lived at home.”

Elizabeth laughed. “Relax, Blake. And really, it’s not like they can just walk over. We have Conrad’s Secret Service and my Diplomatic Security. And he was insistent that you come. You shouldn’t argue with POTUS.”

“Wise words to remember for the future, Blake.” Lydia was walking toward them with a tray of drinks. “The kids seem to be enjoying themselves.”

“How could they not?” Elizabeth took an offered drink.

“Gimlets, Connie’s about done with the grill.” When they both sipped their drinks and then gasped at the strength, she laughed. “They have a bite.”

They exchanged a look as she walked away. “Bite?” Blake asked. “I’ll be dead soon.” His phone beeped and he reached for it.

“No work, Blake.”

“It’s not, it’s Nadine.”

“Oh! Did she send a picture of that grandbaby?”

“It’s my phone, why would she send pictures to my phone?” He huffed. “Yes, there are pictures.” He held the phone out so she could see. “What did you say to her?”

“Why?”

“It says, and I quote, ‘why are you being cagey, what the hell is going on?’” He turned. “So, I ask again, what did you say to her?”

“You’ve been sneaky. You’ve been working extra, and no one will tell me anything about what you’ve been doing.” She groaned. “And it’s horrible that you live in my house and I have no idea what you are up to.”

“I am taking my impending firing seriously, that’s all you need to know.” He typed a reply to Nadine that he would call her later and not to worry.

“Okay. That’s good, because if I run, you’ll need options for what to do when I resign as Secretary.”

“When, not if.” He corrected. “And I plan on following you on your campaign and into the White House in some capacity.” He faced her again. “Depending on how things go.”

Elizabeth started to ask what that meant, but Russell strolled up. “It’d be good optics for you to be seen at the President’s side for the briefing, preparing to be the future leader of our country.”

“I shouldn’t have told you, Russell.”

“Go on.” Blake nudged her. “Go rule the world, I have my own things to work on a while, like my tan or maybe a dip in the water.”

“Tough life.” She laughed, getting up anyway. “I better not find out you two have been working together all this time.”

As they rounded the hedges, Blake could just make out Russell’s response. “Blake and I? Are you crazy?”

Alone, Blake relaxed back and stared out at the water. He had some concerns about what the future held; he just wasn’t sure how to find the answers. His phone caught his eye and he picked it up, maybe now was a good time to talk to someone who’d always been able to talk him through anything.

“When you said later, Blake, I thought you meant tomorrow.” Nadine greeted.

“Sorry, Elizabeth got called into a PBD so I’m free. Can I ask you something confidential? Not like officially confidential, but… well, it’ll make sense once I ask it.”

“Sure, shoot.”

“If Elizabeth wins the presidential election, where do I fit in? I want to work on her staff, but I currently live with her and I’m guessing it will be an either-or situation. I’m not sure what I want.”

“Wow. So many questions from that. I’m assuming the first bit is the confidential bit?”

“Yes.”

“Huh. She’s decided?”

“Has admitted it to at least three people, maybe four if Mike B knows.”

“Okay. I’ll store that one away for later.” He heard her hum as she thought. “As assistant or personal aide maybe you could have both? It’s unprecedented, but then so is she. I can think on it, I’m far enough removed now to do a little digging. I though you were changing jobs?”

“I’m applying for a position in policy advising. She’s wanting to expand her advising staff.”

“And you want something that keeps you on the inside.” She chuckled. “I doubt after over two years she’s going to kick you to the curb at this point.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I need to go, but thanks, Nadine. I miss having you around for more of these talks.”

“Take care.”


	31. Chapter 31

“Bess, we need to talk.” Russell entered her office, take out bags in his hand. “I’ve been quietly sourcing some polls and we have a few things we need to figure out ahead of your run.”

“I really wish I hadn’t told you already. It’s a year before I have to announce.”

He got settled on the sofa and waited for her to join him. “Yeah, well, we’re going to need that year. There are some questions about Henry.”

“Henry? My dead husband?” She laughed. “What questions can there possibly be?”

“Well, the mission he was on is classified. He was a veteran and a hero anyway, but once you announce, people will start asking questions abut his death. I already asked Conrad about declassifying enough to settle any nosey reporters.” He worked on his salad. “But there was more.”

“About Henry?”

“About you. About there being no signs of you ever in the company of anyone else.”

She laughed. “There’s a problem with me devoting my attention to the job instead of running around dating?”

“No. Well… Not that. It’s more that you are a single parent.”

“To adults.”

“And one person, even you, can only do so much. People are used to their presidents being married.”

“I am not getting married just to run for office.”

“I’m not saying that.” He shook his head. “Look. There was another thing, a little one that popped up in the bowels of the internet and then died there, but maybe it could help instead of hurt.”

“Oh, I’m not going to like the sound of this.”

“A nobody reporter with a gossip site was curious about Blake, namely his connection to you.”

“Russell.” She used a warning tone.

“He’s been living with you for, what, two and a half years? Come on, Bess, it could be the personal stability the nation needs to see to get them behind you. It doesn’t have to be anything sordid, just let them think they see that you have someone in your private life that helps manage everything.”

“No.”

“Bess.”

“I’m not using Blake. He’s got his own life.”

“When?!”

“He could have his own life.” She corrected. “He’s half my age.”

“And so are the wives of half of congress!”

“He’s been my personal assistant for years, Russell. Since before Henry died. And at some point, it would come out that I knew him almost two years prior to this job. Do you have any idea what that would look like? People would assume I’d been cheating on Henry before he died.” She looked up in time to see him give her a look. “If you ask me to confirm that I didn’t, so help me god, Russell, I will toss you off the roof.”

He held his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t ask.”

“You thought about it.”

“Fine. I don’t think it will be a big deal, though. But it would be good for people to see you happy and enjoying life. People like the whole, well rounded, picture and the last couple years, you haven’t given a lot of that.”

Blake entered the office just in time to catch the dirty look Elizabeth shot Russell. “Is this a bad time?”

She turned toward him, irritation clear on her face. “No. Russell was just explaining something he wants us to do before I declare.”

“What’s that?” He glanced between them.

“He wants us to start dating.”


	32. Chapter 32

Blake escorted Stevie and Elizabeth into the house, they’d just collected Stevie from the hospital after her collapse. “You need to go up and sleep in your bed.” He ordered.

“I just slept nine hours, you two on the other hand, have not. I can make you breakfast or something.”

“No!” Elizabeth insisted. “You collapsed in public, Stevie, after nearly being blown up, you don’t have to sleep, but you need to, I don’t know, watch panda cam or something. Where are you going? Where is she going?” She turned to Blake.

“I’m going to make tea.” Stevie answered. “You guys are the ones who need sleep.”

“She’s right.” Blake agreed reluctantly. “You’re on your second all-nighter.”

“I just…” Elizabeth sprawled out on the sofa. “I just need a minute and then I’ll get changed and we can go back.”

“Sleep.” He pulled the blanket off the back of the couch and draped it over her.

“You’re not going to sleep?” Her eyes were already closed.

“I told Jay I’d help him with a few things. I’m going to go change and probably head back right away.” He could tell she was already drifting off. Tracking his way through the first floor, he found Stevie waiting on the kettle. “You. No leaving this house until a doctor says otherwise. That was reckless.”

“I can’t sit around doing nothing.”

“It’s not doing nothing, it’s called _healing_. Also, don’t think I can’t see what else is going on.” He sighed when she gave him a confused look. “Flashbacks, nightmares, restlessness. You don’t think I don’t know what that looks like?”

“You’re not my dad, Blake.” She snapped.

“Stevie.” He stopped her when she tried to stalk away. “I’m not trying to be. I’m trying to tell you that you’re not alone with those experiences.” He waited for her to nod. “I do have to go change and get back; I’m leaving your mom asleep. Please try and not disturb her, I want her to sleep as long as she can. She’s been going nonstop the last few days and I’m worried she’ll be the next one in the hospital.”

“Okay.” She poured the water from the kettle into a pot. “Blake?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It’s been a rough few days for everyone.”

“Thanks for looking out for Mom too. I’ll look after her for a while.”

==

Elizabeth listened to her daughter talk about June and their last conversation together, taking the time to simply enjoy having the moment between them. “To help the next generation, you have to get rid of this myth that not being out front means you’re not powerful.” She picked up her mug of tea. “Let me ask you something, Stevie, who’s the most important, most powerful, person at State?”

She gave her mom a confused look and laughed. “You?”

A half smile crossed her face. “Not by a long shot. How about this- Where am I right now?”

“Sitting here with me?”

“Where’s the rest of my senior staff? Where’s Blake?”

“Uh, Blake went back to the office, I guess everyone else is there too?”

Elizabeth nodded. “Jay and Daisy both have daughters they haven’t seen in two days. You know Blake’s been running after you and me as well as his real job. So, who’s the most important person at State?”

“I don’t know?”

“All of them are. Sure, I get the attention, good or bad, but Matt writes the speeches I say, they all create the policies he writes about, and so on. I can tell you; they all are very important and are all pretty powerful.” She reached out and squeezed Stevie’s hand. “You don’t even want to know some of the things Nadine used to accomplish, she controlled things that never even made it to my desk, and powerful people in Washington were scared of her.”

“Really?”

She smiled. “Really. Even Russell gave her space. But you know he prefers women who fight back. She and June were a pretty dangerous pair.”

“I bet.” She stared into her mug. “I got upset with Blake earlier.” She admitted. “He was trying to reassure me about things, about having nightmares and stuff, but I snapped at him. I didn’t even think…”

“You didn’t think what, Stevie?”

“I didn’t think about how much he does? And he’s looked so worried the past week. I forgot he was there for you and watched you recover.”

“I put him through a lot.”

“And now I was mean to him for wanting to help.”

“Well, if there’s anything I’ve learned over the years, it’s Blake’s pretty easy on the forgiveness.” She finally stood to go change. “But I can tell you this; if you leave and end up in the ER again? You won’t like the Blake you get after that.” She shook her head.


	33. Chapter 33

“I got a lecture from Russell.” Blake met up with Elizabeth in the park, they’d arrived from different meetings in different buildings.

“What now?” She asked, slowing to fall into step beside him as they walked to their bench. “Or do I not want to know?”

“He was on the whole companionship thing again.” She groaned in frustration and he grinned. “Apparently we aren’t being convincing enough to ease the minds of whatever people he’s polling. Do we actually know anything about these polls?”

“We don’t. What, exactly, is Russell suggesting now?” She sat when they reached the bench. “I’m afraid to even ask that.”

He handed her the bag with lunch in it and sat beside her, putting one arm behind her along the bench, receiving a raised brow for it. “He thinks we should be a bit more ‘tactile’, his word.”

“This is ridiculous. Why haven’t we just told him to stuff his opinions?”

“Because I did my own research and he could have a point.”

“Wait, what?”

“I’m not divulging my sources. But I went deeper into what things might strike the right balance of giving the public the reassurance that you have a life to keep private without leading them to believe it’s something sordid.”

“Conspiring against me.”

“Looking at the bigger picture of getting you into the White House.”

She huffed but didn’t comment.

“It’s a year, which isn’t that long, and then almost a year of campaigning. No one is suggesting we suddenly run off and get married and start a whole new family.” He chuckled when she laughed. “The suggestions I got, not from Russell, were based on a lot of thought and taking into account your and my personal comfort levels.”

“So, what are we talking here then?”

“Aside from how we normally are? Dinner just the two of us a couple times, a vacation with or without the kids, honestly, that’s about it.”

“That’s not too bad. What’s the other part though?”

“Oh.” He was a bit more nervous about this part. “My source suggested ‘innocent affection’, their words. Hugs, linked arms, hand on the back, in the right moment, maybe even linked hands.”

“I’m a bit worried about your source, Blake.”

“My source is scarier than you, so they will be remaining anonymous.”

“Huh.” She finished her food. “Fine.” She agreed when the bag was disposed of and it was time to walk back. “Innocent affection.” She looped her hand into the bend of his elbow and let him lead her to the waiting SUVs. “I think I can handle that.”


	34. Chapter 34

“Why do we keep Matt around?”

Elizabeth turned, blinking at Blake a minute as she tried to decipher the question. “Well, first I have to ask which Matt, because Matt on my detail is kind of, you know, my bodyguard, and Matt on my staff is my speech writer.”

“Mahoney! He is driving me nuts and you’re not helping.”

“Me? What’d I do?”

He sagged his shoulders, dropping his head back in dramatic frustration. “Lorraine Sheridan.”

“Oh. That’s not me, that’s Mike B.”

“Matt thinks you’re dumping him.”

“Aww, tell him he’s still my guy.” She smirked. “Mike wants me to write a book.”

“When do you have time to write a book?”

“Hence, Lorraine Sheridan. And why would I dump Matt?”

“He thinks he’s out for the presidential run. I told him it’s just a rumor, but at some point you’re going to have to stop leading your staff, the people who are supposed to be behind you, every which way and clear it up.”

“I’ll get there.” She sighed. “Mike wants Lorraine to ghost write my book.”

“That’s…a horrible idea.”

His odd tone made her stop working on the dishes and look at him. “Why?”

“Because, uh, there are other people much better positioned to write a book about you.”

“Like?” When he didn’t answer, she stepped toward him. “Blake?”

“Me?” He felt himself blush. “I’ve been working on compilation for a while now.”

“How long?” This was all news to her.

“Uh, since your confirmation hearing?”

“What?!”

He carried on. “I’ve had this front seat to you as Secretary of State, the resistance to your confirmation, the peace treaties, Iran, Henry, all of it… I’ve seen what you’ve sacrificed to make things happen and I’ve watched as things chipped away at you. I’ve been there to see the celebrations and the days where we clung to anything good just to get through.”

“And you really want to take something like this on?”

He shrugged. “How hard can it be? I assemble five-hundred-page reports on the global impacts of sea salt, a few hundred on you should be a walk in the park.”

She was speechless. “Oh.”

==

Stepping out of the SUV, Blake turned around and helped Elizabeth out behind him, holding her close as they made their way into the theater. It was one of the nights out that Russell was always on about, getting a small amount of notice, not enough to make headlines, of Elizabeth out doing non-work things. He had to admit, it was fun to get to eat out and see a show on occasion, their lives didn’t often allow for such novel downtime.

“I think people are taking pictures.” Elizabeth whispered into his shoulder, turning her face away slightly at the intrusion. She understood the idea was to be seen, but she hadn’t expected anyone to honestly care enough to snap pictures.

Pulling her close, he ushered her in and toward the staircase that led to the private box. “Frank has it under control.” Once they were behind the closed door, he took her coat. “Normally it doesn’t bother you, what’s up?”

“I don’t know. It’s like, since that ad came out asking me to run, the attention seems…more.”

“That’s good though.”

“I know. Are you okay with it?”

“With what?”

“’ _The Secretary of State’s Longtime Companion’_? _”_ she quoted an online article. “I told Russell they would make assumptions.”

“Well. Here’s my thinking, the only person who needs to know the truth is Henry, and he’s gone. The kids know the truth. Maybe Henry’s family? I refuse to rise to any of it, no matter how grating or inflammatory. Mostly because engaging gives them more steam and if we aren’t ruffled, then the news cycle moves on.”

“Yeah.” She settled against his arm. “I hate it when you’re all reasonable and stuff.”

He laughed. “I know, but someone has to be and it’s unlikely to be you.”

“Hey!” She shifted to swat him, but he anticipated it and caught her hand. “Fine. No rising.”

“Thank you. Now, let’s enjoy this evening, I have a feeling our UN trip isn’t going to be a vacation.” He settled back to watch the performance.

When the show ended, they’d agreed with detail that they would wait until the theater cleared before trying to leave, so they had time to waste. Blake turned in his seat. “You look like you enjoyed it.”

“I did. And I know you liked the music.” She rested her head on his shoulder. “I’m glad you’re okay with this, Blake. I don’t know why the attention seems to be getting to me lately, it’s like, to do this job well undermines the appearance I need for that job and people are going to be so focused on my looks again, I hate that.” She paused. “And you’re so wonderful about putting up with me when I’m in one of these moods. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome and it’s my pleasure, really. Nowhere I’d rather be.”

“Really?”

“Well…” He got contemplative. “Perhaps somewhere with fine wine and, I don’t know, a butler and a chef.”

She giggled. “The White House has a chef, and I bet we can get wine from anywhere. And it has a bowling alley.”

“Well, that’s close enough then.”


	35. Chapter 35

Jay let himself into the Secretary’s office and pulled the door closed.

“How can I help you, Jay?” She asked as she carried on reading the paperwork in front of her.

“It’s about Blake.” When she instantly pushed the paperwork aside, he laughed, taking a seat. “He’s been beside himself about this firing thing, are you really seriously going through with it?”

“I seriously believe his skills are wasted as my receptionist.” She smiled at him. “I gave him a year. In that year I have seen him throw himself, reluctantly at first, into all sorts of different projects. I know he’s been helping Kat, and you, with tons of things.”

“He told you that?”

“No. But I do live with him, he’s working weekends, logging more hours than I do. I already did some digging, talked to POTUS, Russell, and a few other departments, about him being reassigned.” She sighed and sat back in her chair. “I’m guessing he’s been chasing you?”

“Made me do a practice interview with him. He’s been begging for any inside help to wow you. He’s so freaked out today he can barely speak.”

“Oh, I know. He couldn’t think of what to call me earlier.” She smirked. “It would’ve been endearing if he hadn’t gotten so upset about it. Now it’s just worrying.”

“So why not put him out of his, our, misery?”

“It’s good for him to stress it a bit. I want to see what he’s got under pressure.”

“He’s been your advisor for years though, he was your Chief of Staff for a few weeks.” He put his hands up in question. “What’s the hold out?”

She frowned. “Honestly?” She looked up as he nodded. “I’m worried about what will change.”

“Ma’am?”

“He’s been helping me for, what, over five years? He won’t be that guy anymore.”

Jay thought he understood. “I’m sure you’ll figure it out. And I really don’t see Blake changing just because he has different responsibilities around here.”

“True.” She conceded. “I think some of it is worrying about the future, the one we aren’t talking about. I think he’s been worrying about it too.”

“Well, my unsolicited advice is that you two need to discuss what is most important in that future and then plan back from there.”

“Yeah. You’re probably right.”

==

Elizabeth had managed to get the kids to go about their lives for the evening, leaving just she and Blake at home. After dinner, they curled up on the sofa in the den. “I want to seriously ask you something.” She turned to him, apprehensive. “If I get to the White House, what is the one biggest thing you want?”

“As in?”

“Do you want a certain position? Or… I don’t know. To keep living with me, I guess? I want to hear what you see happening in an ideal world. I worry that you’ve stuck around out of obligation or because you think it’s what I want.”

“I’ve been thinking… I can do a lot of jobs around the city, even within the White House, that wouldn’t be negatively impacted if I stayed with you.”

“Are you sure? I mean, as much as I love having you here, haven’t you put your life on hold enough?”

“Okay. I have a tiny confession to make.” He turned to face her fully. “My life hasn’t been as on hold as you seem to believe.”

“What?”

“Discretion has always been one of my superpowers.” He couldn’t help the grin when she looked shocked. “Sometimes when I say I’m meeting up with Jay or one of the others, I’m not. They lie for me if you mention plans you think I have with them. I’ve told you before, my life hasn’t really changed all that much.”

Elizabeth found herself speechless. “I… don’t even know what to say. You… date?”

“Yes.”

“And those people are okay with this?” She gestured between them.

“It generally doesn’t come up, but the odd person where it’s become relevant, I’ve explained in as few terms as possible that I cohabitate with a friend.”

“I… Never once considered that you would figure out a way to date under the radar.”

“I dated under the radar before I moved in. I’ve never been really out there with any relationship. In fact, ours has been the most public ever.” He let her process for a few minutes. “So… I’m pretty sure that while we’re in the White House, whether I’m just working there, or if I live there too, dating isn’t going to really happen. If I carry on being your plus one, I’ll be more seen and I don’t need reporters following me everywhere.”

“Wow.” She shook her head. “I seriously never considered that.” She tipped her head. “So, anyone interesting?”

He laughed. “There was a guy in a class I was auditing last semester, we got in a habit of going for coffee after. He was pretty interesting; I dazzled him with knowledge of foreign policy in the Pacific. It was mostly class-based interest so, once the class ended, it fizzled pretty fast.” He sighed. “It was fun though. So, when I tell you that I’m happy here for now, you can understand that I’m not cloistered away, giving up everything. There really could come a day when I decide I want something else.”

“Okay. Got it.”

“And I plan to totally take advantage of the Rockstar life on the campaign trail. A new city every night, anonymous hotel rooms, the mystery of there today, gone tomorrow. Every guy’s dream.”

“Sewing your wild oats?” She laughed.

“Might as well enjoy the journey.”


	36. Chapter 36

“Nina.” Blake anxiously stood next to what, only three days ago, had been his desk. “I was thinking we should grab lunch, you and I.” He tried hard not to stare at the mountains of paperwork all over the desk’s surface.

“Sure!” She beamed up at him. “I’m about ready to head out anyway, let me go tell the Secretary.” She scampered to the door and he listened as she shared that the two of them were stepping out, though he couldn’t hear Elizabeth’s reply. “Let’s go.”

He led the way to the elevator and down to the ground level, heading for the exit, deciding that walking to a nearby restaurant might be nice.

“I know you don’t really like me.” Nina’s admission startled him.

“No! It’s- it’s not you, I swear. Look… You made sense, about the filing system and… I’ll adapt. Just, please give me more than a couple days before you take me personally, okay?” He looked her way briefly. “I know I’m weird, and rigid, and a lot of other things, believe me, the others have never been shy about telling me. And Matt’s pointed out twice today that I need to ease up, I’m just having a hard time figuring my new space out too. And I want to start by saying I am sorry for anything I did to make you feel not welcome or like I don’t like you.” He led her into a café. “I was hoping we could talk and maybe we could find a system, where we work together?”

“I- I guess so? I honestly would have thought you would’ve been glad to be moving up.”

“Oh, I am. But there’s… there’s something that, as part of the senior staff, is something you kind of need to know. And maybe once you know, it’ll make more sense?” He waited until they were seated before carrying on. “The Secretary’s husband, Henry died a few years ago.”

“Yeah, I heard. A tragedy.” She sighed. “I saw she still has photos of him in the office.”

He nodded. “There’s a whole lot more to the explanation, but the short version is I moved in and have lived with her ever since. So, it’s a bit weird to still be that person there for her after hours and then suddenly the last few days I’m not that person during the day. A-And like I said, I’ll get there, I swear to you. I just didn’t expect the transition to be so hard.” He huffed. “When I was sorting out the mosquito net situation, Matt said something to me that made sense, as much as that really irritates me.” He smirked so she knew he was teasing. “So, I wanted to see if we can’t figure out a common enemy we can work together on.”

“What did you have in mind?”

“Well, and you can’t ever tell her I said this, but we could view Elizabeth as the common enemy.” When she gave him an odd look, he realized his slip. “Sorry, the Secretary.” He sipped his water. “We split certain things and I swear I will not step a toe over the agreed line.”

“Examples?” They both began working on their meals.

“I will get over the breakroom organization situation, though I do have to warn you, sometimes totally reorganizing a space like that helps me work through problems like with the mosquito thing. But I will keep making the good coffee, which everyone knows to leave for just the senior staffers.”

Nina nodded. “I can live with that. And the organizing doesn’t bother me, not really. I get it though, sometimes undoing a physical mess helps undo the mental one.”

Blake smiled, glad she understood. “And I promise to correct my attitude, I think I’ve been a bit rude so far.”

“No, you’ve been fine.”

He raised a brow at her, he didn’t believe that for a minute, but he let it go. “I’ll work harder to stick to my new job; you don’t need me watching over your shoulder. You were the best applicant by far for the job and I have to get over myself and let you keep at it.”

“Only if you will still give me advice when I have a question? It takes forever to learn all the little nuances about what your boss likes and doesn’t like, when to anticipate something, and having you on hand will maybe make me look better by being able to ask and learn that much faster.” She grinned at him again. “I really want her to like me. And be impressed with my work.”

“Oh, she already is.”

“Really?” She lit up.

“Really. I know it’s only been a few days, but we all are really glad you’re on the team. We’ll get around to taking you out for drinks to celebrate, I promise, it’s in the works.” He checked his watch. “We should be getting back. Listen, if I do say or do something that undermines your space, please speak up. And if you feel like you can’t talk to me, trust me, you can go to literally any of the others and they’ll come deal with me.”

Nina seemed surprised. “Okay. I’ll remember that.”

==

Blake was reheating leftovers when Elizabeth entered the kitchen with a glass of wine in one hand and the open bottle in the other. “So, you and Nina had lunch today. Anything to do with the breakroom crisis?”

“You heard about that?”

“Are you kidding? Matt practically ran in to tell me.” She watched him frown. “No. Leave him be. He was worried for you, but it looks like you and Nina dealt with it?”

“I decided, after conversations with Jay and Matt, that the first step was to apologize for my behavior and try to explain why I was having such a hard time letting go.” He pulled his food out and turned to look for a fork. “And then we worked it out together because, as it was pointed out to me, fighting never solves anything until there are dead bodies to bury.”

“That’s a rather… gruesome take in it. But I’m happy you worked it out.” She pulled a second glass out of the cabinet and poured him some wine. “And this will be good for us. I mean, technically now you report to Jay, not me. And despite what you feel, I am capable of doing a lot on my own, you’ve spoiled me a long time, but I’ll survive.”

“See, I know that. It’s my own pathological need to be in control all the time that’s the problem. And I need to deal with it, this is just forcing me to improve myself.”

“Wow, that must’ve been some talk.” She laughed.

He couldn’t help the slight smile. “Oh, no. After I left today, I called Nadine. Among other things, I was told to grow up and to get over myself.” He huffed. “She wasn’t willing to indulge my feeling sorry for myself.”

“Not sure why you expected she would.”

“Fair point.” He sagged against the counter, placing the plate to the side. “The past few days have been long, and hard, and I love policy and I loved doing the mosquito net thing, even though it got taken over by an NGO in the end. It was a puzzle and it was fun. It’s all this other emotional stuff.”

“Well, come on. We’re off the clock now, so we can sit and watch something on the cooking channel and relax.” She tugged him to the den, finding the remote while he got comfortable. Doubling back to the kitchen, she brought his plate in with two forks, sitting curled into his side as she held the plate in one hand so they could both eat from it. “See.” She started again at the first commercial break. “We still come home to this. It won’t be so bad.”

==

Blake was the last one to turn up at the bar. He greeted the others and flagged someone down to place his drink order. “Is Kat just living in New York now?”

“Pretty much.” Jay answered. “Which is good, actually, she owns those UN halls.”

“So.” Daisy turned to Nina. She’d been working with them two weeks already. “This is your official welcome to the team.” She raised her glass.

“Thank you!” Nina raised hers as well. “I can’t believe I got so lucky, honestly. When the position went up, I knew there would be tons of people applying for it. And I figured a lot of them would have much more impressive resumes than me.”

They all laughed as Jay answered. “There’s more to a person than what’s on paper. And there’s a little bit of a tradition now in the inner circle of hiring the dark, or dark-er, horse. I think most of us were the long shot when we came onboard.”

“Really?” That surprised her, she’d already been repeatedly impressed with how capable her new coworkers were.

Matt took a swig of his drink. “Jay is patron saint of the long shot. If he can’t get it done, it can’t be done.”

“Ohh! That makes the Secretary’s comment about reaching too far a few weeks ago make sense. She was all into it until Jay couldn’t pull it together. That’s awesome to know.”

“I swear I have no idea where that nickname came from.” Jay defended.

“But it’s accurate.” Daisy bantered back. She looked over when Blake’s phone went off. “Problem?”

He shook his head. “No, I’ll be right back. I think I know what it’s about, it’s Alison.” He slipped away from the table to step outside so he could hear his phone.

Nina seized the opportunity. “Is it weird or no? Blake mentioned in passing his living arrangement?”

The other three shared a look before Daisy answered. “I don’t think it’s ever been weird?”

“I think it’s been weirder the last few weeks.” Matt admitted. “It was never talked about before and with the promotion, Blake for the first time ever was mentioning.”

“But it wasn’t a secret, was it?” She suddenly wondered if she shouldn’t have asked.

“No.” Jay shook his head. “It’s not a secret. You’re fine. We just…” He waved his hand a bit as he thought. “It’s been years, for us it just is the way it is.”

“Oh, okay.” She sighed in relief. “Blake’s pretty awesome, I’m glad he and I worked things out.” She confessed. “And, Alison is the Secretary’s daughter that’s off at college, right?” She was doing her best to remember everything important.

“Yes.” Blake answered as he rejoined them. “Sorry. She’s studying fashion. She had a paper due and had a question.” He vaguely explained his momentary absence.

“A fashion question?” Matt wondered.

“Finance, actually. The program also teaches the business side of things, so she’s taking finance courses along with the design side.” He smiled. “When Elizabeth saw Ali’s semester schedule and the two finance classes, she rolled her eyes and told me she expected me to help out. It’s been nice to flex those mental muscles a bit.” He put his phone away. “Sorry. Where were we?”

“We left off at picking on Jay.” Matt continued. “What else does Nina need to know about him?”

“Remember there, Matt, that I can fire you now.” The warning was accompanied by a grin.

==

Hours later, when Blake managed to make his way home, he dropped his coat on the hook as found his way to his desk, weariness keeping him from wanting to climb the stairs just yet. The night out had cemented Nina’s place in their circle, and he’d been thrilled to discover she was witty and loved music too. And, if he were honest with himself, when he first started at State, he was pretty nervous and soft spoken as well, so he couldn’t fault her for that. Or for the natural missteps that would happen as she grew into the position. By the time they’d all gone their separate ways, he’d realized he was happy to be handing over the role to her. He just needed to work harder at showing it.

Listening to the almost silent house, he tried to remember where the kids were tonight. Jason, if he recalled correctly, was spending the weekend with friends, and he knew Ali was still probably pouring over that paper in her dorm. Since the bombing, Stevie had been home more. Blake decided he didn’t want to fall asleep at the desk, which would happen soon if he didn’t get a move on, so he pushed himself up and trudged up the front stairs, stopping when he noticed the master bedroom light still on.

Pausing in the doorway, he smiled softly. Elizabeth was sound asleep, paperwork beside her on the bed, and glasses perched on her nose. He guessed she’d been waiting up for him. Entering, he stacked the files on the vanity and then made sure her phone was plugged in before easing her glasses off and reaching for the lamp switch. He glanced around the room quickly to see of there was anything else out of place and spotted something else caught up in the blankets at the end of the bed. Not wanting whatever it was damaged, he pulled it out only to realize it was the book he’d given her full of photos, open to one of the last pages. The way the edges were folded, he could guess it was a page that was viewed a lot. It was a simple candid photo, something that Matt, of all people, had snapped with his nice camera. They’d been leaving for a dinner, still at the State Department, and Henry had met them there to surprise his wife. The photo caught her absolute delight when Henry wrapped his arms around her, catching her off guard and making her laugh.

Blake stared at the picture a minute. He could still hear their laughter and the way everyone else had laughed as well, caught up in the joy of the moment. It had been only a few months before Henry was gone, but it felt like it was part of another lifetime.

Finally pulling his attention away, he set the book carefully on top of the files, keeping it open to the right page. He backtracked down to the office and pulled his laptop out of his bag and took it to his room so he could begin typing up an idea he had.


	37. Chapter 37

“Where is he?!”

Nina jumped at the bellowed words as Russell raced toward her. “Uh, Sir?” She nervously questioned.

“Blake! Where the hell is he?” He flung his arms out, encompassing the floor. “Now!”

“Um.” She looked around at her desk. “I- I don’t know. Sir. I- I’m sorry. Sir.” She stared up at him, eyes wide.

“How the hell can you not know where he is?! Your boss in in jail in Arizona! Do you understand what kind of disaster this has turned into?!” He leaned in, making her cower back in her seat. “I need-”

“Stop shouting at her.” A firm but forceful voice cut Russell off.

Both of them turned, Blake was standing just inside the doorway halfway up the room, arms crossed over his chest and face set into something steely that Nina didn’t recognize on her normally calm coworker.

“You know better than to pull that in here.” Blake carried on in the same disturbingly calm voice once he had Russell’s attention. “Once you remember your manners, I will happily share with you what we are already doing to get ahead of this situation.” He turned on his heel and started to walk away, effectively dismissing the older man.

Nina watched them both, unsure what to expect next. A large part of her expected the Chief of Staff to simply blow up at Blake next, or perhaps turn back to sneer at her. What she didn’t expect was for him to hesitate, watching Blake vanish before looking back at her.

“I’m sorry.” He directed it her at considerably lower volume than he’d entered with. “I’ll try not to let it happen again.” She watched him start to walk away before stopped yet again. “We might need you for a few things.” He gestured through the doorway Blake had disappeared through.

Stunned at the rapid transformation, Nina nodded and grabbed a pen and pad of paper before reluctantly rushing after him, finding herself in Jay’s office. From the doorway, she could see Blake turn when Russell entered, frowning at him before catching sight of Nina. “An apology requires more than just words, Russell.” He stated before moving on to the problem at hand. “Daisy already has her support staff helping field all articles, reports, everything. Unfortunately, it was on live TV, so mostly she and Matt are just dealing with creating statements to prevent the media fires from turning into raging infernos. Kat is running point in Arizona, as much as she can, and Jay and I are combing through every policy option that has every existed to try and get out ahead of the next twist in this saga.”

Nina watched as Russell simply stared a second before responding. “That was fast.”

Blake scoffed.

“We’ve been jumping ahead of the Secretary’s derailed plans for years; it’s been like practicing for the Olympics.” Jay answered. “We’ll fix it and get everything back on track, just give us a minute.”

“We don’t have a minute. Conrad wants to send in the military to get her out.”

“That’s a horrible idea.” Jay shook his head. “That’ll make this inferno into a bomb. We need to let it cool down, not engage.”

“What’s the plan then?”

“I called Mike B. I want to send him down to be her personal lawyer.” Blake admitted. “If federal lawyers go, it’s a showdown. Mike B as a private attorney will draw considerably less attention.”

Nina watched Russell stand still for a minute, thinking, before he spoke directly to Blake. “You go too. Make her see reason.” He paused. “And… thank you.” Nina saw Blake nod before Russell spoke again. “Also, I’m sorry.”

“We’ll get her home, more of less in one piece.”

Russell made a small noise that Nina suspected was nearly a chuckle. “I would prefer more over less.” He turned to leave, stopping when he realized Nina was still in the doorway. “Right.” He sighed. “Coffee or tea?’

“Oh. Uh…” She glanced past him at Blake, who gave her a small nod. “Tea. Sir.”

“Right.” He repeated, passing her without anything further.

Slowly, she turned back to the pair still in the office. “I- I never expected an apology from someone like him.” She admitted.

That brought a grin to Jay’s face as he turned and looked up at Blake. “I take it Blake ‘handled it’?” He used finger quotes.

“He’ll get over it.” Blake waved off. “And I was far more polite than what he was being. Mike B should be here any minute and if I’m flying to Arizona, then I have to go by the house and pack and make sure the kids are all updated. I’ll have my phone, keep me up to date on the next crisis as it unfolds.”

“Sure thing. Good luck.” Jay dismissed before adding more. “Dark Prince of State.” Earning a glare as Blake left. Once it was just the two of them, he turned to Nina. “You okay? I know Russell can be a force when he gets like that.”

“I- I’ll be fine. Promise. I’ve seen him on a tear before, though it was never aimed at me. Actually… Blake was kind of terrifying too. I mean, he wasn’t yelling like Mister Jackson, but he looked so angry.”

==

Halfway through the cross-country flight, Blake pulled his headphones out of his ears and leaned toward Mike B. They were in first class; he’d pulled some strings to get them on the first one out. “Look, I know you want to lay into her once we get there, believe me, I get it, and any other time I would be fine but I think this time you need to tread lightly.”

“And why is that?” He leaned in, lowering his voice. “You do remember what’s riding on this, right? I’m not the only one here with a lot to lose if this blows up into an unmitigated nightmare.”

“Thirty years.”

“What?” Mike’s face contorted in confusion.

“Their anniversary.” He turned, watching as Mike grasped what he meant. “I didn’t put it together before today. I think there could be more at play and I think until we figure that out, we need to tread lightly.”

“Yeah. Okay. I still think she needs sense shaken into her. There had to be a thousand ways to sort this out without getting herself arr- caught.”

“Oh. I agree with you.” He sat back in his seat. “I just think if we do, she’ll dig in or shut down.”

“Right.” He sat back as well. “What do you suggest then?”

“I have no idea.”

==

“Hey.” Kat met them in the hall. “She’s this way. I’ve been trying to run interference and keep the situation from getting any worse.” She caught Blake’s arm before he got to the door. “I really need to warn you about what we saw in there. Literally, it was like being at the pound, but cages of little kids. Chain link fences, on mats on the floor, locked up, the ones who couldn’t manage the bathroom themselves sitting in their mess. That… That was the one that just really got to her I think.”

“Everyone else is working on that issue, keep in touch with them. Right now, I’m working on this issue of trying to get her out of jail, so if you want to head back to DC, I don’t see why it would be a problem if you left. If anything needs handled out here, I can do it.”

“Sure, I’ll talk to Jay.”

Turning to the door, Blake entered the open room, spotting Elizabeth instantly. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

Mike dove right in as they moved to a somewhat more private part of the room. Blake stayed to the side as they disputed how to proceed and then Mike stormed out, shooting him a last, begging, glance before he left.

He led her to a chair and took a seat beside her. “I am on your side, one hundred percent.” He started. “I think Mike B has some valid points, but at the end of the day, you have to decide what you want to do.”

“You should’ve seen those kids, Blake.”

“I understand.” He sighed, shifting in his chair so he could rest an arm behind her. “A small part of me wonders if perhaps you came out here already not in the best frame of mind?” When she didn’t comment either way, he pressed. “I remember the date.”

“Oh.”

“So? Maybe there could be more going into all this?”

“It was the right thing to do.” When he didn’t comment, she frowned. “You might be right.”

==

Two days later, they were on the plane headed home. Her detail, who had not been amused about the whole thing, and Mike B, were all in the back, leaving just the two of them at the front. Blake was surprised when Elizabeth took the seat directly next to his, lifting his arm and tucking herself against him.

“I’ve been dreaming about Henry lately. His smile, his laugh. The memories of him are fading in some ways, but in my dreams, they’re clear. Some nights we spend the whole night just sitting together in them. I’ve- I’ve also been looking at that book you gave me. Especially this past month or so. It doesn’t hurt anymore like it used to, they’re just memories now.” She admitted to him.

Shifting, he wrapped both arms around her. “I wish you would have told me sooner. We could have looked at photos and talked about him together.”

“You would have been okay with that?”

“Of course. Now, why don’t you sleep for a bit, I doubt you slept much in jail and Stevie has been determined to keep the Christmas party on track. She’s worked hard to pull this together and it’s more important this year than last.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” She agreed, getting comfortable against him so she could try and rest.

==

As Elizabeth moved back to the other room after formally sharing her intent to run, the rest of the staff turned and stared at Blake. He lifted his drink to his lips. “I am so freaking glad she finally said that out loud.” They all laughed. “No, really. I’ve been waiting like six months. The announcement alone deserves a celebration.” He scooted past Daisy and refilled his glass, offering the bottle to the others to top up. “I propose a toast.” He lifted his glass. “To the worst job on earth, and the best people to do it with.”

“And in in a few months, the job will get harder.” Matt added as they all toasted except Jay. “Now let’s get plastered, because we so deserve it.”

“I second that!” Kat put up her crab puff before eating it.

“I would third it, but I can’t drink.” Jay frowned. “I have some pain medicine that would make it fun though.”

“Does that medicine have anything to do with your new lobbyist buddy?” Daisy asked him.

“I plead the fifth.”

They all began to scatter to find more food, but Daisy caught Blake by the arm and hauled him to the side. “What’s going on?”

He was thoroughly confused. “With what?”

“That look you had. Earlier? When she was standing there talking about running and you were staring at her like she was the only person in the room?” She stared at him. “You didn’t even know you were doing it, did you?”

“I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about. Truly, no clue.”

“Well, you need to get a clue then and get that look of your face or people are going to start to see and start to talk!” She hissed, her voice low. “Because to anyone else, it looked like you’re in love with her.”

“Daisy come on! She’s my friend. She lost her husband.” He stammered.

“She’s your best friend, and you hers; don’t even try to deny it. You two are impossibly close, and he died almost three years ago. That’s a long time, Blake. I’m fairly sure that those excuses don’t fly anymore.” When his mouth opened and closed, but no more words came out, she shook her head, patting her chest. “Work it out, Blake.”

“Yeah.”

==

“Where did the kids go?”

Blake trailed into the kitchen behind Elizabeth. “Stevie is dealing with the last of the catering people, the other two went to bed a while ago.” He glanced toward the front room. “And Jay I believe passed out from pain medicine on the den sofa.” When she snorted, he arched a brow at her.

“I went to college. Hell, I worked at a college. I know what high looks like.”

“Yeah, well. What we all don’t know won’t bite us in the ass. Kat went home to be with her kid, and I think Matt and Daisy are in the front room?”

“Full house. Just one question though?”

“What’s that?”

“When did my staffers become my kids?”

He laughed. “When they were so relieved to hear you admit you will be running that they decided to unload your caterers of all their surplus alcohol.”

“Right.”

He headed for the stairs. “Shall we?” When she joined him, he pulled her close, keeping his arm around her waist as they walked up. “I’m happy the party went well for you and I’m so thankful you finally made the little announcement.” He turned, still holding her in place, and stared down at her. When she looked up at him, the content smile on her face that he’d grown so accustomed to, her hand on his arm, he remembered the words Daisy had said. Swallowing, he pulled away. “Well, good night.”

She looked somewhat confused, but bid him goodnight as well, slipping to her own room.

Shutting his bedroom door, Blake sat on the bed and sagged, elbows on his knees as he rubbed his face.


	38. Chapter 38

As the rest of the staff trailed out of Elizabeth’s office after Jay’s exuberant departure, Blake turned back to Elizabeth where she stood behind her desk, Chloe in her chair, and smiled. The young girl reminded him a bit of Annie. He’d been going nonstop since the beginning of the year, they all had, and this small win felt like the first moment in a while he could just breathe.

“I haven’t seen you smile like that in a while, Blake.”

His eyes snapped to hers. “Sorry?” She was completely focus on him, the intensity as she tried to read him was uncomfortable and he looked instantly away.

“You. You’ve been less happy lately. Since the holidays.” She looked down at Chloe, turning her fingers through her hair, and then back to him. “Is it because Will ended up cancelling last minute and didn’t bring Annie?”

“No. It’s nothing. So, now that we have a spare small child for the day, what are our plans?” He tried to redirect the conversation. There were no plans to ever say aloud the things that had been plaguing him, it was his own issue and he had no intention to ever out it out there for anyone else to judge.

“Blake.” Elizabeth crossed to him, reaching out and then giving him a puzzled look when he dodged her touch. “Yeah, something’s going on, come on.” She took his arm that time, leading him to the sofa and nudging him down. “Did I do something? Because if I did, I’m sorry.”

Blake didn’t fight it, doing so would only make the situation escalate and really, there was no reason to put anyone through that. Especially with Jay’s daughter in the room. He watched Chloe color a picture for a few minutes, trying and failing to organize his thoughts into something that would satisfy her concern without leaving himself feeling exposed. “I- I got called out, so to speak, on something I wasn’t aware I was doing and… It left me off kilter when I realized the person was correct and I hadn’t even been aware of it.” He stared at his hands in his lap for several minutes. “I’m still trying to figure it out. I didn’t realize it was affecting my work, I’m sorry.”

“You know you can tell me anything.”

“Not this.” He replied quickly. Too quickly. He squeezed his eyes shut and turned his face away, angry with himself for revealing so much in those two words.

That caught her attention and she studied him. “Because… it has to do with me?”

He didn’t answer her question, instead he shifted the subject back to Chloe. “I can’t believe how big she is. It seems like only yesterday Jay was calling us from the hospital.” Back then, even in the turmoil they were all experiencing, watching, seeing those first pictures of Chloe had been a light in their day. Blake had tried to casually ask Jay about it, about being a father, whenever he’d had the chance. He’d even gone so far as to offer to be his friend’s sounding board just to have that slightest impression of what it felt like.

“They grow up fast. I barely remember him announcing it.”

“You had a lot going on then.” He acknowledged. “It feels like all the best things since taking this job have been marred by something bad happening in conjunction.”

“Or maybe… The bad things are made less bad because something good happened to lessen the blow.” She looked him over and realized that he would simply continue to change the subject, so she let it go for now. “Hey, Chloe? How would you like to go to the White House for a visit? You can draw the President a picture.”

“Okay!” Chloe scrambled out of the chair, gathering the colored pencils.

“Get your coat, I’ll help you with your toys.” Elizabeth left Blake on the sofa and moved to gather everything. Once Chloe was bundled up, she turned back to him. “You coming with us? I just need to touch base with Dalton which won’t take long, then I’m headed home.” She wasn’t surprised when he shook his head and made an excuse for going home on his own. Whatever was eating at him would have to wait.

==

Elizabeth and Conrad watched Chloe coloring at his desk. Shifting the conversation away from world events, he smiled at her. “A woman looks pretty good behind that desk.”

Elizabeth laughed. “She’s got about thirty-one years before she’s ready for that.”

“But by then, she won’t be the first one.” He turned his face to Elizabeth. “You and maybe others will have blazed that trail ahead of her.”

“I hope.” Her doubtful response made him simply shake his head. He had much more confidence in her success than she still did.

“Now that you won’t be spending your day trying to avert civil war, what are your plans? Give me something to dream about for my retirement.”

“I wasn’t expecting to have Chloe today, so I’m not sure. Something fun.” Her smile faded slightly. “I think I have other issues going on that I wasn’t even aware of until an hour ago, I may end up spending my weekend digging through that.”

“Trouble with the kids?” He asked, concerned.

“No, Blake.” She sighed. “I can’t put my finger on it. We’ll work it out, whatever it is.”

“I’m sure you will. Well, take Chloe home, enjoy your weekend, Bess.” He stood and she followed. “I’ll see you Monday.”

==

Elizabeth barely saw Blake once she and Chloe got home. He stayed shut away in his room most of the day and she’d been too busy keeping Jay’s daughter entertained, so it wasn’t until Jay had collected her late in the evening that she had a chance to go looking.

“Blake? Jay picked up Chloe.” She knocked on his partly open door but got no answer. Pushing the door open a bit more she found him asleep already across his bed, he’d obviously been working on his laptop and had dozed off. On the table beside him was a glass and a bottle of scotch. It was surprising to see that he’d opted to sit up there alone instead of hanging out with she and Chloe and it made her worry more.

She knew that he’d cleared away her work many times over the years when she’d fallen asleep, so she moved to do the same. His laptop woke up and she caught sight of what he’d been looking at, search results for condos in the area. Closing the top down quickly, she felt guilty for having looked, but also concerned that something was gong on that he didn’t want to talk about. She’d told him more than once that if he ever wanted to move on with his own life, she’d understand. So why was he being so secretive about it?

Just as she was reaching for the switch on his lamp, Blake rolled over still mostly asleep and looking somewhat confuse that she was in the room. “Sorry, was just turning your light off.”

“Yeah.” He mumbled, rubbing his eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” He truly hadn’t planned to fall asleep, but he’d been unable to face what he knew would have been Elizabeth’s concerned glances as they entertained Chloe. He could remember he’d drifted off listening to her excited chatter wafting up the stairs.

“Are you really okay?” She tried, hoping he would talk. “If I did something to make you feel uncomfortable, I’m sorry. And I- If you felt like you couldn’t just say you wanted to get your own place, well, I never intended to make you feel like you didn’t have that choice.”

Blake squinted at her. “What?” He didn’t understand where that came from.

“I saw what you were searching when I moved your computer. I wasn’t snooping, it was an accident.”

He sighed, shifting around so he was sitting up properly. “It’s not you and I’d really rather not have this conversation while sitting on my bed.” He looked longingly at his bedside table. “And perhaps with a few more glasses of scotch.” Or never, that was a choice he was willing to pick as well. This thing in his brain was his to deal with. Daisy’s words bothered him, but a simple change in behavior would fix everything. He’d tried that though and Elizabeth was already questioning what was wrong.

Making a decision, she collected the bottle and glass. “Come on, let’s go talk.” When he didn’t move, she motioned with her free hand. “Up, up. Make sure you have shoes and grab your coat.”

“Why?”

“We’re going for a walk. You won’t have to face me, and the fresh air might help.”

“It’s nearly freezing!”

“You’ll live. When we get back you can have your glass back and warm up all you like.”

Ten minutes later, Blake found himself strolling through the neighborhood as alone as he could ever expect. Two agents were walking ahead of them and two more trailing behind. Elizabeth had informed them that she and Blake would need some privacy and could they please walk at a distance. He tightened his scarf inside his upturned collar and jammed his hands into his pockets. They were already a block away when he decided to just start and see what came out. “Daisy told me every time I look at you, it looks to everyone else like I love you and I didn’t even know I was doing anything different. She told me to figure it out before people start spreading rumors or asking questions and I just… I didn’t believe her at first but later on that night you were saying something and I… I was totally blindsided.” He raised his shoulders, wishing he could hide now in his coat collar.

Elizabeth didn’t respond for several houses. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he watched her lift her chin, shaking her hair back a bit without unfolding her arms. “Love or in love?” His head whipped around, confused, and then she continued. “I love Will, I love my kids; I’m sure that’s obvious to anyone. I love all my closest friends; Nadine, Mike, Juliet even though our friendship has changed into something so… I can go on. I loved Yousif, though I was never in love with him. But I was in love with Henry.” Blake thought about that until she broke the silence again. “So…love or in love? Because I can say without a doubt that I love you, Blake. You are one of my closest friends, how could I not?”

“I- I hadn’t thought about it like that.” He admitted.

“I’m guessing Daisy dove in with that tone she uses, like whatever she’s saying is a crisis that risks global collapse?” She turned enough to catch him nod. “Yeah, I have to remember to keep my head on straight when she does that to me too.” She turned back to watching the sidewalk. “Is this what was making you look for condos? Because, if you seriously want to move because _you_ want to, then we can make calls and probably see a few tomorrow. And I will exuberantly support that choice, because you deserve to do what makes you happy. You’ve done more than enough for me, Blake. But if you were looking because of what _Daisy_ said, well, maybe hold off a bit.” She tugged her scarf tighter around her neck. “At least be sure it’s what you want without the influence of her opinions.”

“I may have freaked out a little bit because of her.” He felt a small smile tug at his lips. “It was the night of the party, so there were a couple of glasses of champagne involved as well and I guess I was grinning wrong or something when you said you were planning to run and she got all worked up over it.” He shrugged. “I was so happy you finally announced to the team that you will be running. I was happy that mess in Arizona was over. And I was happy to see you so happy.”

“Okay.” She breached the small space between them and looped one arm around his back, leaning closer when his arm curled around her shoulders. “So, you freaked out because of Daisy. And then?”

“And then I realized that I did love you and that was about where I started to plan out running away to some country you would be unable to follow me to. You’re generally well liked, it was proving to be an incredibly short list.”

Elizabeth laughed. “I’m glad you didn’t just run away. I’m not willing to lose any more friends without a fight. And I will, fight for our friendship that is. And for your happiness. Your success. Like I forced you to look at bigger and better things for your career. I worry about you, that you tend to be a creature of habit and comfort and if I don’t eventually push you to focus on you first, that you’ll accept staying where you are forever.”

He couldn’t assemble a reply to that. He did tend to be a creature of habit; it was one of the reasons his transition had been initially hard. They walked in silence for a while and then Blake felt her shiver where she was leaned against his shoulder. “We should get back; it’s freezing out here.”

“Are we good now?” She looked up at him.

“I think we’re good.” The smile came easier this time.


	39. Chapter 39

“Why did we decide to do this on a Sunday morning?” Elizabeth’s voice filtered down the hall. “I get why it can’t be official business, but I’m starting to feel like I live with more of my staff than just you.”

Blake laughed, making his way from his own room to hers, sitting on the bench at the end of her bed. “I would promise it will get better, but you have Mike B as your campaign manager so I’m pretty sure it won’t. He’s already downstairs by the way.” After month of secret meetings and conversations, and more than a few nights of Elizabeth trying to talk herself out of running, they were finally launching. It was the meeting that would start the clock to ending their tenure at State for a few of them, himself included. Kat would be staying on at State with the transition team, though she was helping him organize the policy agenda details for which he was endlessly grateful.

“He is?” She appeared from the bathroom in dark jeans and a t-shirt. “When did he get here?”

“Uh, not sure. Stevie’s cooking, I think she let him in. Or security is so used to him now that they just let him waltz in.” It felt like Mike was at the house nearly daily. He wanted to be irritated at the intrusion of the man into the small amount of personal space he had, but Blake realized that they would be working closely in the coming year, travelling together for weeks at a time, and he did his best to suck it up.

She got contemplative. “I should talk to them about that.” There was a beat of silence and then she seemed to shake herself back to the present. “You’re dressed up. Should I wear something more…nice?”

“You’re fine. I just felt like the campaign meetings needed me to be in work mode, not like I’m at home about to have a beer… I’ll save that for after it’s over.” They both laughed.

Mike’s voice drifted up from the first floor and Elizabeth sighed. “Let’s get this started.”

He walked beside her down the front stairs. “I’ll make sure everything is organized, Stevie said she would have breakfast for you, so why don’t you eat before we get down to business.”

“I thought she was making cookies?”

“She is, now. Those are for the meeting though.” When she started to pout, he grinned. “I may have hidden some away just for you, though, so you’ll have to not antagonize Mike and see.” In all those meetings at the house, Blake had realized just how close he’d come to meeting the other man in his last life as a UVA student. They’d only missed one another on campus by a matter of a year. He mused over how different his perception of Barnow might be now if he’d sat in one of his classes then. Elizabeth had laughed one night when he’d voiced that thought, responding that there was a good chance Blake would still dislike him.

“I don’t antagonize him!” She teasingly shoved him as they made it to the last step.

“You so do.” He laughed. As she vanished away, he turned to greet Matt, who looked barely awake.   
“Morning.”

“This is your Sunday look?”

“Elegance has no schedule.” He joked.

“You’re in a good mood this morning.” Matt took a swig of his coffee.

“Just thrilled to get this campaign off the ground.”

“Can we bring in more chairs?” Kat asked, pulling his attention away.

“Uh, yeah.” He turned to her. “From the dining room, just bring in what you need.” He realized almost everyone had arrived. “There is coffee in the kitchen, Stevie was making cookies. If you failed to come prepared, there are pens and notepads on my desk in the office through there. Mine is the one that doesn’t look like a terrifying mess.” He pointed through the doorway. Normally both desks were reasonably organized, but Mike had been working at Elizabeth’s (after Blake had threatened him to stay away from his) and there were stacks of paperwork and folders slipping into one great heap.

They all laughed when Elizabeth’s indignant ‘hey!’ was heard from the kitchen.

“We’ll get started in just a few minutes, so if there’s anything else you need, let me know.” Blake scanned the room again before ducking toward the kitchen.

“Is it about to start?” Stevie asked him.

“Almost. So, you two need to come clean up, Stevie has to be exiled upstairs.” He shifted his attention to Alison and Jason as they both groaned. “Get used to it, this is just the beginning. Actually, it’s not even the beginning yet, we all have a long road ahead of us.”

“Great.” Jason complained.

“Are you about done?” He turned to Elizabeth. “I believe the last people have arrived, so now we’re just waiting on you.”

“Yeah. I’m ready.” She started to walk through the kitchen, stopping beside him. “Last chance…” He could hear in her tone what she didn’t finish- it was the last chance for him to say she could back out and not run at all.

“You can do this.” He raised his chin, expecting her attention as he waited for her to do what she always did when he gave her this moment of confidence boosting.

Straightening her posture and taking a deep breath, she spoke. “I can do this.” She repeated with practiced habit.

==

The meeting made it a half hour before Russell turned up, giving them all a much-welcomed reprieve from Mike. Blake led the way to finding fresh cookies and coffee while Elizabeth talked. It was a bit weird for him, having his work life in his home life like this, but he brushed the feeling away and worked to play the good host, opening the fridge to find various snacks he’d bought the day before in anticipation. It was still too early to call in lunch, but some fruit would be suitably refreshing.

“Mike B is like super intense.” Kat expressed. “Think he’ll calm down once the campaign starts?”

The rest of them laughed. “Not a chance.” Jay answered. “He’s always been like that. It’s sort of like dealing with Russell two-point-oh. Looks at every potential outcome and then goes absolutely crazy about the worst ones.”

“Yeah, well, it makes him a good hatchet man.” Daisy added. “Not so sure how he’ll do as a campaign manager.” She looked over at Blake. “I’m surprised you haven’t said anything to him.”

“I am monitoring the situation.” He was about to say more, but both Jay and Elizabeth called his name in near unison from the next room. “That’s concerning.” He absently stated as he left. He found them, along with Russell and Mike, in the office. “What is today’s problem?” His eyes bounced from the three men in the room and the to Elizabeth and the way she was curled into herself where she sat.

“A news story is going to run saying I had an affair with Conrad when I worked under him at CIA.”

“Can they do that?” He was taken aback. “Isn’t that defamation?” He didn’t even have to ask, though he could tell by the look Elizabeth shot Mike, that perhaps he had. His knowledge of Elizabeth’s integrity alone told him it was a false rumor.

“The White House chose not to comment, we didn’t want to give it any steam.” Russell told him. “I wanted you all to have a heads up before you were called for comment as well. You have more to lose, but there is one tiny fact that they might dig up and I would hate to see it cause a problem, so really, you need to talk as a team and decide how you will address it.”

“What’s that?” Jay asked, confused, as Mike groaned beside him. Elizabeth sank back in the chair. “What fact?” He tried again.

“Me.” Blake answered. “If they’re already running stories about her having an affair with Dalton, it’s only a matter of time before they circle ‘round to our ‘relationship’.” He knew Elizabeth would start on how she’d been against playing up that idea from the beginning at some point, it had always been a risk, but at the time they’d decided it was a risk worth taking. And really, in the big scheme of things it still was- on its own. But a lingering accusation or hint of accusation that she’d had a relationship in the workplace before, well, that could change perspective.

==

By the time the house was once again empty, Blake could see in the way Elizabeth was sagged against the kitchen island that she was totally spent and ready to call it a day. The Meeting had lasted far too many hours. He could feel it too, the way there was a dull thud in the back of his head, but the upside had been that one marathon meeting would speed their startup up faster than a series of small meetings.

He lingered in the pantry pouring a glass of wine before carrying it, the bottle, and another glass to the kitchen. “Here.” He held the full glass up to her. “You deserve it.”

She offered him a weary smile. “Thank you, Blake. This is… This is going to happen more and more.”

“Yes.” He poured his own glass and leaned against the counter beside her. “And how do you feel about that?”

“For myself, I don’t really care. It means other people are threatened by me. That means I’m good at my job, right?”

“Right.”

“How about you? What if the attacks start on you?”

“I’m a bog boy.” He smirked at her. “I can take it. What are they really likely to do to me? Make up stories?” He sipped his wine. “I’ve had horse crap thrown at me; words are way down on the list.”

“True… But what about the kids? They’re going to read the article; they’re going to hear things about me. Be hounded by reporters.”

“We instate a cone of truth. No matter how bad or how much it hurts, we are honest about whatever is happening. They are adults now; they can handle it.”

“Cone of truth, huh?”

He nodded. He believed anything could be solved with truth and honesty, even the dirty bits no one wanted to talk about, his own recent behavior notwithstanding. It was a cornerstone of how they approached diplomacy, seeking out the truth.

“Want some truth right now?” She turned to face him. “I am done with today. I want to finish this bottle of wine, soak in a bubble bath, and then sleep until I absolutely have to go to the office.”

Blake laughed softly. “Go. I’ll finish cleaning up down here.”

Elizabeth reached for the bottle, topping off his glass before taking it with her upstairs.

Alone, Blake finished loading the dishwasher and headed back to the office to clean up the last of the paperwork everyone had left on his desk. He cleared enough space that he could set up his laptop and relax, tapping a file open and rolling his shoulders before he started typing. He didn’t notice hours had passed until the soft pad of bare feet coming down the stairs caught his attention.

“You look awful deep in thought.”

He turned, leaning back in his chair, steepling his fingers together. “Just getting some ideas for something out.” He’d only meant to work for a bit, but once he’d started, it’d been far too easy to keep going.

Elizabeth tipped her head, shoving her hands in the pockets of her robe. “I’ve seen that look before, though never on you.” She smiled fondly. “On Henry, I would call it his writing face. It was the look he got when he was finding his groove on a new book.” She walked to the doorway. “What are you writing about?”

He tipped his face up. “You.” He was happy to see her speak of Henry without any catch in her voice or sadness in her eyes. She was remembering him without it hurting.

“Me?” She laughed, clearly surprised at his answer. “Can I read it?”

“When the story is over, yes.”

“What does that mean?” She moved to stand beside him, but he shut the screen down. “Blake.”

“I’m writing about you as Secretary. It’s not a full biography, it’s… I’m hoping it will be good when it’s done. But I don’t think the ending has happened yet, so you have to wait.” He’d been working on actually writing, not just data gathering, for months now ad while it was still only first-draft quality, it felt like it was starting to come along.

“Wait, you’re not ghost writing something that’ll get my name?”

He rocked back in the chair a bit, looking at his closed computer before looking back at her. “No. Because that would be an autobiography written in your voice. Your experience and perception. Don’t get me wrong, I believe that story needs to be told, but this… This isn’t that.” This was his voice, telling the story as the person standing in the wings, watching it all unfold. There were parts he knew his own feelings bled in, but he’d decided that perhaps that was what it needed. He’d had his own feelings about many of the things that had transpired over the years and there were times when those feelings had taken a back seat to the bigger picture.

“I don’t know what to say.”

“I’m hoping one day you say you like it.”

“I’m sure I will.” She put her hand out. “Come on. There’s a new cooking show on and it’s really quiet upstairs.” When he put her hand in hers. She tugged him up from the chair. “Would you make some ice cream and bring it up? I heard a rumor and I think it means you might owe me.”

“What rumor would that be?” He was over rumors for the day, he didn’t really want to know about any more.

“That you’ve surrendered coffee duties at work.”

He laughed. He’d wondered how fast that one would get back to her. Jay had looked near tears when he’d told him. “I’ll pack an extra thermos for you every morning.”

“Thank you.” She pulled away and headed for the stairs again. “Bring ice cream?”

“Yes. I’ll be right there.”

==

Nina anxiously stood from her desk, folder in hand, and went in search of Blake, catching him as he stepped off the elevator. “Hi. Can I talk to you?”

“Sure.” He drew out. “In private?” Since they’d gotten better at communicating and had established their respective spaces, he and Nina had fallen into a comfortable work friendship. He could admit that he would actually miss working with her once his tendered his resignation.

“Please.” She nodded.

He led her toward the far hall and the sitting room at the end of the floor, pulling the doors shut. Outside of the inner office, there were few spaces to talk that were truly private on this floor. It was why often the staff resorted to leaving the building and talking on the move. “What’s up?”

“I talked to Kat a few days ago? About staying on staff with the transition team. I’m not- I never expected to be one of the staff to move up, it’s not that, and I’m thankful to stay on here, but not under the interim Secretary. And I expressed my concerns to Kat.” She sucked in a breath. “And then yesterday the Secretary called me into her office and asked about why, I’m just not sure… I told her that there’s a document about men to avoid being alone with and she asked to see it. I don’t want anything to happen to anyone because I shared it.”

“Have the claims ever been reported?” He’d heard of it before; it had been something he’d heard a rumor that Nadine had had a hand in creating.

“They always die in OCR. That’s how it is, and this document protects women as much as they can be protected.”

“I know.” His response surprised her. “Look, I’ve heard of it before, sadly it’s often the best line of defense against some of the harassment and misconduct. You should definitely share it with her.”

“Okay.” She set her shoulders back, ready to do the right thing and hand the file over.

“Or, I can. If you want.” His offer made her freeze. “Can I ask you something, Nina?”

“Of course.”

“Have you ever had an encounter that should be in that file? I’m asking as a friend and because I am aware, without the list, that there are men who women avoid. I know there are men that I do what I can to make sure a female employee is never alone in the company of. It sounds pathetic but I know that often men aren’t punished for what they do for a host of reasons.”

Nina stuttered a moment. “I- I haven’t really had anything.” She watched the look of disbelief appear on his face. “There were a few times, but nothing since I came to the seventh floor.”

“Good. Well, not good that there was a problem before, but good that it stopped. Listen, if you ever have a problem while you work in DC, please don’t ever think it’s something you just have to deal with or take because it’s _only_ a comment or _only_ something passive. Call me. Tell me and I’ll help figure out some way to deal with it. I don’t care if it’s this year while I’m on the campaign trail or next year if I’m working in the White House, or if I’m in some other job. Noon or midnight, call me and talk to me.”

She felt unexpected tears in her eyes and tried to hide it. “Yeah, okay. I- I should go take this to her before her next meeting.” She didn’t wait for a response and fled to the inner office. “Madam Secretary.” She pulled the door closed behind her. “I have that document for you.” She tried to quickly brush the tears away. “Sorry.” She mumbled when she saw her boss noticed anyway. “I was talking to Blake-”

“Blake made you cry?” Shock was clear in her voice.

“Not- No. He was being really nice and… Too nice, I guess. He’s sweet.”

That had Elizabeth giving a wry smile. “My Blake?” She laughed. “He has his moments, I suppose.” She accepted the file. “Can I ask what he did?”

“It was nothing really. He said if I ever had a problem like that-” She gestured to the file between them. “To call him.” She folded her hands together, nervous again. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay. You unfortunately haven’t been around enough years to learn on your own that my senior staff is made up of men who take a serious affront to other men who do not respect women. Goodness knows they’ve watched more than a few men try to disrespect me.” She said the last bit more to herself. “And poor Blake has the added saga of the comments and things that my daughters have experienced, so he really can get his hackles up about it sometimes.” She was looking through the pages. “I’ll handle this, though. Okay?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Thank you.”

==

Elizabeth didn’t bring it up with Blake until they both made it home that night. “You talked to Nina today?”

“Uh, yeah. She was a little nervous about trusting you with that file and she asked me about it.”

“And you did your ‘Blake the rescuer’ thing?” She laughed at the look he gave in response. “She called you sweet.”

“Oh.” He grinned. “I try.”

“No, you do not.” She shook her head, reaching into the fridge to find something for dinner. “I talked to Isabelle today, I wanted her thoughts on the article. She said something and it got me to thinking. She said that it was obvious Conrad favored me, that anyone who had eyes could see it.”

“I can believe that.” He put a hand up to stop her from getting upset. “Russell’s number one complaint since day one? That POTUS favored you.” He pointed out before he waved for her to go on.

“She said it would be easy for people back then to see our dynamic and believe that there could’ve been something to the rumors. Do I- Do I do something…”

“I think you’re letting this rattle you too much. I think that probably, he saw a brilliant analyst who had the potential to change the world and who doesn’t want to be around that? It’s literally what’s made you the exceptional Secretary you’ve been. People want to be loyal to you. I imagine he counted himself lucky to get to be a part of that brilliance. I know I do.” The surprise on her face drew a smile from him. “Some people are threatened by you, they are threatened by your natural power and will. By your ability to think fifteen moves ahead and your ability to still remain compassionate and human and vulnerable. That’s, honestly, the combination that’s going to get you elected. Because while those few people are threatened by you? The rest just want a moment of witnessing it. And a few of us, now and then, get to witness it all the time.”

Elizabeth stared at him in silence for several minutes. “How are you not married already?”

It seemed to break the moment as he laughed out loud. “I have a limited run on being convincingly wonderful and appealing at any given time.”

“And you waste it on me.” She scoffed.

“I consider it an investment in my future financial stability.” Blake shrugged as if it were nothing. “So are we past it now? The article I mean.”

“Yes. I think so. Thank you for putting up with me, as always. And thank you, really, for what you said to Nina.” She patted his arm before heading for the table. “You should take her for a drink sometime.”

He gaped, turning to stare at her walking away. “That seriously was not an attempt to, I don’t know, get me to set myself up with a coworker?!”

When she sat down, she smirked. “Why not? You’ve brought her out of her shell this far and I’ll be turning in my two weeks any day now, and you along with me. So really, you’re coworkers for like, the next couple weeks?”

He stared, unable to gather a fitting response until she began laughing. “You are horrible. I can’t believe I’ve agreed to quit my job, that I love, for you.”


	40. Chapter 40

Blake could feel Daisy’s eyes on him. Judging him. He knew what she was thinking and as much as he willed it to not be true, the reality was that, for once, she was probably going to be right. There was no way he was going to be able to ‘bad cop’ any of the McCord kids. Even if he had it in himself to be that guy before, which Daisy was probably also correct in declaring that he most certainly did not, that was before nearly three years of them learning all his tells, all his own buttons. And if there was one thing those kids had definitely gotten from their mother’s side, it was how to be evasive, stubborn, and how to land a barb.

“I just don’t see it.” Daisy had, thankfully, waited until they were on the elevator down from the chat with Mike B before she commented on him and his assumed failure at the task ahead.

“See what?”

“Where you can be tough. You’ve spent three years being _liked_ by the McCords and frankly, I don’t even know why he thinks there’s anything you don’t already know about the kids.”

“Well… I didn’t know Jason was drinking at parties until his computer got hacked, and… I am really not their confidant about, well, anything. They keep me just as shut out as Elizabeth.” Or maybe more so, he wasn’t sure. There had never been any attempt, accidental or otherwise, to ever cast him in any role of authority. Part of that was simply the kids were far too old to need it. He’d only ever been there as a friend. The closest he’d ever gotten was forging signatures, with blanket permission, from time to time on school slips and the odd heart-to-heart when he happened to be the one available. They never actively sought him out though.

“But they like you.” She gave him a look as if it were obvious. “And you like them liking you. All of them. Mike may be crazy, but he’s right. The kids need to get all their secrets out so I know what I’m dealing with. And you, mister likable, are going to have to play a little bad cop.”

“I will make sure that they do not like me when we are done. Which probably won’t take a whole lot actually.” If he started asking these kinds of questions, they were all going to get upset quickly. He worried about what kinds of things they would hit back with and how much they would do in front of Daisy and how much would come later.

“I’m holding you to that.”

“When should we get started?” He asked, hoping it wouldn’t be right away.

“The Secretary’s out of town, let’s get this over with before she gets back.”

“Right.”

==

“Jason, we need to talk.” Blake did his best to look authoritative though he could see it was having zero affect on the youngest McCord.

“It’s about your posts online.” Daisy took over. “Some of them could cause some problems for your Mom, you understand? Could you tone some of them down or maybe even delete a few?”

“No.” Jason answered simply.

Blake looked from Jason to Daisy and then back again with a nervous laugh. “You do understand that they could cause her real problems with running for president?”

“Hello! First amendment?”

“The thing is, there is a big difference between having the freedom to do something- say, write a post, and it being the right thing to do.” Daisy tried.

“I’m not changing who I am just because she wants to run for office. How is it fair for me to change who I am?”

“I understand-” She tried to calm him down.

Jason stood. “Do you? Because I’ve had to hear about changing myself every day since we came to Washington. I’m tired of it.” He stormed off.

“Jason!” Blake tried to call him back, to no avail.

“Way to help out there, mister bad cop.” Daisy shot Blake’s way.

He sagged slightly. “I’ll keep talking to him.”

“You do that. Now, is Alison home at the moment?”

The conversations with Alison and Stevie hadn’t faired much better. He hadn’t even known that Ali had been doing pot, in any form, which had thrown him for a major loop. And then Stevie, well, he’d known in the past about her dates with Harrison but hadn’t realized that they’d carried on now and again even though he was still in and out of rehab. And that was all on top of Daisy sussing out that both girls had extremely causal views to relationships and dating in general. Once the kids were all sufficiently irritated and had all stormed off in turn, Daisy turned to him.

“You suck at being bad cop.”

“How is anyone surprised by that?!” He wasn’t even going to try and defend it at this point. It was who he was. “I apparently live in a house and know nothing about what else is happening in it. I feel so…clueless. I really don’t even now what to think right now, so there’s really nothing you are going to say to tear me down further.”

Daisy had started collecting her things as he’d been rambling and was almost ready to go. “All that stuff you just mentioned? I’m pretty sure that’s called being a parent, Dude.”

“Oh, god. Maybe I’m not cut out to ever do that.” He listened to her laugher as she left.

==

“Well, that happened.” It was Elizabeth who said the words once her office was cleared of reporters and photographers.

The four of them familiar with the phrase all tittered and Jay couldn’t help himself to finish it out. “It sure did, Ma’am.”

Looking around the room, Blake gestured with his chin to Nina to get the main door while he closed the one to the conference room. Knowing what was coming, she silently let herself out so they would have the moment in privacy.

“I mentioned to Matt and Daisy earlier, this has been the best job ever. And the lot of you have been a big part of that.” She took a deep breath and let it out. “I know it’s a big commitment to walk away from this place, so if you feel like you want to change your mind, I understand.” She was met with assurance that they wouldn’t. “Well then, we have two weeks to finish changing the world.” She started to push off her desk, but realized none of them had budged. “What’s going on?”

Jay and then Matt turned and looked to Blake, who accepted that the group wanted him to take the lead. “We all have been putting our heads together and how to honor this moment. We tossed around all sorts of ideas that just seemed to miss the mark. This step, what we believe that you’re about to accomplish, it needs to be marked by something that will help everyone remember it.” He backed up, opening the closet, the one place he knew he could store a gift without her finding it. Pulling out two boxes, he shut the door and moved to stand in the line the others had formed. He looked around at his friends before handing a box each to Jay and then to Matt, who looked at their boxes before Jay stepped forward with his first.

“We decided on two.” Jay explained. “This one is for looking forward.” He handed Elizabeth the box and then stepped back into the line as they watched her open it to find a large book filled with thick paper. “It’s for writing all those moments that will happen starting from your official declaration until your last day. This is the place to write about the wins and the losses we’ll face together. I plan on there being a lot more wins than losses, though.” He grinned as they all chuckled.

“Wow.” Elizabeth looked close to tears. “It’s wonderful.”

Matt stepped forward before she could get too weepy about it. “This one is for looking back.”

The book inside this box was just as big, but instead of blank pages, it was filled with what looked like assortments of letters, some handwritten, others typed. “What’s this?” She looked up as they all looked to Blake, so she did as well.

“Last fall I started on a project. And when we talked, the four of us, they really liked it and expanded it. These are all letters written by people who’ve worked with you since you took this office. Some of them maybe only once, others many times. There’s a letter from Russell, from Minister Chen… From Yousif’s best friend, who wrote about him speaking of you. From the wife and sons of Zahed Javani.” He had to pause a moment, some of the calls he’d made had been hard, not because the people he spoke to had had any problem helping out, but because they’d brought back sometimes turbulent memories. “Every single one of these is a positive memory or story they had of you. It’s a moment when they were in awe of your integrity or your strength.” His voice cracked and he ducked his head. He’d had to read, to vet just in case, every one of the hundreds of submitted items.

“We know, Ma’am, that this next journey is going to be hard on all of us.” Daisy stepped in. “But more so on you. So, when you have moments when you feel beaten down, when you wonder why you’re putting yourself through it. You have this to open and look over. All of these people believe in you, they’ve seen the good in you.”

The tears fell now, Elizabeth brushed them away but didn’t try to hide it. “I can’t believe you all did this for me.” This time she did push off the desk, putting the books down before holding out her arms. “Hugs, come on. Group hug will do for now. You had to know it would happen with a present like that.” She pulled them all in until it was one group hug. When they finally broke apart, she had to ask them. “Are there letters from you guys in here?”

They all exchanged looks and then nodded. “Spread out in there.” Matt answered out loud. “Of course, if you ever feel like just reading it isn’t enough, you can always just ask, and we’ll share more.”

“Suck up.” Jay whispered under his breath.

==

The two weeks had flown by for all of them. Blake had felt like it was simply non-stop from the moment their notices had been turned in until they were all walking out with their things for the last time. They’d planned it purposefully for a Thursday, even though it felt awkward. It gave them a three-day weekend though to handle anything else that needed handled before the Monday morning official campaign announcement. On the Friday, he and the family had driven out to the farm with Elizabeth behind the wheel for the first time in years. It was her only weekend of freedom between the Diplomatic Security ending with her tenure at State finished and when the Secret Service would take over at the rally. For three days, she would be free to do whatever she wished without four or more people shadowing her every move. Blake hadn’t been surprised when she spent most of the weekend running every little errand she could find just to enjoy the pleasure.

By Monday, things had settled down and the realization of what everyone’s new normal was going to be had sank in. Mike was right, this was a marathon and there would be no room for a break or for things to take a slide. Running as an independent, even on Dalton’s legacy and Elizabeth’s own consistent popularity, was a difficult road. Independents almost never won, there hadn’t been a Secretary win an election in over a hundred years, the list went on and on.

“Are you ready?” Blake sat in the living room of the farmhouse; the pasture out back was filling with people as Elizabeth finally came down the stairs. “There’s really no looking back now.” He’d been up since his usual time, he’d met the other staffers who’d turned up before dawn and had kept himself busy overseeing every little detail. It helped him not irritate anyone getting reading inside.

She sucked in a breath and carefully blew it out. “Sure, why not.” She laughed when he grinned. “Already quit my day job, so I guess I might as well.”

“You have your speech cards, they have been vetted and reviewed by roughly a dozen people, so don’t go off script. Please?”

“Not today at least.” She couldn’t help it; he rolled his eyes once he realized she was teasing him. “I’ll save that for tormenting Mike.”

“I might let you. I still can’t believe he wants me to do some campaigning on your behalf.” He moved to the door, holding it open so she could step out and walk to where the rest of the staff were waiting. “Six months ago, I thought you were nuts for picking this weekend to announce, but you know what? I think you were right to follow your heart.”

“It feels like Henry’s here.” She shared. She’d picked the weekend that fell with the third anniversary of his passing. “Mike thought I was crazy too.”

“Pretty sure that’s just him projecting.” He grinned.

“Probably.” Elizabeth stopped, turning to him. “Ready to do this?” She asked him this time.

“I’ll be right here.”


	41. Chapter 41

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have poked at this one to the point that I have surrendered and it is what it is. I want to move forward with better parts, so we will all muddle through together.

Blake walked back to the table Daisy was waiting at with drinks. “So…what’s the plan tonight?” He grinned. It had been another long, hot day and the entire team was glad to be done and able to let loose.

Daisy laughed. “I wasn’t actually serious about finding a hookup, you know.” She did let her eyes wander around the bar, however. “Were you?”

“Are you kidding me? A new town every night, coast to coast? I plan on seeing as much of what the country has to offer as I can.” It was only the end of week two and he still was running off the adrenaline of it all. That would probably wear off all too soon, but he was going to ride it as long as he could.

“I have never seen this side of you before. Matt will be disappointed when I tell him.”

“Really? Tell Matt?” There was mock horror in his voice. He knew he’d definitely abandoned his all-work persona from State, but letting Matt in on the secret that he could be cool and normal too?

“You bet your ass I am. Mister uptight bedding a woman in every city.”

He shrugged. “Or man.” He offered it without thinking too hard. It was time, he decided, to be more honest with other people around him.

That stopped her mid-drink. “Oh?”

“Yeah.” He shrugged, waving it away like it was nothing. He wanted it to be nothing and prayed that Daisy would stay cool and move on.

“I’ll make sure to book our rooms non adjoining then.” She teased.

He rolled his eyes but let her have her fun. “I plan on starting tonight, so excuse me.” He stood. When she cackled again, he shot her his best attempt at a sultry smirk before walking to the bar and toward a group of women who were already smiling at him. Yes, tonight was shaping up to have some real potential.

He let the women draw him in, smiling to himself later when he saw Daisy leaning into a man across the room. Figuring she had followed his lead, he settled back into deciding which woman was the most likely to be charmed into bed with him that night.

==

Another hotel room, another city; pulling a t-shirt over his head, Blake watched the woman, Cindy he thought it was, finish dressing. They’d now been campaigning six weeks and he was starting to understand the whole notch in the bedpost thing. Three weeks of pickups had gotten him into a bit of a, rather sad perhaps, routine. He escorted the person in in the evening and back out the door in the morning to be sure they didn’t wander anywhere in whatever hotel they were staying in accidentally. The last thing he wanted was for the person he’d spent the night with to realize who he was, or for a reporter to start asking questions. Part of him was thrilled at the amount of freedom he was feeling while the other part was aware that Mike was also sleeping his way across the country, which made it feel as dirty as it probably was.

“Ready?” He asked the woman, holding the door for her and then escorting her out.

“Did we ever figure out who it was?” Cindy whispered. His cover for the agents in the hall, if he was even asked at all, was there was a rumor it was some famous celebrity, but he was unsure who.

He kept up the small talk until he had Cindy out the door, then he doubled back to find breakfast, finding Mike and Daisy already there with assorted aides that had been travelling with them. “Morning.”

The pair grinned back. “Very good morning.” Daisy returned.

“Oh, really?”

“I think his name was…Dale? Darrell? Started with a D anyway. There’s coffee fresh over there.” Daisy shared with him. “Yours?”

“Umm… Cindy.”

“That sounds like a name for hot sex.” Mike piped up with no shame whatsoever. When they both simply stared at him, he wandered off.

“You need to pace yourself though.” Daisy followed Blake to the food display. “I mean, getting laid regularly is definitely keeping you collected under pressure during the day, but you could get hurt or…you know, hurt something.” She alluded. “Would hate to have to stop the campaign because of a sex injury.”

“I- I don’t know how to respond to that. And why am I the one at risk of an injury? Out of all of us having a good time, huh?” He finished stirring his coffee and moved back to the table. “Why am I the one-”

“Oh shit.” Daisy said under her breath, cutting him off.

Blake twisted in his seat to see what she was looking at to find a pissed looking Elizabeth heading for her own coffee. “Morning, Ma’am.” He chirped cheerfully. The response he got was an angry glare and nothing more as she took her breakfast and left again.

Daisy was leaning forward over the table when he turned back, her voice was a low hiss. “What happened?”

“I have no idea. I swear all was well when we left last night.” He wracked his brain trying to figure out what could have come up in the hours since they’d all had dinner the night before. He hadn’t heard from the kids or Jay, so he doubted it was anything back home as all of them would have reached out to him as well.

“Well, you need to figure it out.” She was still agitated.

“Why me?” He asked, getting a look like that was a stupid question in return. “Maybe it will blow over?”

Blake held out that hope all day, but it seemed whatever had made Elizabeth angry wasn’t simply blowing over and with the schedule they had, there wasn’t much time to wait it out naturally. Once they made it to the next hotel for the evening, Blake waved off going out with the others in favor of getting to the bottom of things.

Elizabeth didn’t look pleased to see him when she opened her door. “To what do I owe the pleasure of you coming here instead of out trolling for a lay.”

The words were nasty, hateful, and made him rock back. “We need to talk.”

“I’m not in the mood, Blake.” She started to slam the door shut, but his threw his hand out to stop it, nearly getting his fingers slammed against the frame.

“We are talking.” He entered her room and shut the door behind himself. “Have I said or done something? Because I can’t read your mind and I can’t fix it if I don’t know.”

“No. Go out. Go have your fun.” She turned her back to him and Blake narrowed his eyes.

“This is about me going out.”

“Every free night we have. Every single free night and all of you run off to a bar or something to unwind. You three seem to have taken to bringing someone back. Every single night. It feels like every night anyway. And… It’s fine. Go. You’ll miss the first round.” She sat at the desk, ignoring him in favor of what looked like her latest speech remarks.

Blake simply stood in place for a moment, processing their short exchange. By the time he got it, it felt like he should’ve gotten it much, much sooner. Crossing the room, he sat at the end of the bed closest to her. “Out with it. I‘ll take it, just… Give it to me.” He could work with her anger, not her silence.

“The minute everything is over, you all bolt for freedom. Then the next day you discuss your exploits. I spend all my time listening to you all either talk about going out the night before, or plans to go out again, or how good the sex was! God, Blake! It’s like you’re all rubbing it in that I’m trapped here!” She leaned against the desk, not turning to be able to see him. “I am so alone every free minute and it’s… it’s wearing on me…. I’m sorry I snapped.” She drew a shaky breath. “But I don’t have the relationship with the other aides like I do the three of you an once in a while it’d be nice not to be dropped off at the hotel like some child being left with a sitter, while everyone else rushed out to have fun.”

_And that,_ he thought to himself, _was probably the real crux of the issue._ The first weeks, they’d only went out once or twice, but now it was every single night. Sometimes the other aides came out as well, but like Elizabeth, the three of them didn’t have the same friendship with them and so their downtime was often rather insular. The three amigos out on the town. He leaned forward, his elbows on his knees and chin in his hands and thought about it.

“Go, Blake.” She said again, bringing him out of her reverie.

“Not tonight.” He reached across to the chair, turning it until she was facing his way. “I’m sorry for being a crap friend.” His candor made her smile a bit. “I’ll text Daisy and let her know I’m not coming and then we can rent a movie and order room service.”

“That’s what I do every night.”

“Okay. Then we can take a walk around the area, I don’t really know what else there is to do and I’m not sure your agents will be agreeable to you going out to a bar.”

“No, you’re right, they won’t.” She frowned.

“I’ll be right back.” He slipped out and headed back to his room across the hall, dialing Daisy and explaining in generalizations what was going on. By the time he crossed the hall again, a plan was forming. “I talked to the agents in the hall. We’re good for getting out for a while.” He tugged her out of the chair. “And Daisy and Mike are on their way back as well, so we’ll think of something fun to do.”


	42. Chapter 42

“What are you always working on?”

Blake straightened up, muscles in his back aching from the way he’d been hunched over his laptop. “What?”

Daisy pointed. “You are always working on something whenever we have a minute. What are you so furiously working on?”

“It’s… I’m working on a book. I’ve figured out where I’m ending it, so I’m trying to get as much written as I can so I can get started running it through an editor. I want to have a polished manuscript by election night.” He turned the screen away when she tried to look, he’d been very careful to never let anyone see even a hint of what he’d been working on and he wanted to keep it that way.

“What’s it about?”

“Elizabeth’s time as Secretary through announcing her candidacy. I’m also already taking notes about her process to decide to run through her presidency, but it’s just notes until she’s in office.”

He watched Daisy’s jaw drop. “Does she know?”

“She knows about the book I’m working on now. She hasn’t read any of it, that’s why I try and work while she’s distracted by something else. I don’t want anyone to read it till I’m ready. It’s been a process and I’m about done… I think. I just keep going over some parts trying to work out how to phrase things or how much detail to give.” There had been chapters that had felt like they just poured out in an instant and then others he’d labored over for what seemed like weeks. He’d found that sometimes his mind would latch onto the smallest part of a big then and just focus on that instead of the greater event happening. He worried that it would make the book too disjointed but people in some writer’s groups he'd joined had assured him that sometimes it was exactly the most perfect thing to write about.

“I didn’t know you ever had an interest in writing.”

“I guess I just needed to right topic to write about? I’d actually been toying with the idea for years, how easy it would be to tell this story that we all lived, you know? And then I had that idea about the letters, that was actually going to be part of the book, I might still get permissions to use some of them or parts of them. Your idea to expand it into what we did was a better idea though, much more meaningful I think.”

“And you want it done for election night.”

“If she wins, I want to give it to her that night as, I don’t know, a gift. It’s sentimental and sounds silly.”

“No. I think she’ll love it.” Daisy patted his arm. “You’ve been spending a lot of time on it, you’re pretty invested.”

He chuckled. “It’s literally the last six years of our blood, sweat, and tears. Yeah, I’m invested.”

==

The rumble of tires on the road had driven him to surrender to his exhaustion somewhere close to midnight. The only real place to get comfortable without sitting upright was the pull-out in the back of the bus so Blake had crawled across it without even bothering to kick off his shoes. He hadn’t even cared that Mike and Daisy were still working, he was done thinking anything about the campaign until his brain and body had some time to reset.

Now, however, the bus wasn’t moving and the windows weren’t dark. His brain registered voices, but he didn’t move yet, instead taking mental stock of what was going on. He knew he was on the bus still, the crick in his neck told him that somewhere in the night he’d lost the pillow that he’d been using. He was still laying on his stomach in almost the same position he’d landed in not enough hours earlier.

“Good, you’re awake. We have fifteen minute to get organized and be ready to walk off this bus and greet people and I need you to go through your list and make sure everything on your end is taken care of.” Daisy was talking to him from just beyond his view. How she’d known he’d just woken up; he had no clue. “I’m thinking we can allow another ten before we have to wake her up, so be careful.”

Trying to work the pain out of his neck, Blake pushed up onto his elbows. “What?” He twisted his head to the side, trying to find Daisy, who was standing in the aisle, her tablet in hand, as she tapped on it. “Did you sleep?”

“I got maybe three hours. We can’t afford for all of us to get plenty of beauty sleep like you.” He heard irritation in her voice and started to defend himself, he’d been running on very limited sleep for over a week as they worked this recent stretch of stops.

Turning to sit upright, he realized he wasn’t alone on the bed, Elizabeth had at some point crashed on the side unbeknownst to him. “When’d she get here?” He asked in confusion.

“About an hour after you dropped, she did too. Leave her, she’s the one who has to look rested. Come on, we have work to get done before we have to get out the door.”

“Yeah.” He pushed off the bed carefully, looking for his bag. “Let me just duck into the bathroom and change. Two minutes. What are our breakfast options?” He asked through the thin bathroom door.

“Not much, there’s hardly anything out here except fried food and even at this time of day there’s not a lot of that.”

“So, emergency rations then.” He responded when he stepped out again.

“You still have some of those?” There was amazement in her voice.

“Of course.” He knew better than to ever be caught without some food option available, it was as if Daisy was totally clueless about him. “I’ll try and toss something together.” Ten minutes later, he had something that looked like breakfast organized and was leaning over the bed shaking Elizabeth awake. “You have five minutes before we have to step off the bus. You need to get changed and eat.”

Elizabeth blinked and nodded, he could tell she wasn’t even really aware of what he’d said and at this point was simply following whatever he directed her to do. He unzipped the small bathroom bag and handed her her toothbrush and toothpaste along with a face cloth. “Start with this, then you can change.” He nudged her toward the tiny bathroom and busied himself with clothing while she worked with the door open. “We have a busy schedule today.” He started, explaining the plans even though he knew she wouldn’t remember any of it. It was a mix of habit and courtesy and it helped him prepare himself for what work lay ahead. When she stepped out and passed her things over, he traded them for the clothes, moving to pull the divider that blocked off the back half of the bus shut while she turned her back to him and quickly changed into fresh clothes.

“I put together some food and there’s a bottle of water, you need to work on that before we get going.” He carried on instructing, catching her nod about the food. When she finished dressing and moved toward it, he gathered her discarded clothes off the bed and folded them away to be dealt with later. “Daisy has the comments for the press, this is an area that really favors your opponent, so we have to be on our game to get through this one.”

“Okay. On my game.” It was the first words she’d said almost all morning. “Got it.”

Blake checked his watch. “Almost time. Ready?” When she stood to her feet, he looked her over for anything that would make the vultures start circling. “Hold on.” He crossed the small space and rifled through the bag again, pulling out a tube of lipstick. “Go put this one on, and then with your sunglasses, no one will know how exhausted you are.”

That made her laugh as she moved to do as she was told. “Way to make a girl feel nice there, Blake.”

“It’s not currently my job to make you feel nice, it’s my job to make you look good and win an election. Feel nice can come after we win.” When she turned back from the mirror, there was a smile on her face and he decided that his comment had done the job. She looked more awake and engaged with a smile. “Let’s go before Mike and Daisy panic.”


	43. Chapter 43

He was propped on the bed in his room, sneaking pieces of popcorn from the bag at his side as he thumbed through his phone to find a movie to stream to the hotel TV. They’d finished the day early by campaign standards and Blake was looking forward to binging something and just not thinking for a while. “I’m going to start without you!” He shouted through the open doorway into the next room as soon as he heard the water kick off.

“You better not!” Elizabeth called back.

“Movie or series? There’s a couple new ones that don’t look half bad.”

She appeared in the doorway in her pajamas and a thin robe. “Series.” Her eyes lit up. “You’re already eating the popcorn!” She scrambled onto the bed to grab the bag, but he held it out of reach. “Hey!”

“Be nice!” He chided, teasing. “And I got a second bag, you could’ve just asked.” He leaned down and picked up the second one hidden beside the bed. “Just for you.” He huffed in mock annoyance as she rearranged the pillows and blankets to get comfortable. “Ready?”

“Yes. Oh! We should watch that!”

“Really?” He looked from her back to his phone. “Original Addams Family?”

“It’s good. And funny.”

“Morticia it is.” He got it started and settled back, passing her a drink as she munched on her popcorn.

“I just love how cute and sweet they are. The perfect couple.” Elizabeth gushed through the opening scene.

“You’re going to talk the whole time, aren’t you?”

“Maybe.”

“Great.” He muttered, working to keep the smile off his face.

Elizabeth managed to keep the talking at bay till the second episode. “Do you think Henry and I were like Morticia and Gomez?”

Blake had to think about that a minute. “Maybe. In a way. The perfect couple, till death and even after.” He turned, studying her profile. “How are you doing with that?”

She worked on another handful of popcorn before answering. “I think I’m doing okay. I still miss him, mostly it’s missing the intimacy though. For a long time, I didn’t because the idea of trying to be close like that to someone else felt like I was cheating.” She sighed. “And I have you for the best friend stuff now. It’s just sucky that I decide I might be ready to start again and now there’s a chance I won’t be able to date for the next eight years.”

“If that’s what you want, I’m sure we can work something out.” He saw her turn and stare at him out of the corner of his eye. “I think it would fall in the ‘highly difficult but not entirely impossible’ column and, not to brag, but I have a pretty good track record at dealing with highly difficult.” He smirked.

She swatted him with the popcorn bag. “Take that back!” She laughed.

==

Blake hadn’t even realized he had fallen asleep until he woke up later to the room only lit by the glow of the darkened TV screen. He shifted from where he’d rolled onto his side facing the far wall, finding the popcorn bags and dropping them to the floor before he turned off the TV. Rolling to face the other way, he realized Elizabeth had fallen asleep as well, her back to his. Finding the blankets, he rearranged his pillows so he could fall back to sleep beside her.

The next time he woke, the sun was coming up through the window. He woke slowly, adjusting to the lights before opening his eyes. It took a moment to realize they were spooned together, she still asleep tucked against him. Craning his neck to see the clock, Blake discovered they had twenty minutes before his alarm would be going off, so he did his best not to wake Elizabeth yet. Instead, he relaxed back into his pillows, it was going to be another crazy day so there was no point in getting up before they had to.

Eventually, Elizabeth stirred and moved away, waking up just before the alarm. “Morning.” She mumbled.

“Morning. You have about five minutes before you need to wake up.” The response he got sounded like a grunt. “How’d you sleep?” It had been his biggest concern through the whole process as too little sleep left them all a lot busier keeping her going.

“I think okay. Didn’t mean to sleep here.” Her eyes fluttered open. “I do sleep better beside you sometimes though.” She admitted, sounding apologetic.

“I know.”

“Think the kids will be awake already?”

He was already picking up his phone before she finished asking, thumbing through the contacts until he found Alison’s number first. He wasn’t sure where Elizabeth’s phone had ended up, probably still in the next room, but it didn’t matter, Ali would answer anyway. When she did, he greeted her before hitting the speaker and laying it next to Elizabeth before getting up to start getting ready while mother and daughter talked. He listened to them making plans for when they would be back in DC, which was going to be soon, their travel was almost over, and everyone was ready to get back.


	44. Chapter 44

Blake paced nervously as the back room filed with staffers waiting for the polls to close. It was going to be close, but Mike seemed confident they had a lock. He’d opted not to take part in the last-minute push to gather votes, making the excuse that someone had to keep an eye on the supporters gathering in the auditorium. It wasn’t a job that needed him by any means, but he needed the small amount of distraction it provided. The campaign had been hard, draining, and he was thankful it was over. They’d finally dragged in from their last road trip and he’d immediately collapsed onto the couch, too tired to haul himself upstairs. It was the kids chattering that had woke him up hours later.

Now, he’d been up since the morning before, running on coffee and adrenaline and he knew the moment that vote was called, either way, that rush would vanish and he’d drop like a rock, probably in the car on the way home. But he had to keep going if she won, had to push himself to stay on task. The celebration could last into the wee hours, speeches would have to be made, hands shaken, calls arranged. He’d need more than bad coffee to keep up, but right now wasn’t the time to worry on it.

“They’re about to call it!” Someone called out backstage. Blake pulled out his phone and checked the time, finding a message from Daisy that they were pulling up. Pushing through the crowd, Blake found his way to the side door and held it open for the agents, Daisy, and then an excited, but clearly also tired, Elizabeth to enter.

“Only a few more minutes.” She practically vibrated, stopping at his side and leaning into him, letting him taker her weight for a moment. “Win or lose time.”

“Win time.” He corrected, still full of faith that they could pull it off.

Disjointed shouts started out in the auditorium, and then the familiar staffers in the hall began rushing over, giant smiles on their faces. “We won!” Jay cried with Matt echoing him. “We won!”

“Congratulations, Madam President-elect.” Daisy addressed her.

Blake looked from all of them back to Elizabeth, who was stunned silent. “I told you you’d win!”

“I can’t believe it!” She stared from one to the other of all of them.

“Well.” Matt pulled out note cards. “Time for my best speech ever.” He smiled. “I know, you want to do your own thing from the heart, but I think-”

“No, this is perfect Matt.” She cut him off. “Because, honestly, I can’t even think of a thing to say right now.” She began to lead the way to the stage, Blake kept pace, a hand at her back as he guided her through the growing crowd and to the stage with the others trailing behind. He looked around, double checking that the kids had made it as well, lining up behind their mother. The room was roaring now with cheers.

Jay leaned into Matt. “You made sure to include thanking all of us in those remarks, right?” He laughed.

==

Two A.M. had long passed by the time the limo stopped in front of the house. One of the agents, they would learn their names in time, had to wake both Blake and Elizabeth up so they could go inside. Somewhere around dumping his coat on a chair and kicking off his shoes, Blake realized he hadn’t actually spoken to her in hours even though they’d been side by side for almost all of it. Hours earlier, the kids had all come home, Blake assumed they were sound asleep in their rooms.

“It’s over.” Elizabeth groaned, exhaustion oozing from her body. “I’m so tired.” She turned to face him.

With a chuckle, he reached out, pulling her into a hug. “You did it.” He rested his chin on the top of her head. “You won.”

“It doesn’t feel real yet.”

“It’ll come in time.” He pulled back enough that he could see her face. “Sleep time.”

“Agreed.” She turned toward the stairs.

It took Blake a minute to remember. “Wait. Elizabeth. I swore I would do this now, so please, sit. I have something to give you.” He waved her to the living room before heading for his desk. “Here.” He returned, sitting beside her and placing the manuscript in her lap, wrapped in a wide red, white, and blue ribbon.

It seemed to take her a minute to figure it out. With a gasp, she looked up at him. “Your book!”

Blake smiled, pleased. “It’s a third draft, revised and edited. If you approve, it’ll go to print as soon as you’ve finished it. Everyone else who needed to sign off about it already has. I know you’re exhausted, but there’s one small thing I was hoping you’d see before you go to bed.” When she untied the ribbon, he flipped the first page open to show her the dedications.

_To Henry and to everyone along the way who made this dream a reality._

She began to tear up. “I can’t wait to read this, Blake.” She yawned.

He pulled it off her lap. “Sleep now. You can start on it tomorrow.” He stood, tugging her to her feet. “Go to bed.”

“Yes, Sir.” She laughed again, giving him a mock salute. She was most of the way up the stairs when she turned back at his voice.

“Sleep well, Madam President.” He beamed as she groaned playfully. “You’ll get used to it. Eight years in office and then that’s your formal title for the rest of your life.”

“Good night, Blake.”


	45. Chapter 45

Elizabeth sat in the Oval Office across from Conrad, each with a glass in their hand. They’d been driving the transition team a little crazy as Elizabeth was not the generally clueless incoming president they were used to. She already knew all the protocols, knew all the advisors and much of the staff and then there was this, the days Conrad simply invited her in to talk as they discussed his legacy and hers.

“You’re really keeping all my advisors?”

“For now. Most of them I helped you select, or I just have such long working histories with them that it makes more sense to keep them. They’ve proven themselves.”

“So, who all are you bringing? I can’t imagine you just abandoning your personal staff to take on mine.”

“Well, Jay’s dreamed his whole career of being in Russell’s position and I know Carol’s eager to have him home.”

“That she is.”

“Mike is coming on as an advisor and I’ve talked Nadine into coming on at least in the short term as one as well. I really don’t think she’ll stay too long, but it’ll be nice at first to have someone to turn to that I know I can trust.”

“I can understand that.” He laughed. “And if I remember rightly, Nadine was as good as Russell at keeping an ear out for the rumblings of Congress. Between the three of them, Jay plus Mike and Nadine, well, that’s a group that will keep ahead of any problem you will run into.”

“I hope so.”

“You’ll be fine.” He sipped his drink. “And the kids? What are their plans?”

“Jason and Alison aren’t even at home now. Stevie’s talking about staying in Georgetown.” Elizabeth shrugged. “She’s already found that other job so she would be able to come and go easier if she stayed there.”

Conrad frowned. “So, none of the kids are moving here with you? That’s… That’s a pretty big change, Bess. This old place, it can get kind of lonely, even with all the people around.”

“It’s all a work in progress. When Ali and Jason are home, they’ll join me, and I’ll still have Blake around.”

==

Blake pulled his scarf tighter as he looked for Alison in the crowd. The inauguration ceremony would be starting soon, and she was the last McCord he needed to locate.

“Well, this is it.” Russell made himself known at Blake’s side. “We did it, Bess in the White House.” He patted Blake’s shoulder. “Listen, I just wanted to say something to you and… I guess if I don’t get it out now, I don’t know if I ever will.” Blake waited as the older man chewed his lip. “I wanted to say thank you to you. Dragging you into the mess that Conrad and I’d created, it was a major ask of us, of me, for you to get involved. But…” He sighed heavily. “Look what you helped make happen.”

“I… You’re welcome?” Russell’s words surprised him; he wasn’t sure what to say in response. “I want to say I would’ve stepped up anyway.”

Russell smirked. “We’d all like to believe we would do something that noble, but rarely is that true.”

“Blake!” A voice cut through the crowd, ending their conversation as both looked up to see Nadine coming their way. “I’m glad to find you.” She beamed.

She’d been back in DC since the new year, but Blake couldn’t help the giant grin he got each time he saw her. “You’re here! Now I’m still only missing Ali and then we have everyone.”

“Where is Elizabeth?” She looked around the crowded space.

“Secret Service have her inside still. Did Roman and his family get in okay?” He knew her son and family were flying into DC to be in the crowd.

“They did. They’re among the millions of people out there waiting. Shindy asked why we have this thing in January.” She laughed. “I heard the crowds are significantly bigger than four years ago.”

“Yep.” Russell replied. “It was only a little bit of a big deal for Conrad to win as an independent then, and most of that win was based on the country’s love of Bess. Now? The world’s had another four years to love her even more since then. I think she’s on track to have the highest approval rating of any president on inauguration day.” He shrugged. “Even half her enemies at least admire her balls for standing her ground on issues.”

“You mean not being a politician.” Nadine pointed out.

“Well, picking a known adversary as her VP endeared her to a lot of people too. Here comes Alison.” Russell gestured to the side.

“You’re late.” Blake addressed as soon as Ali joined them. “I told you to be here fifteen minutes ago.”

Alison rolled her eyes. “I had plenty of time, Blake. And I knew we’d just be standing around forever if I listened to your time. But I’m here now, happy?”

He bit the inside of his cheek to hold back a retort. “Your mother asked me to send you her way when you finally arrived. She just wants to touch base about her wardrobe I think.” He watched her wander off before turning back to find Nadine staring at him with a pleased smirk on her face.

==

Blake let himself in the front door of the house in Georgetown, dusting snow from his hair as he crossed to his desk, dropping his satchel in the chair. Checking his watch, he backtracked to the rack and hung up his coat before heading for the kitchen to start on dinner for himself. It’d been a long day and it was nice to be able to unwind and have some solitude.

After the inauguration, Blake had joined Elizabeth at the White House as they’d discussed at length and in those early days of transitioning, it had been a benefit to be so close to the work, but as the weeks had pushed on, it turned out he wasn’t really cut out for not having a clean break at the end of most days from work, a chance to shut off. The house had become his personal refuge.

Leaning against the counter while the microwave ran, Blake let his eyes wander around what he’d realized had become truly his home. The home he’d lived in for years now. He’d felt ashamed when Elizabeth had called him on his inability to let go for the evening in order to relax, that she’d been the one to suggest that perhaps it wasn’t an arrangement that was suited to him. He’d beat himself up over the notion that he was failing to be a good friend, a good support for her by struggling, but then she’d pointed out that this was his home and it seemed silly for him to abandon it when it still had to be maintained anyway. There were still nights he stayed at the White House, either because they had to work late into the night or because she asked, but most days he arrived in the wee hours of the morning, hours before Elizabeth would come down from the residence and he would stay until she was done for the night. 

The microwave beeped and Blake pulled his dinner out, collecting a drink before settling at the kitchen table. His book was due to come out in a week. Once Elizabeth had read it through, he’d still had a few fresh edits to get through before the publisher, the same company that Henry had always used, had said it was ready. It felt like a major accomplishment that he’d actually gotten it done. His phone beeped and he dug it out, smiling when he saw a message from Elizabeth asking if he’d made it home. He shot a reply back and finished his simple meal before making his way upstairs.

Even now, it felt like a bit of a surreal life he was leading; he was thankful to have Nadine back in the inner circle to turn to when he needed someone’s honest opinion. She often worked in the periphery, liaising through himself or Jay more than anything and a tiny par of him wondered if Elizabeth asking her back didn’t have something to do with providing him with that person again he’d relied on for years to not mince words and keep his head on straight.

It was she who’d hauled him out for lunch only that day, reminding him over their meal that it would be five years next week since Henry had passed before asking what he’d planned now to do with his own life. He accepted her hint that it was really time to get serious and move past his comfortable habits and really work to find a relationship for himself. They’d talked for an hour, him admitting to her that he had started seeing someone casually when the schedule allowed. She’d been thrilled and had peppered him with questions.

Sitting on his bed, Blake remembered Nadine’s final comment as they made their way back to the White House. She’d had her hand looped around his arm as they’d walked through the tourists. She’d pointed out that Elizabeth had moved on and it was time for him to move on too. Pulling out his phone, he dialed a newer number and waited for the line to connect. Without overthinking it, he made plans to go out on a date Friday night, for once not letting the constant unknown of his job stop him from doing something he wanted. If something came up, the others would be more than willing to pitch in, and Elizabeth would understand.


End file.
